Do we have control on something

[Strikr]

Am I even in control of my mind ?

Am I in control of the shape of my life ?

Are my thought created by me or by an external things ?

isn't direct experience still an idea from the mind ?

Edited November 1, 2018 by Strikr

[Nahm]

@Strikr There is nothing to control, nothing which could control you. There is no external.  We get to thinkin, that’s all, but just let it go, just let it all go. Breathe, relax, let it go. It will pass. The body is infinitely intelligent, and it will do it’s thing, perfectly, just let go. ❤️ This will pass, and IT WILL RETURN, stronger, clearer, infinitely better, than before. 

[Strikr]

no no

I m saying, what's left now, if there is nothing to control.

what's the point of getting out of bed ? what's the point to anything ? what's the point of being ?

if there is nothing to control, there is nothing to build.

do I just have to cry, laugh, and do all the mondain things like being ?

The only thought of having nothing to deal with makes me neutral sad.

is being the end ? what's left to discover ? what's left to create ?  is it borringness that his left ?

I wasn't into this work for not suffering, I was here to improve.. now that I see there is nothing to improve, what's left inside me ?

what do I live for ? I have no free will at all ? nothing I think or do is my product ?

acting on fear or acting on love, it's all over control of the universe, there is nothing for me to choose ? 

 

 

Edited November 1, 2018 by Strikr

[Torkys]

@Strikr Assuming you don't control anything, you don't control whether you have the motivation to get up in the morning, you don't control your emotions nor your mind. You feeling a bit depressed is inevitable then, it's not your choice, there is nothing to do about it. It's a cosmic play. 

Btw, have you ever chose to fall in love? 

Have you ever chose to have a fear? 

Have you chose to read this? 

What makes you believe that you ever had control or that you never had it in the first place? 

[Strikr]

12 minutes ago, Torkys said:

@Strikr Assuming you don't control anything, you don't control whether you have the motivation to get up in the morning, you don't control your emotions nor your mind. You feeling a bit depressed is inevitable then, it's not your choice, there is nothing to do about it. It's a cosmic play. 

Btw, have you ever chose to fall in love? 

Have you ever chose to have a fear? 

Have you chose to read this? 

What makes you believe that you ever had control or that you never had it in the first place? 

nothing change, but everything change to "me".

I feel like a dream walker. Everyday looks like a dream now, every morning it's almost as if, ho yeh I m still here.

fuck I was almost happy being asleep, now I can see that.

Everything in my life resonate different now, all thought etc.. it's like my mind is rebuilding himself

I aswell have this "kundalini" / energy thing. It's aswell a product of my mind / body ? what's this ?

 

Edited November 1, 2018 by Strikr

[Shin]

12 minutes ago, Torkys said:

@Strikr Assuming you don't control anything, you don't control whether you have the motivation to get up in the morning, you don't control your emotions nor your mind. You feeling a bit depressed is inevitable then, it's not your choice, there is nothing to do about it. It's a cosmic play. 

Btw, have you ever chose to fall in love? 

Have you ever chose to have a fear? 

Have you chose to read this? 

What makes you believe that you ever had control or that you never had it in the first place? 

So hard to accept ?

[Strikr]

2 minutes ago, Shin said:

So hard to accept ?

Yes but I don't like being borred, that's probably even worst than living war for me.

Maybe I'll choose war, if there no choice, but as I have no choice, even further self actualization will not be my choice apparently.

what's the point then for you to post on this forum then, just playing, doing your bird thing ?

what if you're "wrong" about humans being as a part of nature, and we are the hand writter.

what's the point to awaken people ? nothing ? why do you keep fucking posting if you believe in pure nothing ?

 

[Jack River]

56 minutes ago, Strikr said:

acting on fear or acting on love, it's all over control of the universe, there is nothing for me to choose ? 

 

You don’t act on love dude. Love is its own action. Love doesn’t choose. Love is action and that action needs no motive. 

If we needs a “thing” to get us up int the morning our life is influenced by fear/psychological time. And that means we have appointed the self as being more than just a function. Thought has then became the master. 

Love/truth or what is is the ground and thought is only a function. Truth/love doesn’t need a thing to get up everyday, only the confused self/ego/fear does. 

Edited November 1, 2018 by Jack River

[Shin]

25 minutes ago, Shin said:

So hard to accept ?

12 minutes ago, Strikr said:

 

 

Oh wait ...

... I don't control that either ???

[Strikr]

1 minute ago, Jack River said:

You don’t act on love dude. Love is its own action. Love doesn’t choose. Love is action and that action needs no motive. 

If we needs a “thing” to get us up int the morning our life is influenced by fear/psychological time. And that means we have appointed the self as being more than just a function. Thought has then became the master. 

Love/truth or what is is ground and thought is only a function. Truth/love doesn’t need a thing to get up everyday, only the confused self/ego/fear does. 

What if I "awaken", but I m not like all of you, you all presume there is a way and a "end" and a "path", we all know it's "infinite"

 

and you believe I m in my ego/mind. I wouldn't presume such things if my spine wasn't weird and that I feel pretty good all day. ( neutral good, no real thought or "problems" only if I "create them, like right now )

that's not even placebo. I feel good/bad it's hell and paradise, it's a dream state.

 

I m just playing right now, I m not even sure someone here can provide me with anything, cause I get it, it's all "about me" ( without being egoic in this sentence )

 

I have a pure diet that I follow through intuit, and I m doing body push up everyday now, I like to suffer even more now to contrast something, maybe there is still piece to work on, I hope so, I need it.

 

it's not like I want to be strong or something like this, I didn't choose to "awaken/kundalini"

it's like I fucking need it now to upgrade myself, like a bird need to fucking plane, I need to suffer more now for whatever reason.

[Jack River]

4 minutes ago, Strikr said:

What if I "awaken", but I m not like all of you, you all presume there is a way and a "end" and a "path", we all know it's "infinite"

There is no end, and there is no path. 

 

6 minutes ago, Strikr said:

I m just playing right now, I m not even sure someone here can provide me with anything, cause I get it, it's all "about me" ( without being egoic in this sentence )

 

Yep. The thing is knowing isn’t the point. Psychological time still moves even with knowing. If that time stops then it’s all so simple. 

 

8 minutes ago, Strikr said:

it's like I fucking need it now to upgrade myself, like a bird need to fucking plane, I need to suffer more now for whatever reason.

Not getting what you’re saying here brah.

[Strikr]

11 minutes ago, Jack River said:

There is no end, and there is no path. 

 

Yep. The thing is knowing isn’t the point. Psychological time still moves even with knowing. If that time stops then it’s all so simple. 

 

Not getting what you’re saying here brah.

I don't see the point in talking with everyone, I m still confuse why I did even create this shit topic.

 

All I can do is listen to music, all music, again and again and again, dancing aswell, and meditate to keep the energy and the tchat "clean". I don't see the point in thinking a lot, no more.

Speaking to people is now becoming even worst than "shitty", I feel like a permanent actor, having to play my own role.

my new "me" is :

violent music, love music, dance music, calm music, ost music, listening music all day.

and drawing drawing drawing drawing

and playing to be good with people.

or playing to even be angry, just for the fun.

Edited November 1, 2018 by Strikr

[Nahm]

@Strikr Still, everything is nothing, nothing is everything. Do nothing, and you have chosen in duality because you could have done everything. Do anything and you still have chosen in duality because you could have done nothing. A second, a decade. It doesn’t matter. Surrender, it’s all thinking. Then there is freedom. This will pass. You’ll be laughing about chemicals. But...maybe....if I generate enough thinking....then....              Nope. Still No.     Buckle in, or don’t, but it’ll pass. 

[Jack River]

6 minutes ago, Strikr said:

don't see the point in talking with everyone, I m still confuse why I did even create this shit topic.

 

Psychological time brah. You don’t need anyone here on the forum. 

 

8 minutes ago, Strikr said:

All I can do is listen to music, all music, again and again and again, dancing aswell, and meditate to keep the energy and the tchat "clean". I don't see the point in thinking a lot, no more.

I feel ya. 

[now is forever]

@Strikr that sounds not so good! did you already draw a point in your face, and look into the mirror?

[Strikr]

I think there is only one way to know it nahm.

I'll just quit the forum and let the universe speak to me.

I m already dead, but I think I have some stuff to be doing before more work, I m the only one to know it I suppose, you all try to guess what is it.

... how can I abandon something I don't know about ? what is love ? humm I should inquiry and not in my mind. Death and evil ? haha, that's where I m born baby.

maybe meditation will show me the way, "universe will show me" I don't worry that much.

"my curiosity is worry"

@now is forever : -> no :laugh:

Edited November 1, 2018 by Strikr

[Jack River]

Freedom from reaction/emotional response/assumption first dude?

These are intertwined. They really enslave us and there must be freedom to explore. 

 

 

Edited November 1, 2018 by Jack River

[Strikr]

22 minutes ago, Nahm said:

@Strikr Still, everything is nothing, nothing is everything. Do nothing, and you have chosen in duality because you could have done everything. Do anything and you still have chosen in duality because you could have done nothing. A second, a decade. It doesn’t matter. Surrender, it’s all thinking. Then there is freedom. This will pass. You’ll be laughing about chemicals. But...maybe....if I generate enough thinking....then....              Nope. Still No.     Buckle in, or don’t, but it’ll pass. 

Like drug I m doing it day per day, way better. I was inside my mind since I m 5 years old day by day, at my pace now.

I m very what you all call "conscious" and "in my body" and in "direct experience", it's still very new and I m still in my "house" with the same kind of people around me, so I m doing it my way.

the trick is for me, what destroyed my thinking though : wasn't meditation, it was exactly this : thinking too much to the point of crash. all thinking started to spiral up, and show me it was all "infinite imagination" and then.. my mind started to crash in infinitum rework.

This is why I cling more to thinking than meditation ( even If i like it a lot since this "crash" )

But I think there is still something like energy and all thinking cannot be wrong, nature cannot be wrong about "thinking", it's something powerful that is here for a reason ( or we don't have the same definition of " thinking " )

we cannot deny the thing that thinks, maybe even deny it, is a "thinking thing trick"

" proof you're all here writting through your mind with your thinking  "

 

Edited November 1, 2018 by Strikr

[now is forever]

@Strikr when did it spiral up? today?

Edited November 1, 2018 by now is forever

[Strikr]

3 minutes ago, now is forever said:

@Strikr when did it spiral up?

not sure, 30 days ago, it was really weird weeks for me, it's like I m in a new life, though "nothing change" but everything changed.

edit : ok I m done for tonight, get me on PM if you want to talk.

Edited November 1, 2018 by Strikr