LSD vs 4-AcO-DMT - Which one suits me better?

[Antonius]

My goal is to have a mystical experience and/or glimpse the Truth, but I also crave for some REAL personal growth.

I have been meditating for about 2 years now and I didn't experience very much growth so far, although I'm far better off than when I was playing video games all day. I have a much more clear conceptual understanding of enlightenment then when I first found out about it. I read about 20-30 books and I have a solid understanding of what's going on (in life in general, not just non-duality), I'm just extremely bad at embodying that knowledge.

My biggest issues are my anxiety, (maybe) depression, being too serious and analytical, socially retarded (from all the video games), suppressed sexuality (nice guy) and so on.

I actually did a 100ug LSD trip once, but it was a pretty shit set and setting. I didn't have a bad trip, but I didn't get much out of it. It was just a mindfuck. I also microdosed it about 10 times and I felt the growth potential.

Basically I'm asking this because I'm afraid LSD won't help me as much as it could because I'm so prone to anxiety and LSD is so "speedy". Maybe if I take large enough dose and it forces me to push through that fear?

I'm also afraid that 4-AcO-DMT is a weaker psychedelic and I won't get a chance of glimpsing the Truth. Psilocin sounds much more relaxed though and I think it would help me better with the "stuff".

So if anyone has experience with both of these substances, what do you think is the better option for me?

Also I'm willing to consider 5-MeO-DMT but since it's harder to get and expensive I would get a much lower number of trips out of it. How much growth potential is in becoming GOD 2-3 times? I'm just curious about the Truth, but I still have too much shit to handle to pursue it hardcore.

EDIT: And which one is better at softening the heckin' ego? I want something to pummel that motherfucker and make me not recognize myself when I look back over time.

Edited September 14, 2018 by Antonius

[Girzo]

Why not test both?

If you can only buy one then I vouch for 4-AcO-DMT, because it acts shorter and due to that is more versatile.

It's not by any means weaker or more "relaxed". It all depends on a dose.

Both are great really. It's like choosing Rolls Royce vs Bentley.

[Forestluv]

Standard psychedelics provide lots of lessons.

I've tripped about 50 times on 4-Aco-Dmt and LSD. I also did a fair amount of research. IME 4-Aco-Dmt is not a weaker psychedelic, nor is it a lesser psychedelic. I put them on the same level. (I would consider Ald-52 as a weaker psychedelic). And from what I've read, I don't have the impression that 4-Aco-Dmt is considered weaker by the psychedelic community.

IME, both 4-Aco-Dmt and LSD can be "possessive". They have the power to take over whether I like it or not. Both substances have induced anxiety within me. For me, Ald-52 and San Pedro are much gentler.

There are two schools of thought: start with a low dose and gradually work your way up. Or, start with a high dose and breakthrough. For me, the comeup before breaking through can give me anxiety (as I lose control). Yet, once I break through there is no anxiety or fear (because there is noone to have anxiety or fear). After the peak, I don't experience anxiety on the comedown (because I am regaining control).

[Leo Gura]

They are both great.

LSD is fantastic and super profound. Hard to go wrong with it.

Of course bad trips are possible with any psychedelic.

[Antonius]

I decided to go with LSD 25x 100-125ug tabs. 

It's the most well researched one and I can't go wrong with it. Even if I don't glimpse the ultimate I will probably get a lot out of ~15-20 trips (I plan to microdose a lot and try a bigger dose once or twice). 

My next question is how often should I trip? And how do I incorporate microdosing with regular tripping? 

I also work 6 days a week so my only chance to trip will be when I work in the morning and am free the next day. Also the long trip duration is not ideal since I don't live alone and I can only have solo trips in the forest which is right next to my house. There are not a lot of animals in the woods, I'm more concerned of random people taking a walk. 

[Leo Gura]

Microdosing is pretty silly. Just do proper tripping and you'll get some serious growth.

[Antonius]

@DrMobius @Leo Gura I know microdosing is not very useful for consciousness, I just want to see if it can help me to stop taking myself so seriously.