Addicted to Personal Development

[pluto]

If you are passionate about it its not an addiction, its who you are. If you are not passionate, it no longer serves you.

Simplithy

 

[Wisebaxter]

@Sockrattes

22 hours ago, Sockrattes said:

Sounds like you are looking at personal-development like a commodity. "The more you put in, the more you get out of it."

In spiral dynamics terms, this is a orange way to look at things. 

Yeah I have to say it does feel a bit like that. Maybe the issue is related to me feeling I failed at stage Orange and trying to compensate with personal development. 

[Forestluv]

On 12/1/2018 at 6:46 PM, Wisebaxter said:

Did any heavy personal shit come up for you first time? 

Nope. My first time the entire story of me got erased and my relationship to reality in the present became different. 

I have had personal stuff come up - yet they generally come during the comedown when I’m returning to the “normal” world and start reconstructing “my” life.

[Joseph Maynor]

15 hours ago, pluto said:

If you are passionate about it its not an addiction, its who you are. If you are not passionate, it no longer serves you.

Simplithy

 

Really?  Is that how it works?

Edited December 3, 2018 by Joseph Maynor

[pluto]

4 hours ago, Joseph Maynor said:

Really?  Is that how it works?

Passion is interlinked with who you are at that precise moment thus when you live and follow your highest passion you are doing the universe a huge favor by creating minimal resistance to the natural flow of creation. The less resistance present, the more you you become.

[Sockrattes]

9 hours ago, Wisebaxter said:

@Sockrattes

Yeah I have to say it does feel a bit like that. Maybe the issue is related to me feeling I failed at stage Orange and trying to compensate with personal development. 

I honestly don't think this is true.

You were doing so many different practices and now you recognise that quantity won't make you happier. This sounds like a healthy shift from orange to green to me. The existence of this thread is an indicator for that.

Just stay with the practices you like the most. That should be enough.

And you should still do the other things but only when you feel like it. Try to recognise what really helps and what is actually pathological behaviour and adjust.

[Wisebaxter]

@Sockrattes

5 hours ago, Sockrattes said:

I honestly don't think this is true.

You were doing so many different practices and now you recognise that quantity won't make you happier. This sounds like a healthy shift from orange to green to me. The existence of this thread is an indicator for that.

Just stay with the practices you like the most. That should be enough.

And you should still do the other things but only when you feel like it. Try to recognise what really helps and what is actually pathological behaviour and adjust.

Right on man! I love that. I hadn't consciously thought of it like that but now you mention it I do feel like something has shifted in me. Over the past two days I've just been sitting and resting as awareness, getting in touch with being and I've been loving it. I've had lots of great insights popping up out of the ether. I even did some self enquiry for the first time, a proper session and I can see how powerful this continued practice will be for ridding me of my ego hangups. I think what screwed me up a bit was going through all my actualized notes after watching Leo's 'learning = behaviour change' video and try to cram all of these behaviour changes into my day, about 30 of them, but like you say it wasn't exactly making me happier, it was stressing me out a bit. I don't regret it of course because it needed to happen, but the most important practices (self enquiry, visualisations, observation, do-nothing and contemplation) were being sidelined a bit. I'm coming out of my head now and into 'being.' I was procrastinating on doing this for some reason, maybe because I've been 'doing' my whole life and I transferred that to personal development. Thanks again for the keen observation

Edited December 3, 2018 by Wisebaxter

[Hellspeed]

Development of yourself is not an addiction. 

[Wisebaxter]

2 hours ago, Hellspeed said:

Development of yourself is not an addiction. 

I suppose there's a contradiction in the very idea of being addicted to personal development, which is that if it was an addiction and negatively impacting your life then it wouldn't be good personal development. The reason I made the thread was to see if anyone else had an issue with it taking over their life a bit to the point where they're not getting enough sleep. I seem to keep staying up late, reading and stuff even though I'm tired and not getting a full night's sleep. It's even taken priority over forming relationships, which again, isn't exactly good personal development. So, at the point where it starts to impact you negatively in any way it's no longer personal development I guess, more like personal abuse. 

[Hellspeed]

4 hours ago, Wisebaxter said:

I suppose there's a contradiction in the very idea of being addicted to personal development, which is that if it was an addiction and negatively impacting your life then it wouldn't be good personal development. The reason I made the thread was to see if anyone else had an issue with it taking over their life a bit to the point where they're not getting enough sleep. I seem to keep staying up late, reading and stuff even though I'm tired and not getting a full night's sleep. It's even taken priority over forming relationships, which again, isn't exactly good personal development. So, at the point where it starts to impact you negatively in any way it's no longer personal development I guess, more like personal abuse. 

Depends. Because if you are awake enough in your journey sleep is not so much of a requirement. I speak from a position when one is able to stay in a meditative state almost all the time. For me per example, many time sleep empairs me in a degree near dormant people. I have more rest in a meditative state than sleeping along a busy street per example. This is me, i know that this will sound alien to the majority here. But transcend and one will not need so much sleep. And the science is based on dormant folk, not awakened. 

[ZZZZ]

I'm very excited for your first trip. It will surely be life changing. Throw all of the theory out of the window and just be PRESENT the entire time, and you will come out with some amazing insights. Maybe even a glimpse of the Ox when you forget you're looking for him 

[Wisebaxter]

9 hours ago, Hellspeed said:

Depends. Because if you are awake enough in your journey sleep is not so much of a requirement. I speak from a position when one is able to stay in a meditative state almost all the time. For me per example, many time sleep empairs me in a degree near dormant people. I have more rest in a meditative state than sleeping along a busy street per example. This is me, i know that this will sound alien to the majority here. But transcend and one will not need so much sleep. And the science is based on dormant folk, not awakened.

@Hellspeed Yeah Sadhguru does mention this, that you need less sleep when your consciousness raises. That's so cool. Just something else for me to look forward to then. 

8 hours ago, ZZZZ said:

I'm very excited for your first trip. It will surely be life changing. Throw all of the theory out of the window and just be PRESENT the entire time, and you will come out with some amazing insights. Maybe even a glimpse of the Ox when you forget you're looking for him 

@ZZZZ Thanks buddy! Yeah it's so exciting. My LSD arrived in the post today, 4 neat little squares  I'm gonna book a hotel room for next month and go for it. I'm hoping to see a psychedelic coloured Ox with a naked Emma Watson riding on it's back, but I won't get my hopes up  'Jump on Wisebaxter! Let's go for a ride.' Haha na Just a glimpse of something Ox-like would be fine. Throw all theory out - good tip. I'll prepare by getting in touch with 'being' more. Have you done many psychedelics?

Edited December 7, 2018 by Wisebaxter

[ajasatya]

@Wisebaxter Truth can be scary and frustrating, depending on the steadiness of the mind.

Truth is not a visual effect. be careful with what you expect. don't attach yourself to any belief.

[Wisebaxter]

14 minutes ago, ajasatya said:

@Wisebaxter Truth can be scary and frustrating, depending on the steadiness of the mind.

Truth is not a visual effect. be careful with what you expect. don't attach yourself to any belief.

Thanks man. How can I prepare myself for not attaching to beliefs? Just do plenty of meditation leading up to it? 

[ajasatya]

15 minutes ago, Wisebaxter said:

Thanks man. How can I prepare myself for not attaching to beliefs? Just do plenty of meditation leading up to it? 

it usually takes a few years of meditation and self-inquiry. how long have you been doing this for?

you seem pretty anxious about it, which is an indicator of inexperience. i don't know how to actually help you at this point, since your mind is quite made up about the upcoming LSD trip. i think the best i can do is leave you the following food for thought:

any concept about your true nature is profoundly wrong.

[Sockrattes]

On 3.12.2018 at 5:16 PM, Wisebaxter said:

@Sockrattes

Right on man! I love that. I hadn't consciously thought of it like that but now you mention it I do feel like something has shifted in me. Over the past two days I've just been sitting and resting as awareness, getting in touch with being and I've been loving it. I've had lots of great insights popping up out of the ether. I even did some self enquiry for the first time, a proper session and I can see how powerful this continued practice will be for ridding me of my ego hangups. I think what screwed me up a bit was going through all my actualized notes after watching Leo's 'learning = behaviour change' video and try to cram all of these behaviour changes into my day, about 30 of them, but like you say it wasn't exactly making me happier, it was stressing me out a bit. I don't regret it of course because it needed to happen, but the most important practices (self enquiry, visualisations, observation, do-nothing and contemplation) were being sidelined a bit. I'm coming out of my head now and into 'being.' I was procrastinating on doing this for some reason, maybe because I've been 'doing' my whole life and I transferred that to personal development. Thanks again for the keen observation

You're welcome man.

 

About your acid-trip: LSD might not be dangerous for your physical or even your mental health (at least i don't know anyone with long term effects), but don't take that to lightly. It's not a nice walk in the park. When you are in it there is no escape anymore. And a trip can easily last for 12 hours. That being said, don't trip alone if its your first time. It doesn't matter how tough you are, or how much experience you have with other drugs, psychedelics are something else and it will hit you with something unexpected which can be frightening.

When i took LSD first time, my initial comment to my trip-guiding friends was "nothing in this world could have me prepared for this. This is something entirely different from what i have expected" and i'm glad you guys are here. It is amazing. No doubt. But it's not a toy either. Its medicine if you ask me. So be cautious.

[Wisebaxter]

1 hour ago, ajasatya said:

it usually takes a few years of meditation and self-inquiry. how long have you been doing this for?

you seem pretty anxious about it, which is an indicator of inexperience. i don't know how to actually help you at this point, since your mind is quite made up about the upcoming LSD trip. i think the best i can do is leave you the following food for thought:

I'm not sure what led you to believe I'm anxious. I'm very excited. Maybe a little anxious perhaps, but only a natural amount considering I'm taking a new substance. 

I've only been meditating seriously for about 3 months but I've spent years doing personal development. Oh well, into the fray as they say. 

 

1 hour ago, Sockrattes said:

About your acid-trip: LSD might not be dangerous for your physical or even your mental health (at least i don't know anyone with long term effects), but don't take that to lightly. It's not a nice walk in the park. When you are in it there is no escape anymore. And a trip can easily last for 12 hours. That being said, don't trip alone if its your first time. It doesn't matter how tough you are, or how much experience you have with other drugs, psychedelics are something else and it will hit you with something unexpected which can be frightening.

When i took LSD first time, my initial comment to my trip-guiding friends was "nothing in this world could have me prepared for this. This is something entirely different from what i have expected" and i'm glad you guys are here. It is amazing. No doubt. But it's not a toy either. Its medicine if you ask me. So be cautious.

Thanks for the cautious note. Taking the substance with someone else is out of the question as I've taken the path of the hermit and don't have anyone I can use for such a task. 

I've smoked large amounts of weed and had plenty of panic attacks and white outs from doing that so I think can handle it. You guys are making me a little nervous though, lol

[Forestluv]

True passion is a connection to your True Self.

Psychedelics will give you direct experience with nonduality. The mind will flip back to a dualistic mind state. Yet, nondual direct consciousness is a game-changer. Even when your mind flips back dual and starts to contextualize it, there will be a deeper "knowing" that you can't put into words or explain. 

[Wisebaxter]

@Serotoninluv Sounds great. I've just started a thread on preparing for this experience and asking whether I've done enough, so any hope over on that thread would be appreciated

 

[Sockrattes]

Still alive, Dude?