I am enlightened. Sincere seekers: ask me anything

[cetus]

7 hours ago, seeking_brilliance said:

Oh ok great well then I do do this throughout the day, reminding the thoughts that there's no thinker. 

@seeking_brilliance Just stay on it. 

Leo said something yesterday that rings so true. To paraphrase: We are 99.99% the limited self. It's the 0.01% part of us part that wants to break free.

This is the ground where that 0.01% is found.

[graded24]

@winterknight What should i do with thoughts related to planning and deciding in work? I can dissolve them by self-inquiry but i actually need planning etc for work purposes and those thoughts are inherently around I-me and have to be kinda random and jumpy (as opposed to pointed thoughts at solving a particular problem). 

[Pilgrim]

When I do self inquiry I find it very obvious that I am not my body, not my thoughts, not my brain. It does not feel like it. I feel that "I" was given this brain and this body and that this brain sort of defines my personality. Everything "I" can do is defined by this brain, yet this does not seem to be me. I also don't feel like "I" age or anything like that. I guess I just don't truly know who or what or where this "I" is.. yet it's clear to me it's not my brain and not my body. What can I ask during self-inquiry now? I try to come up with answers who I think stays, when "I" am not my personality. Who stays? It seems it's a form of radiance that I have. People are naturally drawn to me and this is part of my true Self I believe. 

But I seem to be a bit stuck here. Can you give me a few more hints on what to specifically explore and ask? 

Edited November 24, 2018 by Pilgrim

[winterknight]

On 11/22/2018 at 3:42 PM, Preetom said:

@winterknight

Can you suggest how to nurture an intense desire for Enlightenment?

Read books about it, talk about it with others, think about it, experiment with it.

But more deeply: dedicate yourself, through therapy, expressive writing/art, and paying attention to your feelings as you imagine and act on various choices in the world, to becoming more and more honest about what you really want, and following that. The truth is you can't significantly change your desires. What you can do is honestly follow the desires you do have -- that will lead you to enlightenment the fastest way possible for you.

21 hours ago, ShugendoRa said:

Is God best description infinite? 

I don't understand. Can you rephrase?

13 hours ago, ULFBERHT said:

@winterknight what is permanent? what is satisfactory?

The Self is.

9 hours ago, Gligorije said:

@winterknight What do you think about other forms of therapy? Constructivism is the cheapest one here. 

It's ok. Could be better than nothing, depending on the therapist. Psychodynamic therapy at least should be pretty common, and many therapists have sliding scales (meaning cheaper if you earn less). And if there are psychoanalytic institutes nearby, you can call them and ask for low-fee possibilities.

48 minutes ago, graded24 said:

@winterknight What should i do with thoughts related to planning and deciding in work? I can dissolve them by self-inquiry but i actually need planning etc for work purposes and those thoughts are inherently around I-me and have to be kinda random and jumpy (as opposed to pointed thoughts at solving a particular problem). 

What this question really shows is that you haven't carried self-inquiry far enough or constantly enough. When you have really dissolved thought -- thoughts can still happen, but you will be unaffected by them. 

All this arises because you identify yourself with the "doer." Self-inquiry shows that is false.

But if you find it too difficult to do self-inquiry while working -- then for the moment, think what you need to think, but keep in mind the thought "I am not the doer of these actions. I merely appear to be."

Eventually you will be willing to let go of your attachment to the doer-identity.

7 minutes ago, Pilgrim said:

When I do self inquiry I find it very obvious that I am not my body, not my thoughts, not my brain. It does not feel like it. I feel that "I" was given this brain and this body and that this brain sort of defines my personality. Everything I can do is defined by this brain, yet this does not seem to be me. I also don't feel like "I" age or anything like that. I guess I just don't truly know who or what or where this "I" is.. yet it's clear to me it's not my brain and not my body. What can I ask during self-inquiry now? I try to come up with answers who I think stays, when "I" am not my personality. Who stays? It seems it's a form of radiance that I have. People are naturally drawn to me and this is part of my true Self I believe. 

But I seem to be a bit stuck here. Can you give me a few more hints on what to specifically explore and ask? 

Well you're already halfway there. You said: "It does not feel like it" -- and that's just right. This is not about asking an intellectual question over and over in different and more clever ways. You know that you are, right? That's not intellectual knowledge. It's not logical deduction. You simply know that you are.

So you're trying to feel that feeling and trying to "focus" on it. And in the process of trying to focus on it, you will try to see what that feeling is. And in that process, you will see what it isn't. And when you have seen good and well just what it isn't, you will recognize the nature of what it is -- and that you cannot see it, only be it.

So hold the feeling of the I and go deeper with that. It's not about asking more verbal questions. That is secondary to holding the feeling of the I and trying to "localize it" in your experience, to simply see where that knowledge of your own "I"-ness comes from, or what it is .And to keep trying with all your heart until something clicks. 

[Annoynymous]

@winterknight i have communicated with you several times in this thread, mostly with asking questions. Now i feel like i want to share some of my backgrounds with you.

I had my last profound experience in 2016 december/ 2017 january. I havent had that much meditation experience before, i wasn't even familiar with the word self inquiry.

Before that, i was suffering greatly for several months. It felt like i am finished, i have no reason to live in this world, i felt i should suicide and there is no way out from this misery. I was like a complete hell. I didn't know where i was going in my journey of life. Until something happened....

One day, something inside of me said to me to STOP. And suddenly i stopped. I noficed my thought is happening, and i am just beginning  to watch it   like a observer. It was like a movie. I realized my thoughts were not me. I felt like something very big fell upon me. It was shocking.

Then i felt something inside me guiding me to take a tour with him/her/entity. I gone along with it, and it showed me really very profound things, things that i couldn't even believe! One might ask what was those, but really, i felt like i can not describe those in words, they are so profound and complex. I saw my suffering and that entity showed me those were not even existed in the first place! Then it showed me how i  created those sufferings! Watching that,  i became really very sad, depressed. It showed me that i am a creator and how i create, things!

This period went for several days and those were so profound that i even regreted that why would i have to take food and bath because it felt like waste of time. I was eager to see those things. It finally showed me that i do not exist. It showed me happiness, sadness, depression, sexuality, guilt, shame, sweetness and many things. I felt like its just a layer and there is more to see more to dive deeper. 

After some days it went away. But i wasnt the same me i was before. I felt that i died. Literally died.

After some days of sadness, i became surprisingly happy. I felt joy in my heart. I felt fresh, even the joy was so great that one night i literally was jumping in a street with no reason. And it was giving me tremendous happiness. I thought this feeling will be always there for me. But i was wrong.

Now i want to hear from you. What do you think? What was that? What happened to me? Was it some sort of enlightenment? 

N.B - at that time as i remember now is that i didnt even know the word enlightenment and what it is.

Edited November 24, 2018 by Annoynymous

[seeking_brilliance]

@winterknight does memory exist outside of Maya, or is the correct answer: 'nothing exists outside of Maya (Maya doesn't even exist.)' 

[winterknight]

5 hours ago, Annoynymous said:

@winterknight i have communicated with you several times in this thread, mostly with asking questions. Now i feel like i want to share some of my backgrounds with you.

I had my last profound experience in 2016 december/ 2017 january. I havent had that much meditation experience before, i wasn't even familiar with the word self inquiry.

Before that, i was suffering greatly for several months. It felt like i am finished, i have no reason to live in this world, i felt i should suicide and there is no way out from this misery. I was like a complete hell. I didn't know where i was going in my journey of life. Until something happened....

One day, something inside of me said to me to STOP. And suddenly i stopped. I noficed my thought is happening, and i am just beginning  to watch it   like a observer. It was like a movie. I realized my thoughts were not me. I felt like something very big fell upon me. It was shocking.

Then i felt something inside me guiding me to take a tour with him/her/entity. I gone along with it, and it showed me really very profound things, things that i couldn't even believe! One might ask what was those, but really, i felt like i can not describe those in words, they are so profound and complex. I saw my suffering and that entity showed me those were not even existed in the first place! Then it showed me how i  created those sufferings! Watching that,  i became really very sad, depressed. It showed me that i am a creator and how i create, things!

This period went for several days and those were so profound that i even regreted that why would i have to take food and bath because it felt like waste of time. I was eager to see those things. It finally showed me that i do not exist. It showed me happiness, sadness, depression, sexuality, guilt, shame, sweetness and many things. I felt like its just a layer and there is more to see more to dive deeper. 

After some days it went away. But i wasnt the same me i was before. I felt that i died. Literally died.

After some days of sadness, i became surprisingly happy. I felt joy in my heart. I felt fresh, even the joy was so great that one night i literally was jumping in a street with no reason. And it was giving me tremendous happiness. I thought this feeling will be always there for me. But i was wrong.

Now i want to hear from you. What do you think? What was that? What happened to me? Was it some sort of enlightenment? 

N.B - at that time as i remember now is that i didnt even know the word enlightenment and what it is.

Wow, that is a pretty dramatic story. It sounds like what we could call a "mystical experience" -- you got to see a big glimpse of the Truth in an emotionally powerful way. 

4 hours ago, seeking_brilliance said:

@winterknight does memory exist outside of Maya, or is the correct answer: 'nothing exists outside of Maya (Maya doesn't even exist.)' 

The second thing. 

Edited November 24, 2018 by winterknight

[FoxFoxFox]

@winterknight 

What is your approach for achieving a dead mind? 

Is your approach for isolating the "I" thought 'inquiry and discarding thoughts'? 

If so, how difficult is it for you?

Did you notice your mind getting quieter and quieter with each successful attempt or is it still as challenging as it was in the beginning? 

Basically, is there an element of practice makes perfect in inquiry? 

[gahzito]

@winterknight I've been reading this giant thread for a couple of days now and I have 2 questions for you, I apologize in advance if they have already been answered, since I didn't read the entire thread.

1) I've been practicing self-inquiry after my Kriya Yoga practice and I just wanted some support to know if I'm getting a glimpse of the Truth yet or not, if I'm doing it right or not. I haven't done self-inquiry as you suggest yet - I'll be trying it in the following days.

What I have been mostly doing is perceiving thoughts, emotions, sensations and etc, and asking myself "who's aware of this thought/emotion/sensation?", my mind usually answers "me" and I just go meta and stay aware that something is aware of the answer "me" or of the thought/emotion/sensation. What normally happens is that I try to abide in this place - and I notice that I am aware that I'm trying to abide in this place - there's always something prior to what I'm perceiving. I think I have experienced nothingness for very short periods of time, that which cannot be described, even though it's completely paradoxical to write this haha. But what always happens is that I'm quickly back being aware of another object - my breath for instance. And then I ask myself again "who's aware of this breath?"(intuitevely sometimes or in the form of a thought) and the process begins again. As is mentoned, I feel like "I" get to this point where my awareness is in this nothingness, but just for a few seconds or so. 

Am I delusional here or maybe I'm touching the right thing? Does this seems to be a good way of doing self-inquiry and that I should just keep on going in this path, and with time I'll be able to stay more and more in this "place" or would you suggest me to take a different route?

 

2)This one is just a question that poped in my mind: can you know with 100% certainty if another human being has realized the Truth by being in their presence? Hehe just out of curiosity!

Thanks for your time! =]

 

[winterknight]

47 minutes ago, FoxFoxFox said:

@winterknight 

What is your approach for achieving a dead mind? 

Is your approach for isolating the "I" thought 'inquiry and discarding thoughts'? 

If so, how difficult is it for you?

Did you notice your mind getting quieter and quieter with each successful attempt or is it still as challenging as it was in the beginning? 

Basically, is there an element of practice makes perfect in inquiry? 

A dead mind is simply one in which the background of Self is recognized at all times -- it's just a synonym for liberation or enlightenment.

As such, my approach was basically being more and more honest about what I wanted and self-inquiry (eventually that turns into surrender). It's not really about "discarding" thoughts so much as it is about holding on to and deeply following the "I" feeling... which then leads to the dropping of all the things it seems to be, leaving in the end only what it truly is -- but no longer veiled.

Once the Self is no longer veiled, there is no more question of difficulty or effort. Difficulty and effort are only for those who identify with the mind. If the Self is not veiled, such identification is impossible.

But yes, so long as one is a seeker, there absolutely is an element of practice that makes perfect in inquiry. It does get easier.

When one resides in the Self naturally and automatically, there is no more seeker.

Thoughts per se are no longer a problem for the enlightened mind. Even if they are there, they may as well not be. Thoughts are no longer seen as thoughts but as the Self.

The mind does get progressively quieter, both for the seeker and for the "finder" -- if we accept the existence or appearance of mind. In reality, however, mind cannot be said to exist. When this truth is firmly realized, the search/seeking/effort ends. 

28 minutes ago, gahzito said:

@winterknight I've been reading this giant thread for a couple of days now and I have 2 questions for you, I apologize in advance if they have already been answered, since I didn't read the entire thread.

1) I've been practicing self-inquiry after my Kriya Yoga practice and I just wanted some support to know if I'm getting a glimpse of the Truth yet or not, if I'm doing it right or not. I haven't done self-inquiry as you suggest yet - I'll be trying it in the following days.

What I have been mostly doing is perceiving thoughts, emotions, sensations and etc, and asking myself "who's aware of this thought/emotion/sensation?", my mind usually answers "me" and I just go meta and stay aware that something is aware of the answer "me" or of the thought/emotion/sensation. What normally happens is that I try to abide in this place - and I notice that I am aware that I'm trying to abide in this place - there's always something prior to what I'm perceiving. I think I have experienced nothingness for very short periods of time, that which cannot be described, even though it's completely paradoxical to write this haha. But what always happens is that I'm quickly back being aware of another object - my breath for instance. And then I ask myself again "who's aware of this breath?"(intuitevely sometimes or in the form of a thought) and the process begins again. As is mentoned, I feel like "I" get to this point where my awareness is in this nothingness, but just for a few seconds or so. 

Am I delusional here or maybe I'm touching the right thing? Does this seems to be a good way of doing self-inquiry and that I should just keep on going in this path, and with time I'll be able to stay more and more in this "place" or would you suggest me to take a different route?

 

2)This one is just a question that poped in my mind: can you know with 100% certainty if another human being has realized the Truth by being in their presence? Hehe just out of curiosity!

Thanks for your time! =]

 

1. It sounds like it's working, you're getting glimpses, keep going.

2. You cannot, because technically humans don't realize the Truth. The Truth is that the human doesn't exist.

But the first thing you should look for in a potential teacher you meet in person is whether you feel peace in their presence.

Edited November 24, 2018 by winterknight

[FoxFoxFox]

@winterknight Thank you. Most valuable. 

[FoxFoxFox]

@winterknight When inquiry is made into the source of "I" it is nowhere to be found. There is also the realization that the "I" is simply another label put on phenomena. So it itself is an illusion. At this point, the realization dawns that nothing can be said about enlightenment. There is no longer a seeker, neither is there seeking, because those are also concepts. So the only thing that seems appropriate is silence. Additionally, the worldly functions which were previously thought as being the actions of the "I" are seen to be autonomous, entirely out of the control of a "driver" who drives the body.

Is this the "state" the texts and the sages refer to as Sat? Is this enlightenment? 

[Annoynymous]

@winterknight and this is part 2. After the mystical experience, i felt calmness in my mind. I don't know when was the last time i experienced that much calmness in my mind. I felt awesome and could do complex thinking. I lost the concept of time. I was looking at my feeling. I felt extreme clarity and could connect with people more well. I thought abougt some social matters and came up with some radical thoughts that blowed even myself. I thought marriagr is a flawed thing, anyone can be connected with anyone, without any convention, even sexually. Basically i was not seeing any boundary. Social boundaries and convention meant nothing to me. I was feeling energy. I thought everything was energy. Various kinds of energy. I was focusing on creating positive energy.

I think after a certain point, i was getting over confident. I tried somwthing new this time and with another person. I wanted to bring her out of something that i felt was wrong and i thought it will be nice i pull her out of it. In that work i was comperatively successful to some extend. After that i began to experience fog in my mind and i felt i am becoming neurotic and anxious and that profound mystical feeling left me. I was in blunder. And my work with that girl began to fail. After some months i discovered myself in failure. I couldn't do what i wanted to do. I felt miserable, more than i was before. I couldnt take the blow and fell right on the ground. I became frustrated anxious depressed lonely fearful.

I was deeply seeking that mystical experience but couldnt access it. I believed if i could have that experience again, i will feel good again. I also felt that experience proved not to be enough. Right now i feel guilty. I thought i could uplift someone else's consciousness but it turned out that i myself was not even conscious enough. 

What do you have got to say?

N.B- i deliberately left out my personal story untold. I don't feel comfortable telling here. If you have time and patience to hear, i can PM you.  

[winterknight]

30 minutes ago, FoxFoxFox said:

@winterknight When inquiry is made into the source of "I" it is nowhere to be found. There is also the realization that the "I" is simply another label put on phenomena. So it itself is an illusion. At this point, the realization dawns that nothing can be said about enlightenment. There is no longer a seeker, neither is there seeking, because those are also concepts. So the only thing that seems appropriate is silence. Additionally, the worldly functions which were previously thought as being the actions of the "I" are seen to be autonomous, entirely out of the control of a "driver" who drives the body.

Is this the "state" the texts and the sages refer to as Sat? Is this enlightenment? 

Not quite, I'd say. See, the "I" is usually used falsely but it has a core of truth in it. That truth is just usually obscured. The search for the I does not simply terminate in the idea that the I is a mere label; it has to terminate in the recognition of the true I, whose nature is perfection, peace, and existence beyond time and space.

That starts with inquiry; inquiry leads to glimpses -- peaceful moments of time in which the Self is touched on, but the prior mental habits draw you back. So it is practiced over and over and over again until finally something "clicks" and what seemed to be a temporary glimpse or state of mind is understood to be simply the permanent unchanging Reality, and the former notion of body/mind is seen to be an illusion.

Without the recognition of the constant perfect effortless peace that one Is, one cannot be said to be done.

21 minutes ago, Annoynymous said:

@winterknight and this is part 2. After the mystical experience, i felt calmness in my mind. I don't know when was the last time i experienced that much calmness in my mind. I felt awesome and could do complex thinking. I lost the concept of time. I was looking at my feeling. I felt extreme clarity and could connect with people more well. I thought abougt some social matters and came up with some radical thoughts that blowed even myself. I thought marriagr is a flawed thing, anyone can be connected with anyone, without any convention, even sexually. Basically i was not seeing any boundary. Social boundaries and convention meant nothing to me. I was feeling energy. I thought everything was energy. Various kinds of energy. I was focusing on creating positive energy.

I think after a certain point, i was getting over confident. I tried somwthing new this time and with another person. I wanted to bring her out of something that i felt was wrong and i thought it will be nice i pull her out of it. In that work i was comperatively successful to some extend. After that i began to experience fog in my mind and i felt i am becoming neurotic and anxious and that profound mystical feeling left me. I was in blunder. And my work with that girl began to fail. After some months i discovered myself in failure. I couldn't do what i wanted to do. I felt miserable, more than i was before. I couldnt take the blow and fell right on the ground. I became frustrated anxious depressed lonely fearful.

I was deeply seeking that mystical experience but couldnt access it. I believed if i could have that experience again, i will feel good again. I also felt that experience proved not to be enough. Right now i feel guilty. I thought i could uplift someone else's consciousness but it turned out that i myself was not even conscious enough. 

What do you have got to say?

N.B- i deliberately left out my personal story untold. I don't feel comfortable telling here. If you have time and patience to hear, i can PM you.  

Yes, it sounds like you had a glimpse of the Truth and were drawn back by the messy emotional complexities of a relationship.

It doesn't really change anything I've said in the past. You have to deal with your emotional issues... preferably through therapy, but if you cannot or will not do that, then through extensive writing about your emotions -- like you are doing here, but you can write just for yourself, a lot of reading of spiritual and psychological texts, a lot of discussion, breathing exercises & mantra chanting if that helps, prayer if it helps, a lot of thinking and effort and work to understand yourself.

Edited November 24, 2018 by winterknight

[Annoynymous]

@winterknight i am trying to do many things to emotionally venting myself but it is taking time. Still i am not out of suffering fully as i had to see that girl as we attend same cls and i can not skip my graduation. I don't know how much time it will take to fully recover.

 

[gahzito]

@winterknight thanks so much for your time and answers! =]

I'll definitely keep on going!!! 

[EvilAngel]

Hello winterknight. 

2 weeks ago I had an enlightenment experience. I was watching Leo's video "spiritual enlightenment - the most shocking truth" and I was looking at "my" hands and realised there was no "me" there...the hands weren't "me" and whatever was looking through my eyes was not "me". I just started laughing at this realisation. It was quite profound. I spent about 10 days in a peaceful state...I had become nothing and everything, and the whole world had changed. One night I was out, and I was looking into everyone's eyes, and I only saw mySelf. Not the old me, but God. I felt like I had completely surrendered, and spent hours lying on my couch just watching my effortless breathing. When I went to sleep at night I would go straight into deep sleep and was rested after only a few hours. Any suffering was inconsequential as there was no "me" to experience suffering. I could spend days alone and not experience loneliness.

However things have changed in the last few days. I am starting to feel lonely again. I am suffering. My depression is coming back. I am sleeping for 12 hours straight, and not even feeling properly refreshed when I wake.

Can you explain to me what has happened? And can you suggest a next step for me?

[winterknight]

12 minutes ago, EvilAngel said:

Hello winterknight. 

2 weeks ago I had an enlightenment experience. I was watching Leo's video "spiritual enlightenment - the most shocking truth" and I was looking at "my" hands and realised there was no "me" there...the hands weren't "me" and whatever was looking through my eyes was not "me". I just started laughing at this realisation. It was quite profound. I spent about 10 days in a peaceful state...I had become nothing and everything, and the whole world had changed. One night I was out, and I was looking into everyone's eyes, and I only saw mySelf. Not the old me, but God. I felt like I had completely surrendered, and spent hours lying on my couch just watching my effortless breathing. When I went to sleep at night I would go straight into deep sleep and was rested after only a few hours. Any suffering was inconsequential as there was no "me" to experience suffering. I could spend days alone and not experience loneliness.

However things have changed in the last few days. I am starting to feel lonely again. I am suffering. My depression is coming back. I am sleeping for 12 hours straight, and not even feeling properly refreshed when I wake.

Can you explain to me what has happened? And can you suggest a next step for me?

Yes, you had a glimpse of the Truth. It happened effortlessly and by grace.

But because it happened that way, your prior mental habits sucked you right back into the old perspective.

So if you want to get back there permanently, it's time to put in effort.

Get in touch with your true desires and perform intense self-inquiry.

[FoxFoxFox]

@winterknight Yes, It clicked. All I can say is that this is much more profound than I could ever imagine yet was always present. As if I just chose to not see it. Peace, gentle joy, no I. I am not the body, not the mind, not anything and simultaneously everything.

[tenta]

If suffering is an illusion, that must mean consciousness is also an illusion, right?