Am I stuck in stage red?

[Roch]

As a kid I got in trouble for being aggressive and stage red. I attracted a bunch of stage blue friends who kept telling me how badly behaved I was. So I felt like the whole world looked down on me. I still feel like that, so I have no friends. I’m not as aggressive as I used to be, but I still get into internet fights and stuff. I also lash out if people barge in on me and otherwise violate my boundaries. It seems like no one respects my boundaries. Probably because they look down on me. Stage blue people drive me crazy to be honest. They always stare at me and love to talk down to me. I’ve also never been one to join religions. I'm no atheist or materialist either. I despise scientism as well.  Both seem so limiting. I just have issues with rules and moralism. I know I’m also pretty selfish. So I’ve never been into charities or self-sacrifice. If I am stage red I probably need to move up, so people will stop looking down on me. 

[Roch]

24 minutes ago, Winter said:

Stop caring about which stage you are in. Personally I don't get all this stage-attributing behavior. It might be useful if you want to study self-actualization of a lot of individuals, but you as a person can deal with your behaviors one by one instead of agglomerating them all into a color-named category.

Identify the behaviors you don't like having and work to stop doing them. You want to control yourself and stop getting into fight with everyone? Just do that. Be aware of what's going on in your head as this happens. Don't overthink this, practice a lot of meditation and become aware.

"If I am stage red I probably need to move up", You always need to move up. (Not in term of color, in term of self-actualization)

I don’t really have much issues with getting into fights anymore. What I meant by moving up is that I need to move up in order for people to stop talking down to me. 

[kieranperez]

31 minutes ago, Winter said:

Stop caring about which stage you are in. Personally I don't get all this stage-attributing behavior. It might be useful if you want to study self-actualization of a lot of individuals, but you as a person can deal with your behaviors one by one instead of agglomerating them all into a color-named category.

Identify the behaviors you don't like having and work to stop doing them. You want to control yourself and stop getting into fight with everyone? Just do that. Be aware of what's going on in your head as this happens. Don't overthink this, practice a lot of meditation and become aware.

"If I am stage red I probably need to move up", You always need to move up. (Not in term of color, in term of self-actualization)

THIS

I feel like we need a post that just hammers on this point alone. I see people using Spiral Dynamics as this rigid thing. It's a useful model like Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs. People take this thing way too seriously and neurotically, trying to create this imaginary perfected character. I see all of this forum and in other YouTube videos now of people taking Spiral Dynamics way too damn seriously, talking about "embody every single stage" and all this stuff and it's like "SLOW THE FUCK DOWN MAN!" It doesn't work that way. Calm down and take this model less seriously. 

[Staples]

@Roch This sounds like low orange behaviour. Getting into ego spats is something oranges do all the time. A stage red person would be much more destructive and hurt people more than words ever could.