My meditation journal

[Thittato]

First session of Winter-bathing this season.

Also, tonight (my sleep is totally mixed up because of working night-shifts), I had my first session of swimming out in the sea this winter. Oh my gosh. That was totally awesome. I'm not going to commit to anything, but just take it spontanously, but I see myself doing some more of these sessions. It is such a high afterwards, and I feel so rebooted. I remember last winter, when I got really turned on to Wim Hoff, how inspired I was, and how much it inspired me when it comes to physical exercise, the mental attitude of toughness, and the pursuit of masculinity.

[Thittato]

Second session of Winter-bathing this season.

Intense session of winter-bathing.... hahha......

Edited December 10, 2020 by Thittato

[Thittato]

20 min vinyasa flow in the morning today, and then the same program one more time now in the evening. Soooo good. I was skating in the skatepark yesterday, and it was pretty hard on my body, so I need to do some more yoga now in order to keep up with the skating. But anyways, I've made massive progress with the skating, so having to do the yoga is just an added bonus to the process.

[Thittato]

30 min meditation tonight as I’m working night-shift.

I’m so inspired by rollerblading, and extreme sport in general, these days. It seems like the perfect extension of ones yoga and meditation practice. It is all about cultivating that flow.

I’m watching a lot of skate-videos these days, and I’m listening to a lot of podcasts by people who are into these types of sports. So nice to really immerse myself in this culture. I hope I can keep my awareness going regarding how I translate my yoga and meditation-practice into rollerblading.

It also really helps me to balance my obsession with Chess. Been watching so many youtube videos with Chess-content since I got into Chess 2,5 years ago, and I’ve been having ambivalent feelings about getting into Chess because it often makes me feel like just another gamer, but somehow I’m addicted, but I think skating is a much healthier addiction, especially since it is easier to connect it with my yoga and meditation practice.

[Thittato]

30 min meditation today. Sobering.

[Thittato]

Third session of winter-bathing this season.

Been working night-shift for to nights now, and I felt that I needed something to calm me down after this shift before I go to bed. Winter-bathing was perfect. I really baked that manic buzz I came home from work with out of my system by taking a nice cold bath down at the beach.

[Thittato]

30 min meditation today as well. I’ve been so extremly inspired by rollerblading and the whole skating-culture lately, listening to podcasts, watching skate-videos etc, finding new rollerbladers on instagram and new styles, and discussing all this with my best friend who is also really high on rollerblades these days, and we are finding old pictures of ourselves when we were rollerblading in our teens and talking about our past a lot and what led to what, etc. It feels fun and healthy, but meditation is a nice way to keep this inspiration balanced, and it brings me back to myself again. I have some resistance towards meditation these days, because it sort of interrupts the flow of inspiration that I’m in and brings me back to the more boring and serious aspects of life, but at the same time it also feels very calming and sobering.

[Thittato]

30 min meditation today as well. Felt really good and valuable. I tend to freak out because I get so obsessed with things. It was chess just a few weeks ago, and now it has been rollerblading for some weeks. That either/or, black and white ON/OFF dynamic regarding this seems to have been softened a lot lately as well. I go so heavily into these things that it stirrs up a lot of doubt in me and I start to think I have to cut them out completely. Seems like this has been softened very much. I'm thinking these days more in line with "It's normal to have interests" and "It is normal to alternate back and forth between various interests." My self-talk is getting more mature, and less sort of self-talk out of some kind of panic-mode.

[Thittato]

Fourth session of winter-bathing this season.

Aaaaaah.... So nice <3 It really is like a reboot for my system. All the stress that has accumulated during the day suddenly just dissolves. And today I was even in doubt about whether it was the right decision, thinking I was challenging my winter-bathing stamina too much by doing this too often now that I have just started up again. I was angry and stressed as I walked out into the water, resisting to dip down so that my shoulders also got under water, but as soon as I overcome that resistance and sank down so that only my head was above...... aaaaaaaaah, all stress dissolved and I felt like a hero again.

[Thittato]

20 min vinyasa flow yoga this morning, then 30 min meditation, and then 20 min yoga nidra. Pretty sweet program. I love this practice.

[Thittato]

30 min meditation today as well. Lots of resistance. I didn't want to apply my technique for the first 15 min, I just wanted to sit and surrender into the experience, but everything got a lot smoother when I started to apply the technique.

[Thittato]

30 min meditation today. Feels like my technique keeps getting better and better.

[Jai]

On 12/14/2020 at 4:43 PM, Thittato said:

Fourth session of winter-bathing this season.

Aaaaaah.... So nice <3 It really is like a reboot for my system. All the stress that has accumulated during the day suddenly just dissolves. And today I was even in doubt about whether it was the right decision, thinking I was challenging my winter-bathing stamina too much by doing this too often now that I have just started up again. I was angry and stressed as I walked out into the water, resisting to dip down so that my shoulders also got under water, but as soon as I overcome that resistance and sank down so that only my head was above...... aaaaaaaaah, all stress dissolved and I felt like a hero again.

Where do you live? It sounds like you're doing cold water exposure. I take cold showers and love the benefit. The mental resistance is tough, it never gets easy but if I can talk myself into taking a cold shower everyday I can develop a strong mind. How do would you describe mental benefit from this?

[Thittato]

19 hours ago, Jai said:

Where do you live? It sounds like you're doing cold water exposure. I take cold showers and love the benefit. The mental resistance is tough, it never gets easy but if I can talk myself into taking a cold shower everyday I can develop a strong mind. How do would you describe mental benefit from this?

Yes, cold water exposure :-) I live in Norway. Well. It is very refreshing. I love it, and it feels like it gives me a huge boost. I only do when I feel like, though, so its not like I’m following a systematic training regime.

[Thittato]

30 min meditation today. Very good flow.

[Thittato]

Fifth session of Winter-bathing this season.

And 30 min of meditation earlier in the day. Nice. Nice. Nice.

[Thittato]

Sixth session of winther-bathing this season.

Yesterday. Also 30 min meditation yesterday.

Today: 45 min meditation. Very good flow.

[Thittato]

30 min meditation today as well. The feelings of stuckness I encountered a few weeks ago are totally gone. Now there is a lot of momentum again. Unfortunately, or fortunately, it seems like I'm getting more unstable when my meditation goes deep. I guess that is natural. When the mind becomes really still and soft, my being opens up for more emotional stuff stored in my body to come up to the surface. So whatever cycles are activated because of this, it is good to know that I can ride these cycles out, and then return to my still point again in meditation.

[Thittato]

30 min meditation today. Zero focus. Haha. Pretty huge contrast compared to yesterday.

[Thittato]

30 min meditation today. Feeling deeply blessed.