Big Pervasive Beliefs Like I'm Not Good Enough Or I Cant Do Anything Right

[Andrew]

How do you reprogramme HUGE limiting beliefs like I'm not good enough or I can't do anything right. All this year I have been working on increasing self esteem but lately I have been noticing everyday the hundreds of little things like forgetting to lock my bike up properly , not cracking an egg properly first time , almost walking away from the cash machine and forgetting my cash. Of course these are all tiny things to be concerned about I have bigger concerns also that I'm working on but will choose not to get into here 

Don't even get me started when it comes to my job. 

Is there something bigger going on here? it seems like when I go to complete a task any task no matter how big or small I just want the end result I don't want to think about it, do any planning or think about the steps or details involved 

Am I just being lazy ? 

[Anton Rogachevski]

What methods have you tried so far?

The first and the most powerful is self acceptance (have you seen the new video?) love and accept fully the one sitting there who's not good enough and can't do anything right. I assume you've been beating youreslf up about it and as you can see. "Yourself" doesn't like to forced just like any other person

 

Second of all I would suggest affirmations. For example:

I'm successfull

I'm doing everything right

I'm the best there is

Watch Leo's video and sit daily for 5 or 10 minutes repeating them, even outloud in front of a mirror.

Also, don't say I'm lazy it's a mentality on which one isnt taking responsibility and blaming his laziness.

Also, the thing you're saying about forgetting stuff and being out of focus, it appears like a symptom of increased mind chatter. Meditate to silence that and be focused at doing tasks 

 

Good luck, I hope to see you improving very soon!

[mgi0077]

You might be too attached to the outcome of all your personal development work..  When you depend on improving your life so such and when you work so hard trying to eradicate your limiting beliefs it winds up biting you in the ass because every little circumstance or action you take (like the ones you mentioned) that doesn't live up to your ideal image of who you want to become from doing all your personal development work, then you wind up frustrated which leads to more self-criticism and so on.  I say this because I have experienced it first hand.

[abrakamowse]

I would suggest meditation observing your thoughts. This gives you a very good practice and awareness that you are not your thoughts and it helps you to ignore them fast.

Just sit and observe your thoughts without interfering on them. With time you will notice that when you have negative thoughts you will think inmediately "that's just a thought" and it will disappear very easily. At least it happened to me, I couldn't believe how easily thoughts can be ignored and how much power we give to them.

 

http://www.swamij.com/witnessing.htm

Edited April 7, 2016 by abrakamowse

[Andrew]

Thanks for your comments and suggestions.

To provide some content and background I am meditating for 20 mins per day and practicing mindfulness even though I know trying to think about and plan for every little thing is neurotic and just plain impossible but it's just so annoying when I seem to keep banging my head up against this every day 

I'm thinking also of perhaps taking an interrogative approach asking questions , what might happen if ? in this situation what could I do differently ? what about ? 

although painful I see this as necessary part of growing 

[abrakamowse]

@Andrew  I know what you are saying, I had that problem too (and still have it). What it helped me was to know we have no free will, so it allowed me not to try to control things so much. I am more in "I have no control" mode. So I just don't think and plan too much about anything, and I am trying to plan less and less and let me guide by my intuition. hehehe...

I know is a bit scary, but I am experimenting with that.

Edited April 7, 2016 by abrakamowse

[mgi0077]

1 hour ago, Andrew said:

Thanks for your comments and suggestions.

To provide some content and background I am meditating for 20 mins per day and practicing mindfulness even though I know trying to think about and plan for every little thing is neurotic and just plain impossible but it's just so annoying when I seem to keep banging my head up against this every day 

I'm thinking also of perhaps taking an interrogative approach asking questions , what might happen if ? in this situation what could I do differently ? what about ? 

although painful I see this as necessary part of growing 

 

The work by Byron Katie can help

[Leo Gura]

Some good suggestions above.

I would suggest that as a baseline, you sit down and ask yourself, "Are those statements actually TRUE?"

Is it literally true that you are not good enough?

Is it literally true that you can't do anything right?

How can you be sure?

What do those beliefs even mean in practice?

What is reality and what is mental abstraction?

What you'll discover if you just sit down and rationally examine those beliefs, is that they are gross over-generalizations and technically false.

The reality is much less grandiose: there are some aspects of your life that you want to improve and have struggled with up to this point.

Notice how much better and more realistic that sounds.

That won't be enough to completely unwire your beliefs, because clearly your mind has supplied you with lots of evidence to back up them up. But at the very least you've stopped letting your mind get away with ridiculously sweeping statements unchallenged.

[Nic]

@Andrew

You have images of yourself in your head. These are dreams. You could have the same kind of images about your partner or the world, they are just not reality. You construct a fake reality in your head, compare this picture with the only reality there is and judge. 

So you basically do 4 mistakes. You bite into the dream of yours, you resist reality and you divide the world in good and bad by judging it. Finally you believe that your judgment about yourself is correct that of course is also a dream. 

Best thing to do, is to not bite in the dream. Remove the faith you have in those dreams by taking notice of the emotion. When you feel the negative emotion, this were you can tell yourself... I'm lying to myself right here!

 Nothing ever fits the expectations of the mind! It's a dream, wake up!

I hope it helps, Take care