Wesley-

Loneliness

10 posts in this topic

I'm maintaining consciousness most of the time, gradually i know that most of the people around are emotional and are not thinking. 

now i can distinguish emotions and try to isolate them. i share with my friends and they don't understand. 

I want to talk to wise people, exchanging thoughts rather than superficial chatting 

I feel the emotion of loneliness after awaking, it is difficult to find co-minded people around me in life. 

Is that the process that everyone must go through? 

Edited by Wesley-

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Yes!

Slowly awakening out of a dream.

The urge to share it with others is naturally, better be silent or start writing a diary.

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@Wesley- Hi Wesley, if the presence of your friends is making you unhappy, you put the responsibly of your emotional state in their hands, on external factors.

In their presence, you believe what the voice is saying in your head, you believe that you are better than them, you have better things to do, than to listen to this bullshit. You divide the world in good and bad, you judge.

I think everyone can relate to that, but from the wise perspective, everyone is able to be happy in every moment, to see the magic in it, be able to change perspective. Every moment is absolutely perfect. In other words your happiness is not depending on your doings, but on your faculty of being able to change perspective. It's an art.

Recognise the responsibility you have to feel any emotion. You made it happen unconsciously. Changing what you'd say in the situation you are in is essential: Instead of saying "my friends are making me crazy" the shortcut, the ego,  the lie is hiding right here, say "I'm making myself crazy with my expectations about how my friends(or the world, this person) should be." This is very important! Do it 100 times a day, make a habit out of it! Wright it down as much as you can, (your ego will tell not to). Never stop doing it until you are a master at this!!!

The feeling of loneliness is also due to identification with the voice, this I personally don't have anymore. I love it in fact, I learned to embrace that. The voice always have a reason for making you want to do and change external factors. Instead of resisting loneliness, go inside of it, again change perspective at you own will, don't take the short cut, don't bite into the lie, the voice. You are perfect, and this moment is perfect, there is nothing to wish for.

 

You are most probably at stage one of awareness, you realized there is something more to us than what we hear on TV . Stage 2 is seeing, accepting that no matter what you do, the voice is still hiding in dark corners and make you still unhappy, what I'm telling you right now. The stage above is progressively being able to anticipate what the voice would normally make yourself bite into and produce the emotion you are normally having in this or that given situation. As I see it, mindfulness is being able to thank the ego for its input and being able to choose another way, a way that is making you happy, the path of love and compassion towards anything, even the thing that you dislike and the very thing that is making you dislike a lot of thing, the ego, the path of less resistance.

Your level of awareness can be measured by your level of happiness.  

Take care and have fun

Edited by Nic

Who Am I to judge? When I think I know, I don't know that I don't know.

"Things don't change when they are understood. Understanding reinforces the intellect (the ego). The seeker has to make room to the meditative state."

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@Wesley- Other than this forum, I'm alone....

NO BODY understand me. Not even my family. But it's not a matter. The matter is the path I'm walking. :)

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@Khin:) seeking understanding is just like seeking fame and money, being needy for acceptance and happiness. The fulfillment can be found internally. Nic makes a point here. :) 

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Another way to see that situation is the following :)

How lucky are we to have been on a path that recognizes our unconsciousness and the limitations of the ego? Not many humans have encountered this path.

Everyone wants happiness and to be free from suffering. This is a valid goal. Because we are all equal and the number of "others" greatly exceed my lone self, resolve to do whatever you do in order to bring benefit for others :) When you see that others arr clouded by ignorance, you might not be able to help them directly spiritually speaking as they will not be able to understand yet for some. But the very fact to reflect on the fact that they ought to be happy and free from suffering as much as you will open up great compassion for them. You will then help them according to their level of understanding. It might just be making a material gift, a smile, and that is enough at that point :)

If you base all your actions for the well being of others I guarantee you that the lonely feeling will not exist :)

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Loneliness is as essential part of living a life through the illusion of self. Anyone who hasn't seen through this illusion has that sense that they are alone. Feeling your "emotions of loneliness" isn't enough, it's only further enhancing your resolve that this "self" exists. If you really, really don't want to experience aloneness again, then you need to see through the illusion. Use your "emotions of lonliness" as your fire, the fire that makes you desperately want out of this awful and confusing mess. Then ask yourself, "who is feeling these emotions? Is there someone there that these emotions appear to?" It will change everything, so make sure you really want it. 

There's no one there, but you've gotta really push yourself harder than anything you've ever known to see it. 

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On 2.4.2016 at 10:16 AM, Henri said:

The urge to share it with others is naturally, better be silent or start writing a diary.

Great advice, @Henri. I wrote a diary every day for the first 6 months of my journey and then another 6 months once per week until a week ago when there was no urge any more to do that. It was very liberating and helpful to write everything down and brought me to a place where I don't need it any more. I don't feel alone, ever. Because I looked so deeply into it. I can just really recommend to do that.

Most people will probably come to the point in this search where they think "I have nobody to talk to about that" or "I spent so much time alone doing this" and you need some perspective to understand that. If you have it, you can never be brought down with this again.


They want reality, so I give 'em a fatal dosage.

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