The reason for my extreme behavior

[Aquarius]

There are 3 dynamics:

1. male - male
2. male - female
3. female - female

When a male treats me like a male it's insulting, really. People that try to give me the compassion they need. I need to be treated like a girl.

I was authentic and pure and innocent this whole time. People were projecting their assumptions on me and were trying to fix me and I gladly surrendered and was a doormat, and it just damaged me. I need not to be fixed.

I had time to contemplate in my "cave".  I'm back now. Don't take anything I say too personally, you guys. 

I remember Leo had a moment when he was asked what he will do in 1 year, what are his plans etc etc. And he said "Who knows, my plans change every day as I develop myself [...] maybe I will kill myself,". He literally said that and I contemplated that sentence so much. It wasn't him trying to scare anyone or coerce anyone. It was an authentic expression of his thoughts. I respect Leo so much.

I realized I need to ground myself into something. I think that's why models are useful. They give a structure to ground into.

So I'm grounding into these model aspects:

• ESFJ-A
• Coral
• 10th ox
• The Pioneer archetype
• The Aquarius archetype

Not leaving anywhere. Sorry if I created any worry. <3 

Edited December 17, 2018 by Aquarius

[Cortex]

Keep Going :*

[Joseph Maynor]

Good job.  You seem to be a hard worker like me when it comes to personal development.  

[Artaemis]

You seem witty and energetic to me. And very authentic. 

[Aquarius]

@Cortex @Joseph Maynor @Artaemis So I wasn't an asshole after all.. ?  <3 

 

[Joseph Maynor]

15 minutes ago, Artaemis said:

You seem witty and energetic to me. And very authentic. 

Both of you have amazing energy!  

[Aquarius]

@Joseph Maynor I respect you so much!  

[Leo Gura]

On 12/17/2018 at 2:45 AM, Aquarius said:

I was authentic and pure and innocent this whole time.

Ain't nothing innocent about that ego

The devil always considers herself to be an angel.

[CreamCat]

3 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Ain't nothing innocent about that ego

The devil always considers herself to be an angel.

Hahahaha.... Leo comes in to throw a wrench.

[Aquarius]

@Leo Gura Playing Devil's advocate much, yes. I'm full of bullshit.