What to do after watching the PUA rant video?

[LeoBacca]

"Do unto others as you would have them do unto you"

This quote made me reflect a lot. I have been doing game for almost a year, I knew a lot of good friends and I've pushed my comfort zone a lot. BUT. Listening to what Leo thinks about pickup makes me feel confused. In some videos Leo refers to doing pickup and chasing vagina/partying as a waste of time in the long term. And part of me agrees with him because it's true in a sense, we should pursue our life purpose and commit to it to be really fullfilled. But part of me says that, in the end we have just one life and myself as a young male should go approaching girls on the street and master this skill before it's too late...

 

So there is way in the middle? Is my question.

There is a way of doing pickup while following the green values?(refering to spiral dynamics too)

When I am stopped by guys in the street telling me to sign for some multi-level-marketing shit that i hate, I feel guilty. BECAUSE IT IS EXACTLY WHAT I AM DOING TO GIRLS. 

And If I stop doing pickup, How do I acquire the skills to choose the mother of my children from an abundance mentality?What if then I don't know how to handle relationships because I didn't have the experience that I should have acquired before?

So what would be the answer?

Working on my life purpose and occasionally talk to some girls in a more sharing frame?(rather than thinking about taking from others)

Should I stop going out with wingmen with the sole purpose of approaching girls???

Help.

I hope you kinda understood my point.

 

[SgtPepper]

the only skill you're gonna master doing pick up is Pick up skills. You are not actually going to master having a mature relationship with a women in my opinion. That will only happen by having actually having a long-term relationship with a woman. 

How to practice talking to girls? Just find a common ground where they are at and talk with them. Are you attending a university? get into a circle with guys and girls and discuss life, listen to their point of view, exclaim your point of view, not much else to it. 

Going to parties and picking up tipsy chicks is not the same as being able to have a relationship with one person for two years and being able to keep it fresh, stoke the fire between each other, and problem-solving. 

[aurum]

@LeoBacca

It's only a waste of time if you make it a waste of time.

I have many friends who are doing pickup that I would say are wasting their time. They just get drunk, go out to the bars and maybe fuck some girl. Their lives aren't really going anywhere. They're not really on any sort of path of mastery or life purpose.

But you don't have to be like that. You can choose to make pickup part of your personal development.

Yes, pickup will get you laid and get you experience with women. If you don't have that down, that's important to handle. But it can also teach you things about letting go, being processed oriented, being proactive, how to handle rejection etc etc.

So it's up to you. Pickup is a tool, it's your intention of how you're going to use that tool that makes all the difference.

4 hours ago, LeoBacca said:

When I am stopped by guys in the street telling me to sign for some multi-level-marketing shit that i hate, I feel guilty. BECAUSE IT IS EXACTLY WHAT I AM DOING TO GIRLS. 

No, it's not what you're doing to girls. At least it shouldn't be.

Basically what you're saying is that you feel like you're taking value from girls when you approach them. And that's potentially true...if you suck at doing pickup.

When you're actually good at pickup, it's the exact opposite. You coming up and talking to them will make their night. They will love you.

 

 

2 hours ago, SgtPepper said:

You are not actually going to master having a mature relationship with a women in my opinion

I definitely agree that there are relationship specific skills that need to be developed. But you most definitely can improve your relationship by doing pickup. Because pickup will teach you about charisma and female psychology in general, which is invaluable even in a relationship.

[LeoBacca]

@aurum

Thanks for replying.

Yeah, recently I recently I tried to emulate some techniques taught by Todd. So the way he teaches is very different from Tyler for example who is more about inner game.

And maybe this brought me to focusing on taking value.

Maybe I will first rebalance my life more toward my life purpose and then come back to game using it as way of giving value istead of taking..

Also, who is your favorite instructor?

 

 

[Consept]

11 hours ago, LeoBacca said:

@aurum

Thanks for replying.

Yeah, recently I recently I tried to emulate some techniques taught by Todd. So the way he teaches is very different from Tyler for example who is more about inner game.

And maybe this brought me to focusing on taking value.

Maybe I will first rebalance my life more toward my life purpose and then come back to game using it as way of giving value istead of taking..

Also, who is your favorite instructor?

 

 

I like some of rsd and I resonate more with Tyler and Julien, mainly because I like the inner game stuff. Regardless of what you do I think it's most important to develop inwardly and game can be a great way to do that. 

[aurum]

13 hours ago, LeoBacca said:

@aurum

Thanks for replying.

Yeah, recently I recently I tried to emulate some techniques taught by Todd. So the way he teaches is very different from Tyler for example who is more about inner game.

And maybe this brought me to focusing on taking value.

Maybe I will first rebalance my life more toward my life purpose and then come back to game using it as way of giving value istead of taking..

Also, who is your favorite instructor?

Todd is good. He is more technical than other people but it's effective.

Tyler is my favorite because I relate a lot with his mindset towards things. But he's more of a spiritual teacher than a pickup teacher for me at this point.

The only guy I really learn "game" off of at this point is Luke. He is more results oriented than the other guys, which I think turns a lot of people off.