Self-harm tendencies during meditation

[Ampresus]

Hello everyone. I am not sure if this topic belongs here. Everytime I meditate and my body hurts in some area, I tend to literally smash my head against the wall. I tend to be agressive. My face heatens up and I just want to hit the wall with my head. Fortunately nothing bad has happened, but I am afraid that it will. Any advice?

[cetus]

@Ampresus Stop meditating till you figure out exactly what the root cause of the self destructive behavior is.

[cetus]

@Ampresus What do you practice?

[Ampresus]

2 minutes ago, cetus56 said:

What do you practice?

I actually don't even know. I try to be concious for most of the time. Everytime Leo explained what typical methods of meditation are, I forgot them. And watching the same video again for 30 min isn't my thing. I try to look objectively to my thoughts, but I have no clue how that works. Then I try just letting go of my thought, that works really well. After that I try to be present in the moment as long as possible. The methods don't go as fluent as it sounds. A lot of fantasy distractions from my mind or the body tense gets in the way. Which leads to tend me to harm myself. 

[cetus]

@Ampresus So you resort to physical punishment. You gotta back yourself out of that dead end. Don't know how you got in there but that doesn't matter from here on out. 

[Gabriel Antonio]

I agree with @cetus56

I think you need to find a way to release the built-up tension in your body. Otherwise meditation will drive you nuts. 

[cetus]

@Ampresus Here's something to meditate on. Your heart space. Where exceptance, love and compassion well up from. 

 

[Ampresus]

@cetus56 Am I supposed to feel my heart and what's around it during meditation? Or should just look up a guide for clearer information?

[PsiloPutty]

When you take 5 minutes and really remember a happy memory from your life, what do you feel? Try to re-live how you felt. Not so much the event or thing that made you feel that way, but rather just the feelings themselves. That feeling, whether it's strong or weak, is coming from your heart, and it would be good for you to sit and feel those feelings every day, even for 5 or 10 minutes.

It's not that you're trying too hard to get that feeling to stay with you, but just touching base with it and greeting it is enough to revive it inside you. If it feels like it leaves you as soon as you stand up, that's OK too.   

[Jack River]

@Ampresus people usually look for answers and don’t want to understand the problem, themselves. Understand the root of resistance and you will see how you are actually sustaining your own conflict. This for some reason isn’t communicated a lot. Good luck?

Edited October 24, 2018 by Jack River

[Ampresus]

@Jack River Thanks for the advice  

[Arkandeus]

If energy gets too excessive during meditation you can lightly tap the head with your hand, its emotional freedom technique its pretty good, or you can run cold water on your head  

To be honest if you're really conscious about how you smash your head and you do it lightly without hurting it could be your personal way of releasing energy  

It is just dangerous if its hurts during or after 

[i am I AM]

Just now, Arkandeus said:

 

To be honest if you're really conscious about how you smash your head and you do it lightly without hurting it could be your personal way of releasing energy  

Yes, it's amazing how thoughts can seem so overwhelming, so balance is important while meditating. And it seems balance is different for everyone. That's because there is something unique about each individual..even if it's only thinking they're unique, because the thought produces something different for each person at the moment thinking it. That's that shit, in a nutshell.