im tired of life

[zambize]

3 minutes ago, Yousef said:

@zambize I'm sad for him. He must understand that nobody can help him if he himself isn't willing to help himself. 

Whatever man. .I agree with you. .but I'm not angry. .I'm just trying to wake him up. .maybe he needs some roughness before he lose everything he care about. Much love for ya....

Do what you think is best I just wanted to share my perspective,  much love

[Sunil Kumar]

@Viking Okay, so this is the feeling that occurs in your consciousness. This is not permanent like any other feelings or desire. You are the one who is experiencing these feelings (to not do anything). It will pass away. Try not to identify yourself with that feeling. It will pass away like everything. You are eternal, nothing can shake you.

[Viking]

@Yousef

1 hour ago, Yousef said:

He refuses to listen to any advice.  When I told him try to meditate to calm your thoughts he said " thanks I mediate daily " . And when I told him go in nature and chill out he said " I can't chill cuz I'm lost in my thoughts ".!! Really? !  He is just contradicting himself. 

im sorry if im frustrating, thank you for your help, i didnt intend to be annoying. I dont see though how im contradicting myself. I am meditating daily, but i dont see how that would help being lost in thought in nature. meditation is very tough for me and not working very well, at least to silence the mind.
its just that ive tried out your advice before and it doesnt work for me.

1 hour ago, Etherial Cat said:

Contradicting yourself much?. 

I dont see how im contradicting myself. I said that I believe the voice in my head, and I said that im aware of it.

 

Edited January 3, 2019 by Viking

[Joseph Maynor]

5 minutes ago, Etherial Cat said:

[Y]ou leave the mind to enter being.

I love this.  That's what happens too.  

Edited January 3, 2019 by Joseph Maynor

[zambize]

7 minutes ago, Etherial Cat said:

There are different levels of awareness. When you stop thinking, you leave the mind to enter being.

Turn off your computer, sit on a mat. Focus on that space. Do not think about where it leads you, it is a trap, the voice is coming back by the back door.

Cultivate the void

Do the exercice. Watch the silence.

I like your post, my only point of contention is "when you stop thinking", this to me implies that there can't be any thought where in my experience it's more about the relationship with thoughts rather than stopping thoughts.  It's an important distinction because one leads to BEing and the other leads to feeling like you're on a never ending journey to cut off all thought the second they pop up

[Joseph Maynor]

7 minutes ago, zambize said:

I like your post, my only point of contention is "when you stop thinking", this to me implies that there can't be any thought where in my experience it's more about the relationship with thoughts rather than stopping thoughts.  It's an important distinction because one leads to BEing and the other leads to feeling like you're on a never ending journey to cut off all thought the second they pop up

Thinking doesn't stop but you stop clinging to thinking like a baby clinging to a baby blanket.  The idealism of thinking is seen through.  It's really just a transformation in how you ARE or how you BE, that's what Enlightenment is.  It snaps you out of a certain kind of getting lost in stories mentality that a lot of people are trained with and don't know any better.  

Edited January 3, 2019 by Joseph Maynor

[ivory]

@Viking I know you received a lot of advice already but I've been in your shoes. Not having close friends is a problem. We need friends to be healthy and happy. I know you want to be happy on your own, but this is damn near impossible in your situation. Also, you seem to suffer from self-esteem issues. From where I sit, you really need to practice self-acceptance. You think you have a lot of stuff wrong with you. You don't. If I were you, I'd get therapy, it's really difficult to see through self-judgment on your own. Therapy was an invaluable tool for my own self-esteem.

[Viking]

1 minute ago, ivory said:

@Viking I know you received a lot of advice already but I've been in your shoes. Not having close friends is a problem. We need friends to be healthy and happy. I know you want to be happy on your own, but this is damn near impossible in your situation. Also, you seem to suffer from self-esteem issues. From where I sit, you really need to practice self-acceptance. You think you have a lot of stuff wrong with you. You don't. If I were you, I'd get therapy, it's really difficult to see through self-judgment on your own. Therapy was an invaluable tool for my own self-esteem.

I wanted to start therapy for a long time, but what do i tell them exactly? i cant pinpoint whats wrong.

[ivory]

9 minutes ago, zambize said:

I like your post, my only point of contention is "when you stop thinking", this to me implies that there can't be any thought where in my experience it's more about the relationship with thoughts rather than stopping thoughts.  It's an important distinction because one leads to BEing and the other leads to feeling like you're on a never ending journey to cut off all thought the second they pop up

I agree with this wholeheartedly.

[zambize]

1 minute ago, Joseph Maynor said:

Thinking doesn't stop but you stop clinging to thinking like a baby clinging to a baby blanket.  The idealism of thinking is seen through. 

I'm happy thinking doesnt stop, I feel like people get really hard on ego/thinking/relative truth even though the mind/thought used correctly can bring a lot of value to the world.  Of course you can go all non dual and talk about how value doesnt exist etc, but relative truth has value to me and other people. I feel like a healthier relationship that pulls benefits from both Truth and relative truth resembles more of a team than the demonization I feel I see of the relative truth side.  If you wouldn't mind, what is your relationship like with your ego like? How do you view it?  

[ivory]

2 minutes ago, Viking said:

I wanted to start therapy for a long time, but what do i tell them exactly? i cant pinpoint whats wrong.

A good therapist knows what a healthy life looks like. All you have to do is tell them reveal that and the problems you have, your fears, your self-judgements. Over time you get to know each other. They will know how to help.

[zambize]

I agree with @Etherial Cat that there is a just do it factor, but I dont want there to be any confusion.  You're not looking for a destination, that keeps you away from the present and looking towards the future for a better moment.  That's not going to work because you are looking to experience the present moment as it is.  I will be very explicit in my recommendations, just incase you still dont feel like you have clarity.  Set a timer for 15-30 minutes and sit in an upright position, this matters for a lot of people because they fall asleep otherwise.  Now that you're sitting down, you can have your eyes open or closed in my experience, and you just go mentally limp.  Any time an emotion comes up, let it be, and if you sense any intent to push that emotion away or experience it less than it is being perceived, you need to let go of the control and let that emotion flow.  The same thing with your thoughts, every thought. If you start thinking you're bored, or you're disappointed it's not working, or how you want to just be done with the session, doesnt matter let them speak and listen your ass off.  I used to think if I hid my thoughts of disappointment in my life, they would just go away.  Embrace it and every other emotion and thought you have, have the attitude, "is this the best you got" towards whatever negative emotions you have.  If you still feel confused, I went and stole this from @Nahm (thank you!) So you can see various techniques, how they are done, their benefit, and even cautionary advice.  

https://sites.google.com/site/psychospiritualtools/Home/meditation-practices

Also on a personal note, I have a friend that suffers from apathy that I've been helping with some real success, but if you find any of these techniques particularly helpful, please let me know so I can use that in my personal life 

[zambize]

Just now, Etherial Cat said:

My impression is that his mind will use any type of complexity to come back at you and discuss it, like he has done it with anyone who provided him a solution so far.

 

That could totally be the case, hope it isnt.  I'm not going to discuss the techniques further, but I am super happy to discuss after he tries them and sees what kinds of traps or problems he feels he has run into from trying them with intent

[Principium Nexus]

@Viking You are overstimulated I had this too. Get some solitude, it takes some time to appreciate the things that are now present but feel empty. 

Best you can do is go into nature, hike, explore a bit maybe with small tent and turn off your phone. Surrender yourself to the senses and become one with the surroundings.

[Joseph Maynor]

@Viking

Have you done enough to find what you're passionate about exploring or working on with your time here on this Earth?  I can feel my passion.  I literally know what my passion is.  This is because I've done a sh*t-load of Life Purpose Work.  If you can't feel your passion or know where it is, then you're gonna suck at finding things to do in life that align with your passion.  So, you gotta find that passion.  This is like the Life Purpose equivalent to finding the True Self in Enlightenment Work.  Find that passion!  And then pick things to do with your time that align with your passion.  This doesn't just happen automatically, you gotta enforce this, create this for your life.

 

Edited January 4, 2019 by Joseph Maynor

[Viking]

@Joseph Maynor I did the life purpose course for about half a year but i came to a conclusion that i cant know for now what my passion is because im too young, i didnt experience enough of the world to have enough perspective to know what i want to do. the answers i give at the life purpose course are crap, because my identity hasnt solidified yet, i barely have any preferences and tomorrow i could decide that all my values i chose for the values exercise are a whole another set of values. ill wait a year or two or three before i engage in the life purpose course and find my passion.

[Viking]

thank you all for trying to help me, but as someone pointed out here i just need to get some friends, no need for me i think for some spiritual mumbo jumbo because it doesnt work for me right now. ill just have to wait it out while surrendering to the (sort of-) suffering and this period will pass.

[Leo Gura]

@Viking In other words, what you really want is to be a monk.

You just haven't realized this yet.

Your disillusionment is stemming from the highest wisdom. But are you wise enough to see that and courageous enough to actualize it?

Disillusionment is not a mistake. After are, you are inside an illusion The mistake would be to sweep the disillusionment under the rug.

What you're really tired of is the ego's bullshit games.

[kieranperez]

Read Om Swami's memoir NOW. +1 to what @Leo Gura said. This is pretty much exactly what you're saying - I don't want to be anyone. I want to transcend this game. I want to be a monk. 

Oddly enough I'm in the exact same place as you. I've shared this story a couple times on here but over the summer I was at a beach here in the San Francisco Bay Area and I wasn't really contemplating or meditating but I was sitting there with no one around, looking at the sea cliffs in the distance and all of a sudden I felt something in my chest that said "I want to be absolutely nothing." 

I know exactly what you're saying and I suggest you start to strategize to work towards this and have the courage to take this chance. You can't really go back to ordinary life with the same dumbed down mind after all you've heard from people like Leo about God, who you are, the benefits of all of this, how society is mostly just a giant zoo for ignorant suffering chimps, etc. 

[Aakash]

@kieranperez this is exactly the same situation i'm in and i choose the dumb-mind in the now version of myself, complete silence is literally deathly to my ego and i can feel it. How have you gone about strategising it?