ZenBlue

100 Days Of Meditation

105 posts in this topic

16 hours ago, ZenBlue said:

Day 47 and 48

Had a 30 minute meditation session.

Although my mind still feels chaotic I am still keeping up with the meditation. I think the changes in me are so subtle and gradual that it's very difficult to grasp. I'm still kind of questioning the real benefits of meditation, but I still feel like there is something I can learn through meditation. Just the very act of setting time aside to just sit and not do anything does help me to appreciate the moment, however brief.

I'm so glad about your persistence through 48 days of 30 minute meditation sessions! I'm so glad that you're starting to gain benefits from meditating! Like Leo said, the results don't come instantly but when you delay gratification, you will get excellent results. While i don't meditate, I'm working on recapturing the childlike state of being fully immersed in the moment and feeling playful and happy without a care in the world. I love swinging on the swings or enjoying the beauty of a spring or summer day. 

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@Zane Sounds like fun. Being able to feel that childlike state can be a form of mindfulness. 

Day 49

Had a 30 minute meditation session.

I had a light tingling sensation in my head after the meditation. I think that means there is some type of change taking place. I'm just going to keep meditating and see where it leads me.


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Day 50

Had a 30 minute meditation session.

I noticed today that I used to have a very easy life. I was just coasting through life until about 4 years ago. That's when things started to get hard and when I started to struggle. I have become a stronger person because of my struggles, but I'm not quite out of it yet. I still have a lot of work ahead of me. I'm going to keep on my meditation path because I feel that it could guide me in the right direction.


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@ZenBlue GREAT NEWS!!!!!! You're halfway finished with your meditation days, you have 50 days left of meditation left. I love how you're focusing on 30 minute sessions and what have been the challenges and joys of meditation?

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@Zane Thanks! Yea I can't believe I'm already half-way there. All I did was take it day by day and it all added up. I'd say the challenges are that some days I still don't feel like doing it. It's not an automatic habit for me yet. I still have moments where I really want to do something else instead. Sometimes I'm in a really bad mood. Then it would be very difficult to meditate. I just do it anyways even though I'm still in a bad mood during the meditation. It has been very challenging to let my thoughts go. Most of the time I can't do it. If I'm lucky maybe I can let my thoughts go for 2 - 3 minutes.

As for the joys, I think it has made me a bit calmer inside. Sometimes I get a better sense of myself and my life. I have brief moments of clarity, but those moments shut down quickly. I think by continuing meditation for a while, I will start to see everything more clearly and I will be able to then know exactly what needs to be done. I'm going to continue meditating with the faith that at some point, it will give me the clarity that I need.

Day 51 and 52

Had a 30 minute mediation session.

Letting go of my thoughts is still a big challenge. I have learned that letting go of my thoughts is a practice that I can apply to my everyday life. I can use it to let go of the past, let go of anything I perceive as wrong, let go of any idea that does not empower me. At some point I will be able to let go of all the arbitrary rules set by society and free myself from all the things that have been weighing me down. I yearn for freedom, as much as I yearn for the truth, as much as I yearn to breathe.


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Day 53

Had a 30 minute meditation session.

I wonder if meditation has profound effects that I'm not aware of yet. It seems that all the "chi" masters practice meditation. Now I wonder what would happen if I meditated every single day for 20 years? I want to make meditating my lifelong daily practice. I will commit to meditating every single day for the rest of my life. When the 100 days is up I will still meditate whether I notice any benefits or not.


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Days 54, 55, and 56

I am still meditating for 30 minutes.

It feels like every time I start to make some progress I run into some major issue that sets me back a lot. I am dealing with some personal things that just happened today, and if I can't fix it then it will be a very big hit for me money-wise. Other than that life is good. Somehow I will get through this as just another part of life.

Sometimes I do feel a lot calmer, but I still have so many thoughts in my head and it's still very hard for me to direct my attention onto something for long periods of time.


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15 hours ago, ZenBlue said:

Days 54, 55, and 56

I am still meditating for 30 minutes.

It feels like every time I start to make some progress I run into some major issue that sets me back a lot. I am dealing with some personal things that just happened today, and if I can't fix it then it will be a very big hit for me money-wise. Other than that life is good. Somehow I will get through this as just another part of life.

Sometimes I do feel a lot calmer, but I still have so many thoughts in my head and it's still very hard for me to direct my attention onto something for long periods of time.

I'm glad that you're feeling a lot calmer with meditation and that you're accepting and not denying the problems. I'm glad you realizing how life is good! I've been creating a mindset that is "I am free to create my life however I want." I strongly value freedom and I've been applying this mindset by discovering new opportunities and discovering new hobbies and passions and writing down when I have a moment of happiness or a consistent day of happiness. My number of happy moments and happy days have skyrocketed to the hundreds and it taught me how to write out my visions! I discovered that I communicate best through writing! I've been heavily committed to a creative writing portfolio to re-discover my passion for storytelling and the reason i've been going to so many plays and movies is to feed my muse and I feel extremely inspired and so much happier and fully alive and in a flow state. By applying my new mindset of "I am free to create my life" I changed my GPA radically by applying new academic techniques after a bad semester. However, this creator mindset is not a neurotic desire for power and control! My creator mindset gives me full freedom over my life and how I will embrace this amazing power! I've also focused on totally immersing myself in nature, in movies, in storytelling, in music, and in theater to feel oneness with my passion. 

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@Zane That's awesome. Sounds like you are doing great on your journey. Yes I believe being in the creator mindset is a good place to be at. I also strongly value freedom. That is what I'm striving for.

Day 57 and 58

Meditated for 30 minutes

Despite the current chaos in my life I am still keeping up with my daily meditation. I'm not doing well with letting go of my thoughts. I feel that I'm starting to get a little better with self-discipline and developing a stronger will power. I'm far from perfect and I do mess up a lot in my daily life. I'm still trying to organize my life and get a handle on the day to day things. I'm sure over time I will be able to clear these issues hanging over my head and set my life on the right track.


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Days 59, 60, 61, and 62

Still meditating for 30 minutes each session.

Wow, I didn't realize I haven't posted here in 4 days. I finally got my issue mostly resolved. I'm hoping that it's a done deal and that other things related to this won't pop up in the future.

My life is in a current stage of constant ups and downs. I would like life to be mundane and less chaotic for just a few months, but it seems like I won't be able to have that anytime soon. It's ironic that I have to put in a lot of work and deal with craziness for a while in order to get the free, peaceful, and mundane life I desire. I wish it was as simple as just packing up my things and getting away, but like Leo says in one of his videos, the life left behind will eventually catch up to you. So, I just need to face up to these challenges and learn how to deal with them as quickly as I can and to make sure the problem is resolved and not just bandaged up.

I would like to be able to quit my job permanently in 3 months. Nothing ever really goes as planned though, so who knows where I'll be by then.

I also just realized it is time for me to move on to the advanced stage of meditation. I haven't been doing good with letting my thoughts go, but since it has been 30 days in the 2nd stage, I feel that I should move on to the 3rd stage for now, and re-visit other stages as needed.

In the 3rd stage I will be focusing on awareness. I will also be asking myself this question: What is awareness?


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Days 63 and 64

Meditated for 30 minutes

I don't really know what it means to put awareness on awareness. That's what I'm supposed to be doing in this stage, but I don't know what that would feel like.

During meditation, I have many periods where I reflect on how I used to be and look at the events that happened in the past. This period of introspection helps me to connect the dots, and helps me to see patterns about my behavior I hadn't noticed before. For example, I get overwhelmed and frustrated easily. I start to withdraw from people when I feel trapped, powerless, and boxed in.

Overall, I'm starting to become aware of a lot of my behaviors, and I can't figure out why I do the things I do. It really does feel out of my control. I used to think people had free will. After watching Leo's video about no free will, I have been thinking about that a lot. Now I'm starting to consider that maybe we really do have no free will. It's not an easy thing to accept, and I haven't fully accepted it yet, but I'm working on it.

 


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Days 65, 66, and 67

Still on it for 30 minute sessions

I watched Leos latest video on meditation for beginners. Hearing him say that it's the single most important thing for my personal development helped me realize I'm on the right path. I have decided to commit 100% to meditating every single day for the rest of my life. I'm glad I started doing it and I've done it every single day for over 2 months now. I'm having an easier time staying grounded. I still suck at meditating, but I'm sure if I stick with it for over a year I will improve a lot.

 


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Days 68, and 69

30 minute meditation sessions

I feel like meditation has been helping to keep me grounded during hectic times. I get stressed and overwhelmed easily. I've noticed that I've been able to maintain a sense of calmness even during stressful times. I can't keep it up all the time, but I do see a noticeable difference from how I used to be

I'm glad I started meditating and I am going to continue on this path.


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Days 70, and 71

30 minute meditation sessions.

Now I'm starting to gain a lot of appreciation for meditation. I'm so glad and grateful that I stumbled onto Leo's videos and joined this community. After I get home from work, I'm usually feeling exhausted and don't feel like meditating. I do it anyways because I don't want to break this commitment. Afterwards, I am so glad I did it because it relieves some of my stress.


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30 days left to achieving your goal!!!!!!!!!

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@Zane Yes, almost there! Time flies by way too fast.

Days 72 and 73

Just went up to 35 minute sessions.

I decided to add 5 minutes to my meditation time. Gradually, 30 minutes started to feel easier so now I want to push it up little by little. I'm still really bad at meditating. I'm trying to focus on my awareness, but I can only do it for a few seconds. Most of the time my mind goes all over the place, and I start thinking about so many things.

 

 


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Days 74 and 75

35 minute meditation sessions

I decided to try just repeating "What is awareness?" in my head over and over again. I'm going to keep doing that during every meditation session until I hit the 100 day mark. After that then maybe I will have a better sense of awareness.


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@ZenBlue There's a very simple way to raise awareness. It's a technique I got from Rupert Spira. It's very simple, just notice that experience exists. No need to complicate things with any mind questions. Just notice that experience is present. That's it.

I can't find the video where I learned it, though. But I find it still works, nonetheless.

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@Extreme Z7 Thanks, I'll keep that in mind and work on noticing the experience

Day 76

35 minute meditation

Recently I have been reflecting a lot about my past. During meditation, I am able to make connections and have developed a lot of awareness over my past and how it connects to where I am now. I am noticing how messed up my mind really is and how I've been acting my entire life. It is really eye opening and I am getting a better sense of my behaviors and how that affects me and the people around me. It's incredible how much I've missed even though it was all in front of me the whole time.


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Day 77

35 minute meditation

I have been getting very side-tracked lately. I have started multiple projects even though none of them are at the level I want them to be. I realized I am creating a lot of chaos in my life by leaving so many open projects to deal with. I end up setting a lot of good projects aside when something else catches my attention. That's always been a problem of mine, and it is something I want to correct. I will use the power of awareness to correct this bad habit.

 


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