Zigzag Idiot and the ladder of Objective Reason

[DrewNows]

Watched that Alan Watts vid a few weeks ago and it’s really something ??

[Zigzag Idiot]

 

I experience ego structures often trying to stake a claim as a part of the identity of the witness or witnessing state. This seems common for many on the path.

 

Turiya is a good word to write on your refrigerator. 

 

https://youtu.be/zSafhz0qfwU

 

[Zigzag Idiot]

  @Marc Schinkel  For a refrigerator reminder, Turiyatita is probably better.

[Zigzag Idiot]

@Marc Schinkel it's pretty much close to being that way! ?

I lived on Ramen noodles for years but finally gave them up. My diet is still terrible.

[Zigzag Idiot]

I'm on NN Dmt now. 

I ts hot outside a a  I go t my chores done,

i smoked 50 milligrams I a machine ball likefore 

I s

just snorted a mother 30 mg's 

it getting more difficult to type. Now  I'll check back.  ,,,,,,

Edited July 9, 2019 by Zigzag Idiot

[Zigzag Idiot]

What a nice deep sleep I got after my short trip!

I didn't achieved an extreme breakthrough but by loading the machine ball ( compressed ball of copper wire) with the NN dmt, it completely changed the experience. No harsh taste and also a loss of fear about the substance. At one point, I couldn't help but close my eyes as I lay back on my bed and just watch all the almost comical hallucinations. They were very colorful, symmetrical and in constant change. I experienced brief instances of exhilarating Joy. At first it felt like what some refer to as a heavy body load but it seemed to dissapate or transform into a peaceful, relaxed body.

The big news for me is the big reduction in fear I now feel about NN dmt. This was a slightly stronger experience than what I had last week. So l think I'm on the right track to being able to get a strong breakthrough experience with a litttle more work on modifying my method and smoking device I load the machine ball into. 

My days and nights are now completely upside down which in itself is a novel and therapeutic for me. I've always been very clock oriented creature of habit-- wake up at daylight-- eat lunch at noon because it's 12:00--quit work late afternoon-- etc,,,,  My new situation allows me to manage my responsibilities with much more flexibility. This also seems to be of help in this kind of experimentation.

Had some very interesting visuals (hallucinations) and thoughts before I drifted off into sleep for a solid 8 hours.

This Digeradoo hypnotic wave You tube shared by @Keyhole last week was a great piece to have playing during the expierience.

 

[Zigzag Idiot]

I experimented more with NN dmt today and just left a small report on the NN dmt thread.

An interesting side note is that during my trip today the crickets in the background sound I've been hearing for the last year and a half returned during my trip. For the last couple of weeks this phenomena has been more sporadic than normal.

The sound also disappeared for a couple of days around the time I first tried Modafinil but appearantly this was coincidental.

I know this has to sound weird but it is what it is. For the majority of the time over the last year and a half this has nearly been constant. This hearing a chorus of crickets. It's related to the frontal lobes I feel sure because it seems to get louder when my forehead feels that subtle pulse or pressure which is also more noticeable during Centering Prayer meditation. It seems to coincide more with objectless or non conceptual awareness or maybe states close to,,,, How's that for paradoxical? ?‍♂️

Generally there is more of a heaviness on NN dmt trip days. Something else that I'm just trying to observe more about,,,,

[Zigzag Idiot]

Experiencing panic attacks and deep depression years ago along with bad drug experiences are things that broke me open to where I remember saying " I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy ".

I had to work my ass off out in the hot weather today. Thought I was gonna have a heat  stroke for a bit. Being exhausted from hard physical labor helps to ground me sometimes. I feel that way this evening.

Edited July 12, 2019 by Zigzag Idiot
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[Zigzag Idiot]

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Posted Wednesday at 10:49 AM · Report post

   On 7/10/2019 at 9:01 AM,  moon777light said: 

If we dont bring mindfulness throughout our daily lives, we might as well not meditate at all. Interesting thought.

Lyrics from the song

"There's a space I'm looking for
I grind all the time 7/24"
 

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The kingdom of heaven is within.

 

On 7/10/2019 at 10:49 AM, Colin said:

Lyrics from the song

"There's a space I'm looking for
I grind all the time 7/24"
 

 

Edited July 12, 2019 by Zigzag Idiot

[Zigzag Idiot]

In the Science of Idiocy there's an ongoing return to Ordinary Idiot.

Ordinary Idiot as in - Zen mind is Beginners mind.

Zen mind is also Ordinary Idiot.

An Ordinary Idiot is free and spontaneous and most importantly, nonself reflective in a neurotic way.

Ordinary Idiots don't fall down the spiral of inner considering.

Zen mind is Beginners mind is Ordinary Idiot.

 

[Zigzag Idiot]

From A.H. almaas

All Spiritual Work Would be Pointless if There Were Such a Thing as Ultimate Evil

As we have seen, each Holy Idea is a characteristic of reality at all locations, at all times, and at all levels. Holy Truth explicates this understanding. Here, we are saying that not only is reality just one presence that is boundless and real, but that it is also positive, blissful, and wonderful. So not only is God one, but God is also wonderful and made of love. The truth, then, is loving and lovable, which is why we say in the Diamond Approach that you must love truth for its own sake. If your orientation is that you love truth so that it will change you and make you a happier person, your orientation is out of sync with how things objectively are; if you see reality as it is, you can’t help but love it. It follows, then, that objectively there is no evil. We see evil only when we perceive reality through a filter. A person who behaves in what we consider evil ways is a person acting through a distortion. In spiritual work, concepts of a devil, of dark forces, of some evil that exists on its own outside of the goodness of reality are considered manifestations of ignorance, both in terms of believing in such concepts and in terms of the manifestations attributed to such forces. All spiritual work would be pointless if there were such a thing as ultimate evil.

Facets of Unity, pg. 215

[Zigzag Idiot]

We project whatever is unconscious in us onto someone else in our environment

We can forgive others if we can observe it in ourselves 

From https://facim.org/online-learning-aids/theory/

 

 

Also

 Leo gives interesting talk on his blog

https://www.actualized.org/insights/tapping-into-collective-consciousness

 

everything is Chaos,,,, it's ok 

 

[Zigzag Idiot]

I only tell everyone what to do because I can't help it.

I'm that kind of Idiot.

[mandyjw]

55 minutes ago, Zigzag Idiot said:

I only tell everyone what to do because I can't help it.

I'm that kind of Idiot.

Love has its way of doing that to people. 

[Zigzag Idiot]

2 minutes ago, mandyjw said:

Love has its way of doing that to people. 

??

[Zigzag Idiot]

Hats off to everyone doing shadow work and integration. There's wisdom in having a closed Journal for such. 

This journal is partly a shadow work and integration Journal but it's open for comments and questions unless someone just wants to argue. I hold a lot of things in the 'as if it's true' category and just state things as fact instead of always prefacing all claims with disclaimers of some kind.

[Zigzag Idiot]

As with schadenfreude, I've seen layers of passive aggressiveness in myself. I've seen this a lot in families that are around blue/orange especially.

Parents and grandparents in families spreading fear to keep a handle on children. They were raised in fear and guilt and just pass it on. Even among educated people this happens. This never quits creating problems.  It requires seeing all the way through to forgive a Parent who is this way. That's a tall order because there is usually several years of anger, guilt, confusion, etc., to work through.

Its horrible what family members do to each other. It's just more sleep. Everyone suffers. Everyone is off balance. An Awakened family member can also eventually lead the others out of hell. But sometimes not.

 

[Zigzag Idiot]

@Marc Schinkel Thanks! Yes, both funny and informative.

 

 

 

"Christianity institutionalized guilt as a virtue"- Alan Watts @ 14:30 referring to Catholicism and Protestantism.

"Churchianity" or "Jesusism" as Paramahansa Yogananda humorously put it in his Autobiography.

 

 

Just 20 minutes into this.

Although it's from 2014, it's very good if you're new to Bashar as I am.

[Zigzag Idiot]

I enjoy Russell's sense of humor.

[Zigzag Idiot]

Its a wonderful day!