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wolfywales

Why Gamble

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Hi can anyone help me to understand why it is when  I have money I can gamble it all away and feel like something is controlling me, but when the money is gone I feel refreshed and focused ?? This has ruined my life and put my family at risk. Huge changes are required and I am taking steps to correct my life - but Im seeking the answer into why I punish myself and others x Thanks in advance.

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I would advise you to have a look for gambling support networks in your area and online.

Many people have been through the same thing as you and found their way out. I'm sure they will be more than willing to help you out.

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Thankyou both for replying - really appreciate your help. Its only now that I realise there is a long road to recovery, but to be totaly honest im excited about coming out the other end and experiencing the world as it should be. Wasted 40 years - upset many loved ones etc. Live for today I guess as the past has gone and the future who knows. Cheers x

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On 9 April 2016 at 8:26 AM, wolfywales said:

Hi can anyone help me to understand why it is when  I have money I can gamble it all away and feel like something is controlling me, but when the money is gone I feel refreshed and focused ?? This has ruined my life and put my family at risk. Huge changes are required and I am taking steps to correct my life - but Im seeking the answer into why I punish myself and others x Thanks in advance.

I think initially there will have been certain triggers as there are in all addictions but by now you've probably conditioned yourself to think of that as the automatic thing to spend your money on due to habit.

Therefore I'd say that if you have this urge to spend money on gambling as soon as you get it then start looking for better things to spend it on and start forcing yourself to buy those things instead which may feel better to spend on than gambling over time (it's like trying to stop eating junk food, instead of cutting out junk food altogether it's better to replace it with something else but this takes time to get used to)

It could be on wiser things such as investment on something which appreciates in value and gives you some savings (the struggle comes in not spending this!) or put it into one of those saving accounts that you can't touch till you're retired if you're not already, also experiences such as holidays or days out to spend with people in your life, it acts as something to do as well so you don't have the time to gamble 

Finally going back to point one look into what those triggers were for starting your gambling in the first place, mindfulness also comes in handy here. Ask what kind of lifestyle did you have when you got hooked onto it, did you have a boring life or job and so you wanted to seek excitement and risk? Were there certain people that got you into it such as friends? Did you feel it was a great get away from certain issues you were dealing with? Be mindful of both your life situation at the time and the feelings you have directly before gambling and during and how it seems to satisfy you that you go chasing after that

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Thankyou Saarah. Gambling started at a very early age - not sure what the trigger was! Do you think self enquiry would be the first step to take ? 

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@wolfywales I feel you, I was gambling my life away between 2012 and 2014. My cash cow was Floyd Mayweather, however as all gamblers I hit a high and a big big low later. As you mentioned I woke up with "someone controlling me" I was on betting app before I would eat, brush teeth ect. Feel anxious all day coz you are worried about your high stake bet? I did. 

My way was which I know it may not work for everyone. Go hard or go home, cold turkey. Either always feel anxious and live the high or invest my energy in something else that would be opposite to gambling like working for free as a volunteer somewhere else. Working for free is opposite to gambling. It is an antidote to your brains wiring plus you will reap the rewards of making difference to the people. Try it, I am certain if you put all you got into volunteering the same amount of time you spend gambling- you will succeeded. Beware of 2 week withdrawal period, remind yourself it is temporary. It is a tough pit but you already out by accepting it on here, congrats!

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