Being a male isn't enough to get a girlfriend

[brugluiz]

I had a girlfriend who loved me too much and I still live with my parents.

All that you said is bullshit. To have a girlfriend, you just need to want a girlfriend. It doesn't mean you're ready to have a relationship though.

You seem to have many limiting beliefs towards women and relationships. I don't have too much of these beliefs, but I have some limitations towards money. If I approached money the same way I approach women, I would be rich.

[Nick5050]

@Eric Tarpall

Here is what u need to get a girlfriend.

- Wanting a gf (my opinion is they occupy a lot of ur time and energy)
- Sleeping place
- mobile phone
- Some money to buy food or drinks
- Confidence
- Humor
- Be detached (not a creep or needy)
- be social

 

Edited December 7, 2018 by Nick5050

[Martin123]

@Eric Tarpall Heyy! :-) 

Some time ago I wrote this thread and I figured it might be helpful. It is true that as males we are primed to be the ones who seem that need to work so hard in so many facets of our lives to even be deemed worthy in the eyes of females, and I empathise with you totally because it is a painful process.
However it is not necessarily an invitation to turn and juged the women we so desire to be accepted and loved by, but it is an opportunity to look deeper within, to find the inner acceptance and embracement of ourselves that brings inner contentment with ourselves, and literally deletets the possibility of this dysfucntional codependent dynamic to be ever again played out in our reality. May you find this helpful. :-)
 

 

[Nick5050]

@Mikael89  i agree with you bro. It's not about what you have(money, looks...) but more about how you can make the other feel. And here comes personality into play. Women are meant to receive. More specefic if you say something she will receive it process it and give you a response based on what she is feeling at that moment. If you are so obsessed about how you look like you are not really giving anything.

[Martin123]

@Mikael89 Hey Mikael, im totally with you, hands upright in the prayer position "May Archangel Mikale reincarnate as a female, prefferably an instagram model with 30k likes on every picture, being able to live  a life of abundane and joy just by sharing her beauty with the world."

And while youre at it, since youre a dude in this life, give a read to the thread I wrote, may you find the peace and joy of your inner acceptance blossoming within.

[Martin123]

15 minutes ago, Nick5050 said:

Women are meant to receive.

Hi Nick!
I know this is gonna sound totally batshit banana insane crazy. But just for the fun of contemplation, just for the joy of knowing the limits of your absolutely outrageous fantasy.
What if men would be able to receive as well?

I know... Insane isnt it... I mean who would be the warrior, savior, provider, accomplisher, king, ruler, the self-sacrificing male.... If he learnt to receive.
What would that be like... I wonder.

[Nick5050]

7 minutes ago, Martin123 said:

What if men would be able to receive as well?

It's okay man, i like argumenting. Honestly, that is totally fine. I am myself like that. I grew up all my life with my mother and 2 sisters. But i am more talking about the attraction fase. I'm just saying that YOU have to make the move/approach and stop bitching around. And if you are not having success go next there is plenty of fish in the sea. Once you have some kind of connection with he girl you can talk about your feelings and stuff

[Martin123]

@Nick5050 Hey! Are we arguing? I didnt know so thanks for letting me know!
So what youre saying there is totally true. However being able to receive has absolutely nothing to do with bitching around and playing the victim role. 

4 minutes ago, Nick5050 said:

Once you have some kind of connection with he girl you can talk about your feelings and stuff

Thats not necessarily the best way I would go about it. You can primarily talk about feelings with yourself, and make thta a priority for yourself to meet your needs, and certainly not make it a job of your partner to meet them. While it is okay to share your emotional needs with anyone at all, we need to have the awareness that you are the primary recipient of your own needs. You are the one who fulfills your emotional needs for attention, love and affection first and foremost. 
And when time comes you can share with either a partner or friends some of your emotions, and they can help you and support you through those. But thats not the primary reason for the relationship you have with them, am I making sense?

You can only play the victim for as long as there is someone else you expect to be there for you. You can no longer be the victim, once you are the one who is always there to support you. 

 

Edited December 7, 2018 by Martin123

[Nick5050]

@Martin123 Let's say we are contemplating hehe

 

13 minutes ago, Martin123 said:

However being able to receive has absolutely nothing to do with bitching around and playing the victim role. 

I have difficulty understanding this. I have not really thought about how men or myself receive things. I'm talking more practically. Just discover for yourself how girls react to things you say/do and how does it differ from guys. Men have more power then you might think.

 

 

23 minutes ago, Martin123 said:

You are the one who fulfills your emotional needs for attention, love and affection first and foremost. 

I totally agree. I just said it because a lot of guys are seeking this support with the girl. This is how co-dependant relationships are created. I once had a 3 year relationship with a girl but the foundation came from 'being in despair'. In the beginning i was so so happy. But after a while it just doesn't work. I don't know maybe it can work for others.

[Martin123]

17 minutes ago, Nick5050 said:

I have difficulty understanding this. I have not really thought about how men or myself receive things. I'm talking more practically. Just discover for yourself how girls react to things you say/do and how does it differ from guys. Men have more power then you might think.

Just receive.

No practicality, receive your breath, receive your inner dilemmas, your pains, your emotions, receive the biggest insecurities of your inner child. Receive your own love and approval.

[Nick5050]

5 minutes ago, Martin123 said:

Just receive.

No practicality, receive your breath, receive your inner dilemmas, your pains, your emotions, receive the biggest insecurities of your inner child. Receive your own love and approval.

This is beautiful. Don't you think that this is what masculanity is? i can totally relate

[Martin123]

1 minute ago, Nick5050 said:

This is beautiful. Don't you think that this is what masculanity is? i can totally relate

Well actually the imbalanced overpowering masculine energy is the pitfall of practicality. The feminine energy is the receiving part. Feminine doesnt mean for women, feminine means receiver, artist, intuitive.

But if we all just take a step back from our masculine minds (whether we are male or female gender wise) and just allow our hearts to receive our attention, the gifts of inner transformation, creativity, renewal and innocence will start blossoming, like an ever-waiting seed, that was buried in the soil of our inner darkness, just waiting for the nourishment of our light.

[Nick5050]

@Martin123 Connection with your feminine side and translating it into the universe by giving. Being vulnerable. But keep on going. Don't let it break you. Staying positive

[Martin123]

Just now, Nick5050 said:

Don't let it break you

why not

[Nick5050]

@Martin123

3 minutes ago, Martin123 said:

why not

I was just thinking about it. Let it break you. As hard as possible. Take some time but eventually stand on your feet and keep going and try again. Life goes on. I don't think start hating women and joining these incels or MGTOW movement will do any good. This summer i was on the lowest edge possible because of this girl that i loved kept ignoring me. I was feeling so sad. I wanted to hate women. I started to read/watch these MOGTOW videos. But eventually i got over it and have learned so much. I am much stronger and better with girls now. And looking back these sad times were actually the most beautiful ones. It's hard to admit.

[Martin123]

@Nick5050 Amen.
Let life break you apart, over and over, the sands of time fill up your lungs and the heat of the sun burn you to death, and from ashes rise a new. The only thing that can ever stop this process is our fear of being broken apart. Surrender it now, and let the show begin. 
This was a great conversation, thank you.

[Nick5050]

@Martin123  True that i wish i could express myself like that. Need to do some work on it hehe

It was nice talking to you. I wish you the best