Is shyness a belief or a truth

[Cammy]

I'm reading the Book of not Knowing.

Briefly, It's lead me to the idea that I truly lack confidence. I have been told in the past I am shy or could act more confident (the beliefs) but when I'm a social situation I experience that I do lack confidence (body language, speech etc) therefore it is true.

Is this because the beliefs are acting on me and cloud my direct experience??

 

[Nahm]

@Cammy Maybe the lack of confidence derives from beliefs about yourself, that you know something at all about yourself, and in truth, you don’t know anything about yourself, so in dropping the beliefs, you are no longer shy, nor lacking in confidence. So maybe a good question is, when in life did you begin thinking you are shy?

[Arkandeus]

What happens is always true

So if you are shy it is true that you are shy

If you experience your shyness negatively, that is also true

If you desire to be confident, that is the truth

The truth of being shy and the truth of desiring to be confident seem contradictory but they are not

Let the energies flow in each of their creative directions

Keep being conscious of all these different truth, as you are conscious of them, they are supported and they grow, they live and they evolve, each stream of truth will keep flowing and expanding, sometimes joining together, sometimes going even further from each other, but gradually the different streams will reveal themselves to be flowing in one harmonious river

[Joseph Maynor]

Shyness can be a fear of social interaction.  In addition, shyness can also be you don't have anything in common with anybody nor want to.  Or a combination of those two.  Shyness is caused by you being socially insecure on some level.  And what you want to find is the reason for that social insecurity.  Social insecurity isn't always bad, but you need to investigate that thoroughly in your case and see what's going on there.  Take hold of that problem and don't let it go until you've gotten to the root of it.  Put it in your project binder and never take it out even if you think you're gotten it managed well.

Edited December 1, 2018 by Joseph Maynor

[Cammy]

I see contemplation is required here from all your responses. Thank you. This may take a while...

[Girzo]

Do you really lack confidence in all areas of life or just around people? Because you may simply have social anxiety and then it's the only area which is affected. In that situation saying that you truly lack confidence would be an over-statement.

[Cammy]

@Girzo Thinking on it, yes it's around people. It's not a crippling feeling only minimal and I would like to eradicate it. I need to take the time to think where it stems from.

[Charlotte]

@Cammy sorry ignore tag cammy. 

 

@Seed maybe of interest? ❤️

[Matt8800]

15 hours ago, Cammy said:

I'm reading the Book of not Knowing.

Briefly, It's lead me to the idea that I truly lack confidence. I have been told in the past I am shy or could act more confident (the beliefs) but when I'm a social situation I experience that I do lack confidence (body language, speech etc) therefore it is true.

Is this because the beliefs are acting on me and cloud my direct experience??

 

@cammy It is a hard wired genetic predisposition. Introversion and extroversion both have their strengths and weaknesses. 

Introversion can be evolved to confidence in social situations but they still drain energy as opposed to an extrovert who gets energy from social interactions.

Edited December 1, 2018 by Matt8800

[Consilience]

7 hours ago, Matt8800 said:

@cammy It is a hard wired genetic predisposition. Introversion and extroversion both have their strengths and weaknesses. 

Introversion can be evolved to confidence in social situations but they still drain energy as opposed to an extrovert who gets energy from social interactions.

From a materialist paradigm this is the case. However it isn’t that black and white once you begin to expand your awareness. 

Introversion can also be conceptualized as a belief - investigate why other people drain you, or why you’re shy? What in your direct experience of others makes you shy? Where is it stemming from really? You’ll eventually uncover that answer and can either let it go, or continue to hold it.

In Ralston’s Pursuing Concsiousness bookc he goes into the dynamics of self traits (such as shyness) in more detail. The short answer is that all character traits like shyness boil down to serving the ego in some way shape or form BUT you can work towards letting go of these traits if you can trace their roots. 

 

[mandyjw]

Everyone else is just a reflection of you, so shyness is an unwillingness to see that or face certain parts of yourself.

Often we are shy because we are afraid of being judged by other people.  Examine it further and you'll find that we really aren't afraid of what they think, we are actually afraid of what WE THINK they think about us. So we are afraid that we will have to draw the conclusion about ourselves that we are whatever negative thing they think we are. If someone mistakenly thinks you are something you know you are not, you'll laugh. If someone thinks you are something that deep down, you are really afraid that you are it will cut like a knife. 

[Leo Gura]

@Cammy It is true that you have a tendency to act shy.

But the root source causing the shyness is falsehood. You are shy because you have fear. And all fear is falsehood.

Uncovering why you are fearful in social situations will ultimately eliminate the shyness.

Fear is overcome by understanding what it is you fear, why you fear it, and facing that fear.

[Cammy]

@Consilience These are some greats questions to ask myself