My meditation journal

[Thittato]

Only practice today has been a cold shower. Now I'm feeling very grateful for the whole Wim Hof method. It has given me so much this winter. Seems like I'm totally back into doing the cold showers as a discipline.

[Thittato]

Weight-lifting, cold shower, and 30 min meditation. Pretty nice.

[Thittato]

45th cold-bath this season

So today has been a really nice day. I went for a long walk in the forest together with a friend, and when we came home to his place we did 3 rounds of Wim Hof breathing together, and it was pretty awesome to do it together like that after a good long walk, and then we played Chess, made food, played guitar, and I went home, and when I came home I felt so happy I did 3 more rounds of Wim Hof breathing, and then I played more guitar again for quite a while and sang mantras, and then I went down to the beach and did my cold-bath. Not exactly sure what is going on regarding the structure I have around these things - these days it seems like it lives its own life, which is nice for now. I guess I will just have to see where it is going to land this time as it is a bit up in the air regarding what my meditative/spiritual needs are these days. Some more back and forth between the Wim Hof method and my regular vipassana meditation practice is expected. Maybe I find a way to juggle both approaches. I think it will just need to sort itself out somehow by me not trying to control the process too much right now. I feel very generous with myself right now. I allow myself to just rest and live and see how things will turn out. That is going to be my affirmation for today - "I allow myself to rest." And also: "I allow myself to be good and kind with myself."

[Thittato]

30 min meditation, 3 rounds of Wim Hof breathing, and cold shower, today.

[Thittato]

Weight-lifting, 30 min meditation, and cold shower, today.

I only managed to do 10 min of meditation before working day-shift today, and when I came home from work I was pretty tired, but after some weight-lifting, the remaining 20 min of meditation, and a cold shower, I now feel super-fresh. These tools are like having access to my own little spa here in my home.

The weight-lifting routine is so awesome. It only takes 15 min, but it consists of some really powerful full-body exercises, so it feels like it gives me the absolutely most bang for the bucks I can get. And this routine also feels very sustainable, so I think I can do this routine 3 times a week. I've dabbled in a little bit of weight-lifting for 2-3 years now in combination with yoga, but I have never settled into any stable routine with it, but now I think I've found one that I can establish and then start to build on it. When the gym opens up again I think I will start to do traditional weight-lifting with a barbell. In my home I'm using dumbells. I was also using kettlebells before but they got stolen when I left them down in my basement.

The cold shower also felt totally awesome today. The water is getting a little bit warmer I can now notice. I'm pretty glad about that because there is an element of stamina in this, and now I've successfully been riding out the winter into a milder landscape.

[Thittato]

30 min meditation, and then a cold shower, this morning. It is a little bit hard to let go of the Wim Hof breathing method, but letting go of my regular meditation would have been hard too, and I don't feel I have the capacity to do both on a daily basis, but maybe I can continue to switch back and forth a little bit since I like both so much. Probably 30 min of meditation per day will be my base, but on some days when I want to spice things up or go deeper I can also add the Wim Hof breathing.

[Thittato]

Weight-lifting, cold shower, and 30 min meditation. Feels like I'm about to really nail these three really powerful tools, in the sense that they are becoming integrated parts of my routine.

[Thittato]

Cold shower and 30 min meditation today. Very restless during meditation.

[Thittato]

Weight-lifting, cold shower, and 3 rounds of Wim Hof breathing, today.

[Thittato]

3 rounds of Wim Hof breathing, cold shower, and then 30 min of meditation. Focus in meditation was just rest and surrendering into the effects of the breathing and the cold shower.

[Thittato]

A new 20 day cold shower challenge (second one).

So yesterday I started a new 20 day cold shower challenge on my Wim Hof app. I did 3 rounds of Wim Hof breathing before this, and later in the evening I did another 3 rounds together with a friend.

Today I did 3 rounds of the breathing, and then the cold shower.

[Thittato]

3 rounds of Wim Hof breathing, 15 min of weight-lifting, and then 2 min and 15 sec cold shower. At least for the duration of this 20 day cold shower challenge I think this should be my only "health and wellness routine" - daily cold showers and the Wim Hof breathing method combined with 15 min of weight-lifting 3 times a week.

[Thittato]

3 rounds of Wim Hof breathing and cold shower today as well. My practice was a little bit refreshing, but nothing more. I'm feeling really really fed up with this pandemic.

[Thittato]

3 rounds of Wim Hof breathing and cold shower today as well. I’ve only slept one hour tonight and I had to get up early for work, but the practice was very inspiring again. Tomorrow cold showers are extended to 2 min and 30 sec. 2 min and 15 sec, which I have been doing for 5 days now, already feels pretty long. I’m working it up to 3 min and 10 sec. Will be interesting to see how that goes.

[Thittato]

3 rounds of breathing today and 2 and a half minute in the cold shower. It felt pretty awesome. With 2 and a half minute all the hurry is gone, and one just has to take ones time and settle down into the experience. I'm feeling very enthusiastic about taking up this challenge again.

[Thittato]

3 rounds of breathing today, weight-lifting, and 2 and a half minute in the cold shower. Those 2 and a half minutes feels pretty awesome. I was afraid I had been getting what I could get out of this already, but now it feels like it starts to go even deeper. All the hype is totally gone. I rarly watch any Wim Hof interviews anymore. I don't care about whatever physiological effects this gives that science might have measured. But it feels pretty damn good.

[Thittato]

3 rounds of breathing and 2 and a half minute in the cold shower both yesterday and today. So beautiful. The last 30 sec in the cold shower feels especially beneficial.

[Thittato]

So maybe this Wim Hof method is like the finishing touch on my own therapeutic process. I finished 3,5 intense years in gestalttherapy (both individual therapy and group-therapy) in the summer of 2019, and after that I have just grown more and more comfortable in my job as a social worker in a psychiatric emergency hospital - a job which I’ve had for 3 years now. It is a very intense job which requires a lot of mental and emotional processing. Now it is starting to feel like I know this job so well that I can relax much more and I don’t need to think so much about it in my spare time. Along with this therapeutic process I’ve had I saw it as very important to just stay for a long time in this job and gain a sense of mastery and stability. Like measuring my own therapeutic success in how well I was able to settle down into and enjoy a career. The last polishing on this process has been to explore the Wim Hof method this winter. It seems like my neuroticism has been going down even further because of this. Like I’m gradually becoming a much more stable and robust person. I was very unstable before, even though I was very good at containing all my emotional fluctuations because this is my 20th year as a dedicated meditator so I’ve had A LOT of training in observerving my shit while it goes on, but now it seems like I don’t have so many fluctations anymore, and the ones I do have are usually within a more natural range (with some exceptions of course). My chronical existential crisis seems close to cured. And now that I once again feel a momentum and deepening, both with the Wim Hof breathing method, and with the cold water exposure, I’m very enthusiastic about continuing this process. Both when I’m in the breath retention and when I’m in the cold water I’m thinking:

«Let me be open, receptive and grateful for this healing, and let me allow it to penetrate deeply into the core of my being.»

Edited April 19, 2021 by Thittato

[Thittato]

3 rounds of Wim Hof breathing today as well, and then 2 and a half minute in the cold shower. Halfway through the 20 day cold shower challenge. Tomorrow the time is increasing again, and it will go up to 2 min and 55 sec in the cold shower. I’m excited ??

[Thittato]

On 20.4.2021 at 2:58 AM, modmyth said:

I have SO much respect for anyone who can maintain some sense of empathy and sensitivity when it comes to dealing with people and not get completely burnt out and jaded or disconnected, or just go nuts for that matter. I honestly feel like people do not get enough respect for doing these types of jobs well nor enough money for what you have to deal with on a daily basis (IMO it is a bit like teaching in that way, but your job seems way harder in terms of raw stimuli you have to deal with in your environment).

My brother's wife did a similar type of work in addictions/ with youth; I thought the type of things she had to deal with was nuts. I don't think I would have been able to cope so well in her job. I find myself thinking back to what she told me about people who would have repeated self-harm and overdose episodes, attempted suicides, etc...

I honestly think on an emotional level, you possibly have one of the hardest jobs in the world (unless you have an actual heart of steel).

I've seen the other side too though; I know sometimes people give a lot of crap to people for not being perfect enough in these roles, because to be a psychiatric patient, it puts you in an extremely vulnerable state.  I am glad though that you have been able to put so much energy and care into yourself; in my experience, that tends to inevitably pay off in the rest of your life as well.

Thank you for giving me such profound reflections back on my process. It was very profound for me to write those reflections, and it got way more profound when you gave that deep, intelligent and empathic feedback. I wish you absolute success, love, and growth. May we all help and support each others growth on this forum ?????????