What am I?

[tsuki]

1 hour ago, now is forever said:

but of course body temperature is related to body energy...if energy is awareness well then it would be also related to that. - my mom always recommends linden blossom tea to set temperature up in the body. but you can use other herbs, too. mh - maybe i‘ll have a look what they use in ayurveda.

That would be helpful, thank you.

1 hour ago, now is forever said:

(and tsuki i thought you where married? so maybe the real challenge would be only nr.3- see that’s the equation solving problem)

It's not that simple. Nr 2 and 3 are related with each other because I have a lot of free time alone.
I'll think through this and post something later on. For now, I'm going cold turkey and meditating this thing off.

[now is forever]

you are watching porn and eating snacks while watching?

i guess i didn’t want to know. is porn a metaphor - i guess i don’t really want to know that either. 

think i‘ll leave you some privacy - it’s still your journal.

[tsuki]

@now is forever Hahaha.

[tsuki]

Today I realized that I need a dream journal, but I don't think that it is well suited for forum.
I think that I will start another journal for keeping myself accountable for keeping my various addictions in check.
This one will be reserved for self-inquiry.

[now is forever]

@tsuki still not sleeping? did you find a solution for the coffee problem?

i tried to find something to heat up the body for cold weather - but except for tips like ginger tea or golden milk and herbs like pepper and cardamom i couldn’t find anything  helpful in ayurveda. still recommending to try them or try lindenblossom - it really warms you from inside.

Edited December 2, 2018 by now is forever

[tsuki]

23 hours ago, now is forever said:

did you find a solution for the coffee problem?

One week without coffee, minimal headaches (except for today). I replaced coffee with black tea and it is working fine.

23 hours ago, now is forever said:

still recommending to try them or try lindenblossom - it really warms you from inside.

I'll try tomorrow. Thank you.

[tsuki]

On 15.11.2018 at 3:40 PM, tsuki said:

What am I?

I am nothing, I know nothing.

[tsuki]

• Samadhi, Dhyana - model of enlightenment via classification of states of consciousness. Very important.
• Bodhipakkhiyādhammā - qualities associated with awakening
• Arupajhana - four final djanas, immaterial form.
• Buddhist cosmology - for context
• Visuddhimagga (Theravada), 40 meditations, Yoga sutras - for reference

Buddhist psychology:

• Anapanasati - texts
• Vitarka-vicara - (Vitarka mudra)
• Mental factors
• The mind = Citta + Manas + Vijñāna

Techniques:

• Anapanasati - breath meditation?

Oohh, this is a goldmine: Pratītyasamutpāda

Edited December 6, 2018 by tsuki

[tsuki]

Seven universal mental factors

What I mean by meaning roughly translates to Vedana (feelings in Mental factors) in Mahayana terms.

Classification of kinds of vedana roughly translates as:

1. Physical and mental (here: outer and inner)
2. With respect to meaning: positive, negative, neutral
3. With respect to senses: eye, ear, nose, tongue, body, mind (here: vision, hearing, smell, taste, motion, being)

Then, there are combinations:

1. 18 kinds: meaning and senses
2. 36 kinds: meaning and senses distinguished for laymen and monastics
3. 108 kinds: the above 36 kinds distinguished for past, present and future

Why would they enumerate such simple Cartesian products though?

Edited December 7, 2018 by tsuki
Just plain wrong.

[tsuki]

Saṃjñā - perception, cognition, conceptualization, distinguishing.

This sounds very reminiscent of what I usually think of as memory.
Buddhists approach this as the possibility of repeated recognition. Marking. Noting.
The mechanism seems to be: distinguishing characteristic features.
Woodcutter marks wood to know its kind later on.

For example: this mug is different than that mug because of its color.
The left hand is different than the right hand because it has the thumb on the other side.
I wonder whether 'location' is also included in perception?
Like: this mug and that mug are not the same mug, as they stand next to each other.

I'll have to dig into that deeper later on.

[tsuki]

Skandha - This is a goldmine. It seems like the thing I've been looking for.  

The mind = Citta + Manas + Vijñāna

Edited December 6, 2018 by tsuki

[tsuki]

Outline of Buddhism <~ That's just beautiful.

[tsuki]

It fascinates me how Buddhism builds this body of knowledge just to tear it down like that.
It's like Stoicism on steroids.

Edited December 7, 2018 by tsuki

[tsuki]

So, here is how cognition seems to work in Buddhist model:

There are 6 sense bases.
A sense base in the Buddhist model consists of two ends:

1. inner (sense organ: eye, ear, etc)
2. outer (sense object: sight, sound, etc.).

There are the following sense bases:

1. Eye and sight
2. Ear and hearing
3. Nose and smell
4. Tongue and taste
5. Body and touch
6. Manas and mental objects

Manas is one of three parts of the mind.
It's sense object is dharma, which seems to be analogous to Logos / Tao / the order of things / consistency.
Mind in Buddhism has three overlapping names:

• Manas  - the part of the mind that is responsible for volition
• Vijñāna - consciousness
• Citta - disposition / attitude / mood (to be explored yet)

Consciousness (Vijñāna) seems to be the part that 'glues' the inner and outer end of a sense base.
Each of the sense bases has its own related consciousness (eye-consciousness, ear-consciousness, etc.).
The coming-together of these three (inner and outer sense base + related consciousness) is what is called contact (Sparśa).
So, consciousness is that 'space' that transforms when we shift attention from sound to sight for example.

Contact is one of mental factors and it is a base for feeling/sensation (Vedanā).
Theravada mentions millions of them, so I'll stick to seven universal ones:

• contact (Sparśa)
• feeling/sensation (Vedanā)
• perception/discrimination/cognition (Saṃjñā)
• volition (Cetanā)
• one-pointedness (Ekaggata)
• life faculty (Jīvitindriya)
• attention (Manasikara)

From the point of view of the dependent arising, the important ones are: contact (Sparśa), feeling/sensation (Vedanā).
Feeling is our reception of the contact. It is analogous to what I've been describing as meaning in this journal.
It can be either positive, neutral, or negative. It gives rise to Saṅkhāra, which is related to volition. I'll get to that deeper later on.

Edited December 7, 2018 by tsuki

[tsuki]

Yogachara is the Mahayana school that deals with consciousness.
It identifies eight kinds of it.

[tsuki]

14 hours ago, tsuki said:

Consciousness (Vijñāna) seems to be the part that 'glues' the inner and outer end of a sense base.
Each of the sense bases has its own related consciousness (eye-consciousness, ear-consciousness, etc.).
The coming-together of these three (inner and outer sense base + related consciousness) is what is called contact (Sparśa).
So, consciousness is that 'space' that transforms when we shift attention from sound to sight for example

In this video, Thich Nhat Hanh explains consciousness (Vijñāna) as having twofold structure.
What he designates as 'the mind' is what seems to come together with the sense bases during contact.
The storehouse (ālāyavijñāna) is what retains imprints of previous experiences that condition our experience.

This whole consciousness thing still seems to me like something logically inferred and not directly experienced.
I've been trying to experience it somehow and when I shift focus away from the senses, they flicker and alternate in to each other.
For example, when I become mindful and my attention focuses on sight, I eject myself out of it and it enters sound.
Then, I try to eject myself out of that and it goes someplace else.

It is funny when I notice these moments that I've been focusing on sounds and try to observe where did sight 'go'.
Sight then reappears, and yet - something still seems to be missing. 
It's like consciousness is some kind of computational power and I don't have enough of it to perceive all of the senses at the same time.

[tsuki]

Here is a talk related to karma that explains that it is neither personal, nor collective.
Karma is related to storehouse-consciousness by seeds (Bīja).

If this talk is taken seriously, then it seems like shadow work is indeed compatible with Buddhism and is a method of raising consciousness.

---

Interesting fragment about storehouse-consciousness.
It seems to imply that it is the base form of consciousness that holds potential energy in the form of seeds (Bīja).
It is also transformed into other seven kinds of consciousness. So - there is only one kind that changes form.
It seems to be compatible with the talk in the previous video.

Edited December 8, 2018 by tsuki

[tsuki]

This is very important: Manas-vijnana

It describes the three last consciousnesses of eight and their relationships to each other.
Specifically, it describes the difference between Yogacara and Zen views on these matters.

Edited December 9, 2018 by tsuki

[tsuki]

Here's a funny thought:

When I talk with a friend, I know where to look to see where the sound is coming from.
When I read this text, the mental chatter is associated with this sight.
However, when the usual idle mind-chatter occurs: there is no place to look at that has this directionality associated with it.
I think that I think "from" the direction that is always opposite to where I look.

This is why I think that I "think from inside of my head".
Because the inside of my head is always in the opposite direction to where I look.
It is the direction of "not-that".

Edited December 10, 2018 by tsuki

[tsuki]

Yesterday I meditated in front of a mirror.
My realization was that just as animals freak out in front of it, I freak out in front of the mind.