Does success really take this much time, or am I generally lazy/unsuccessful?

[Aquarius]

@jjer94 Ugh you're actually right. Thanks, I really needed to hear this.  <3

But honestly I cannot allow myself to slack off. I need to work a lot on my art if I wanna become good at it, and mastery takes lots of hours, if not thousands and ten thousands of hours. I mean think of 10 year olds who already draw like masters, and they aren't rare these days. I kinda suck honestly, I'm only making sales because I'm selling my works for 2-3$. Soo... anything other than this, your advice is good but I cannot slack sorry.

[Enizeo]

15 hours ago, Aquarius said:

@jjer94 Ugh you're actually right. Thanks, I really needed to hear this.  <3

But honestly I cannot allow myself to slack off. I need to work a lot on my art if I wanna become good at it, and mastery takes lots of hours, if not thousands and ten thousands of hours. I mean think of 10 year olds who already draw like masters, and they aren't rare these days. I kinda suck honestly, I'm only making sales because I'm selling my works for 2-3$. Soo... anything other than this, your advice is good but I cannot slack sorry.

I can relate to that soo well. Discovered music much later in my life than most people, only started taking it seriously at around my 20th birthday. Right now I'm quite sure that my life purpose will be deeply connected to music (field of mastery). Yet still I constantly worry if I'm to late, if I'll ever be able to be even remotely as good as all the people I admire (and even they struggle to make a living!)

But recently I have the insight that life will unfold and is unfolding perfectly. I focus a lot more on spiritual work right now, and my happiness/satisfaction level in the present moment keeps rising and rising. I rewatched Leo's video "Awareness alone is curative" and it resonated with me so much all of a sudden. I now try to just be aware 24/7 (far from actually making it of cause, but it's getting better). At the same time I just try to drop all expectations towards myself and all guilt. Universal intelligence will guide my way, if I slack off to much, suffering will be my teacher and with awareness I shall change my behaviour.

Another related insight that I had a while ago is that struggling to make something happen/stop something from happening is often much worse than the undesired outcome. Recently had to fight to keep my flat and after a while just decided to say fuck it and find a new solution immediately felt like a huge burden had been taken from me (also was given an opportunity the next day that I was only able to take because I had dropped the flat thanks universe)

I guess what I'm trying to say is that you should never pressure yourself. Pressure is always negative motivation. Instead become very clear of what you want and let that pull you. If it doesn't pull you, that's fine too. Keep being aware. Keep reflecting what you want. Keep being in the present moment. Keep developing your insight into reality. Keep loving <3

 

Edit: If you haven't yet, read "The Path of Least Resistance". Talks a lot about the creator mindset of building the life (or whatever else) you desire. Also great for any artist obvs

Edited November 9, 2018 by Enizeo

[Aquarius]

@Enizeo That's how I was with art. I've been drawing since I was like 1 or 2 years old. And been creating digital art since I was 15. But only found out it was my passion in my mid-19 year, and I worked really hard on it up until my 20th birthday. Then I had some exams that I failed a few years ago and I decided to take care of that issue so I put my art away and only started working again since this july-august when I discovered how useful Pinterest is.

I've had highs and lows in my motivation levels, tried many different styles and types of art. Last week for example I drew 100 mandalas in 1 day (yes, one hundred - when I finished them I was feeling like crap, every bone in my back and right arm hurt and I didn't even notice but I froze to the chair I was sitting on lmao). Then maybe a month or two ago I worked on abstract lineart portraits. Right now I'm making fantasy art since it's something I feel attracted to and it also seems to sell well which is something to consider.

I could definitely use more spirituality in my life. Without it everything is just a bitter pill to swallow. I had highs and lows with spirituality as well. I didn't know any good sources that resonated with me, so I stuck with whatever life threw at me.. You could imagine I got some pretty weird fixations as most stage Green spirituality has some unclear explanations and over generalizations, leaving interpretation to each individual's imagination.. So I had a love-hate relationship with spirituality. It gave me hope and power many times, but also caused tons of suffering. I feel like there aren't many people who have a clear and healthy way of approaching spirituality, but truth be told I didn't even seek it that much. I was generally satisfied with Leo's teachings, although I had moments when the way he explained things puzzled me (then some time later I got many "Aha!" moments in various situations life threw at me, then I returned for more Leo ).

I honestly don't feel like I'm pressuring myself nearly enough. Actually I'm not pressuring myself at all, I'm literally just existing lol. I mean my family provides me all that I need, I'm doing work whenever I feel like, I can easily sell some stuff when I need to but I haven't felt the need cause I have different priorities (like fine-tuning my skills before I advertise my crappy art to my audience). 

Actually thinking of it this way, I really have all that I need right now to thrive, I just didn't take the steps that were required of me in order to achieve the level of satisfaction I was craving for. And I think that's the point my friend was trying to make - I read all the materials, I have all that I need, everybody helps me, yet I struggle to make a move. Now it's all clear. I know what I have to do.   

[Rilles]