question for leo.

[Nahm]

1 hour ago, traveler said:

But how does one walk down that road in the middle of the drama of everyday life? Mindfully disciplined & well practiced - no drama at all.

How long did it take for your to get through this stage? “Stages” is not helping you, neither is comparison. Practices would though.

How did it influence the people around you while you where in this stage? I sat alone & inspected. Sometimes I was overboard in-love. More funny to them at times than ‘dramatic’. 

How are you living a normal life, with problems you know is just illusionary. What is a normal life, why do you want one, and how do people get by believing problems are real? It makes everything serious and appear much more difficult. (No offense)

How do you look at your family knowing that they really don't exist, Being, love, amazement, attentive, encouraging, appreciative. A student.  Absolute freedom; in your question’s sense, I do not exist. It doesn’t matter. Nothing matters and I am filled with peace.

that you are nothing different from them, Why would I ever want to be?

while they look back at you having no clue what is going on with you? Why would I want / need them to? We are perfect already.

It's all really emotionally draining. I feel a big lump in my belly when I think these things, and that is the reason I can't eat anything. The only teacher is suffering. You’ll get practicing when you’ve had enough. Surrender the glimpse. Ease your mind.     When I was 19 my “problem” was full time college, 3 jobs, a baby on the way. Your problem, is you’re becoming enlightened?       Perspective can be your best friend.  ❤️

 

[zambize]

4 hours ago, traveler said:

The reason I say this is because of the "Dark night of the soul" thing. People talk about going through this stage for years. I can't do that. I've read about enlightenment a lot and almost everyone goes through years of hell to finally reach it and then a couple of years later go back to hell. I've already seen too much to go back, so what am I gonna do? live through this dark period until I give up on everything in my ego, including my loved ones?

No no no no no no, I've been on this journey now for a bit, and I feel so close to waking up, it's on the tip of my tongue.  Was not hell, it's full of days of ego-backlash, some bad moods, but overall it's fun and exciting.  Who doesn't love the click when something they've been trying to wrap their head around for months all of a sudden makes sense.  If you don't believe me, just put like 30 minutes of meditation a day, if anything gets too hard, stop and pick it up when you feel like it again.  I had a shroom trip Friday morning and insisted to myself that I should take a break for the day, but ended up at night watching like three hours of Moojiji videos because it's fun and interesting.  How much could you be doing that it would still be fun and interesting without you feeling like you can't live your life?  I don't know too much about "Dark night of the soul",  I think there is a certain loneliness to realizing that you are just a dream character, but at the same time instead of it being me zambize and you traveler, we are united in the fact that we are dreamers, and I think there's a beauty in that too, it's not me vs. you anymore.  You don't have to give up your loved ones, you have to give up your NEED and clinging to them.  You still get to show them all the love you want, and can make their dream as beautiful as you'd like.  You're trying to change your relationship with your thoughts and ego, not slit your ego's throat.  As far as what you should do, go hang out with your sister and act normal, be whoever you want to be, just be aware while doing so 

[traveler]

9 hours ago, purerogue said:

I went back to full ego , but there is important thing to understand that it is just experience , so you still have to get middle ground, it took me like 6 months to deal with consequences of this experience, as it shatter your reality, just take it as experience that will help you later in your life, do not let it get you depressed.

What do you mean with consequences?

[Leo Gura]

11 hours ago, traveler said:

The reason I say this is because of the "Dark night of the soul" thing. People talk about going through this stage for years. I can't do that. I've read about enlightenment a lot and almost everyone goes through years of hell to finally reach it and then a couple of years later go back to hell. I've already seen too much to go back, so what am I gonna do? live through this dark period until I give up on everything in my ego, including my loved ones?

The Dark Night does not usually last for years. That is rare. Many people don't even get a Dark Night.

When the Dark Night lasts a long time that is for people who have no theoretical foundation, no good guidance.

By watching my videos and reading the books you should be able to avoid all that.

P.S. Giving up your loved ones will be necessary regardless. All loved ones come and go. They do not last forever. Enlightenment requires you to surrender everything, but after that you come back and can appreciate it that much more.

Detachment -- counter-intuitively -- heightens your capacity to love.

[Dovahkiin]

17 hours ago, traveler said:

But how does one walk down that road in the middle of the drama of everyday life? How long did it take for your to get through this stage? How did it influence the people around you while you where in this stage? How are you living a normal life, with problems you know is just illusionary. How do you look at your family knowing that they really don't exist, that you are nothing different from them, while they look back at you having no clue what is going on with you? It's all really emotionally draining. I feel a big lump in my belly when I think these things, and that is the reason I can't eat anything. 

1) once you get into this territory it’s pretty hard to go back. Not impossible to try, but generally ‘you can’t unring the bell.’ The process has started.

 

2) DN time varies tremendously. It could be very short, and like Leo said, it’s usually only years if you don’t follow through properly. That said, not following through properly IS a risk. I’ve been in a DN-ish area for 18 months now, and despite 6 weeks of vipassana retreat time in there, I’ve lacked discipline and slacked in my practice. 

 

3) DN severity varies tremendously. A silver lining is DNs are not always horrible. Some people simply don’t have that much trouble. I’ve been able to function well professionally and decently with family despite the territory. Don’t script yourself into having a brutal time of it, and any difficulty that does come, shoot for equanimity toward it

[Dovahkiin]

@traveler also I struggled with eating as well during retreat. The monk suggested focusing less on mindfulness during meals so that I could still maintain “hunger” and not deconstruct it and starve myself. Starving yourself would drain you faster than it enlightens you. So I’d suggest to just make yourself eat!

[Hello from Russia]

8 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

The Dark Night does not usually last for years. That is rare. Many people don't even get a Dark Night.

When the Dark Night lasts a long time that is for people who have no theoretical foundation, no good guidance.

By watching my videos and reading the books you should be able to avoid all that.

P.S. Giving up your loved ones will be necessary regardless. All loved ones come and go. They do not last forever. Enlightenment requires you to surrender everything, but after that you come back and can appreciate it that much more.

Detachment -- counter-intuitively -- heightens your capacity to love.

Can confirm that. For me it only lasted for 1 week or less~. Then I found meaning in meaninglessness so to speak. Or stopped giving meaninglessness a bad frame as framing it as bad is giving it a meaning and meaning is complete fictional thing.