-- Finally someone is speaking about it --

[billiesimon]

I'm really grateful for Teal to release this very neglected insight about male dichotomy and suffering. 
So honorable and heartwarming for a woman to talk about this. Watch it!

By the way, I don't resonate at all with the traditional side, but I agree with the sense of "helplessness" that traditional men feel today in society, since it's very confusing to be a man nowadays.

[aurum]

@billiesimon

Yeah she did a very good job with this, props to her. For anyone who liked this, I would read Iron John by Robert Bly.

[billiesimon]

12 hours ago, aurum said:

@billiesimon

Yeah she did a very good job with this, props to her. For anyone who liked this, I would read Iron John by Robert Bly.

It's a great video. But in the "actualized" man part (which I loved) the only thing that I didn't like was having to defend women.

It makes no sense. Women should take responsibility for themselves and stop depending on men.

I'll look into that book, thanks bro.

Edited November 4, 2018 by billiesimon

[aurum]

5 hours ago, billiesimon said:

It makes no sense. Women should take responsibility for themselves and stop depending on men.

I don't think that aspect was suggesting women go back to being helpless victims. There can be a shadow side of dependency.

Rather, it's about how the masculine and feminine energies manifest themselves.

I love being a leader. When I'm owning a situation, it just feels so right. It's like I'm home. Because I know good things are going to happen for everyone around me.

Most guys would agree with that. But if you were to honestly ask most women how they feel about being a leader and having to take charge, you would get much different responses. It doesn't feel right to them.

This doesn't mean some girl can't go channel her inner Khaleesi if she wants. It's a free will universe, and some women undoubtedly are more masculine than others. But in my experience they typically don't enjoy it the same way men do.

When I'm in a long term relationship with a girl, I love when she tells me things like "You make me feel safe". There's just something about that which strikes at the core of what it means to be a man. And when she feels safe, that's when her femininity opens up and she gets to feel like a woman.

[billiesimon]

1 hour ago, aurum said:

I don't think that aspect was suggesting women go back to being helpless victims. There can be a shadow side of dependency.

Rather, it's about how the masculine and feminine energies manifest themselves.

I love being a leader. When I'm owning a situation, it just feels so right. It's like I'm home. Because I know good things are going to happen for everyone around me.

Most guys would agree with that. But if you were to honestly ask most women how they feel about being a leader and having to take charge, you would get much different responses. It doesn't feel right to them.

This doesn't mean some girl can't go channel her inner Khaleesi if she wants. It's a free will universe, and some women undoubtedly are more masculine than others. But in my experience they typically don't enjoy it the same way men do.

When I'm in a long term relationship with a girl, I love when she tells me things like "You make me feel safe". There's just something about that which strikes at the core of what it means to be a man. And when she feels safe, that's when her femininity opens up and she gets to feel like a woman.

I agree with generally everything, yeah.

[XYZ]

On 11/4/2018 at 5:36 AM, billiesimon said:

It's a great video. But in the "actualized" man part (which I loved) the only thing that I didn't like was having to defend women.

It makes no sense. Women should take responsibility for themselves and stop depending on men.

I'll look into that book, thanks bro.

Haven't listened yet, thanks for the 'forewarning' that it will come up.

A mantra I have is that my own health, safety and comfort is just as important as that of any female. And this has always been how I felt, putting myself in harms way to protect a women never felt natural. Then again, I was never typically masculine to begin with, and being the self-sacrificing protector, provider and leader might come part and parcel with strong masculine polarity.

From my point of view chivalry is like a code-world for male disposability. I will expect women to pull their own weight, literally and figuratively. 

On 11/4/2018 at 11:22 AM, aurum said:

I don't think that aspect was suggesting women go back to being helpless victims. There can be a shadow side of dependency.

Rather, it's about how the masculine and feminine energies manifest themselves.

I love being a leader. When I'm owning a situation, it just feels so right. It's like I'm home. Because I know good things are going to happen for everyone around me.

Most guys would agree with that. But if you were to honestly ask most women how they feel about being a leader and having to take charge, you would get much different responses. It doesn't feel right to them.

This doesn't mean some girl can't go channel her inner Khaleesi if she wants. It's a free will universe, and some women undoubtedly are more masculine than others. But in my experience they typically don't enjoy it the same way men do.

When I'm in a long term relationship with a girl, I love when she tells me things like "You make me feel safe". There's just something about that which strikes at the core of what it means to be a man. And when she feels safe, that's when her femininity opens up and she gets to feel like a woman.

This resonates with what I read in Way of the Superior Man, and what you posted in my thread asking about femdom relationships. Despite other posters inevitably chiming in to point out that sexual polarity is relative and very fluid, I clearly observe that the essence of masculinity involves those qualities mentioned in the book, like being the leader and protector. I can feel this dynamic when I see couples out together, I see them man as like her personal bodyguard/attack dog, it manifests through is facial expressions and body language and the way they walk together.

So I can understand that what I interpret as "male disposability" other men would feel as being their highest selves. It's also evident to me that my personality is unusually more feminine for a man, and even if I wanted to be masculine, I don't have any qualities that make women feel safe. I'm unwilling and unable to protect women from other people. 

Having feminine energy though allows me to become more balanced, which makes it easier to cope with being alone when my masculine-feminine can compliment itself. My goal is not to become more masculine, nor more feminine, but to better understand my sexual essence. Since mission/purpose is strongly associated with the masculine according to David Deida, and Leo said similarly in his interview with a dating coach once, I have a strong suspicion that my struggle to commit to any purpose is very related to my lack of masculine identity.

I'd better listen to the rest of the video before revisiting the thread again.