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Strikr

What is the best way to have a full spiritual breakdown without 5 MeO DmT

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So I watched a guy ( and he talks about you leo )

 

why ?

Because like LSD, I m not sure to have a spiritual experience, you see I m really a big nihilist/skeptical ( I mean, my core identity )

And finding 5 MeO DMT in France, is not a thing allowed, even basic dmt ( I never did ), maybe I'll watch for a guy a friend know about, who use the unbright internet.. but not sure he will help me.

or contemplation of death/yoga/meditation could be a best technique ? ( as I know what I aim for ) 

Edited by Strikr

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7sbw__MsJZ0

We know nothing, and even, I m not sure. a.V.e

 

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You can go VERY deep with 'traditional' psychedelics. 5MEO is the Holy Grail, but it doesn't mean that you can't arrive at the same truths using other compounds.

From my experience, LSD is more than capable of bringing you to similar places as 5MEO.

The issue is that LSD isn't selective in the types of experiences it provides you with and you may give up 12 hours of your day for an experience which was certainly profound, but still not what you were after.

If you can reliably pull yourself out of loops and trances and put your attention back to meditation or self inquiry during your trip, you should have no problem going very deep.

In any case I wish you luck!

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10 day Vipassana retreat. 

That will hopefully give you an experience and motivate you to explore for yourself. 

But why are you asking? Are you looking for an easy way out? If you are, you can forget everything about enlightenment. You’re not ready. 

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I had a ego death and melted on myself by meditating while in my room.

I don't want "enlightment" becoming a talking mindless apathic ( I don't want to be apathic, my ego don't want it, and don't want to have any experience with apathy )

 I want to be without any fear of death ( but with the will to do ) but without being solipstic.

love my suffering / not avoid it

Loving my fear or simple not be able to feel "fear" but at the same time I want to feel peace with my self ( so I have a pretty good understanding on how my  thought create reality, maybe not enough, ( does MoE will makes me think like the episode of rick & morty ( about reality creating at the same time as I walk ) or is it just an idea ( thought create "harmony" and not "CREATE" in the physical external sense ) ( do you know what I mean ? )

do you agree that there is an external game outside of the mind to interact with ? we / I  never created human, you create only the life that reflect your thought, you take the wave that his the reflection of the thought at your disposal. You never created anything, only remixed.

 

 

 

Edited by Strikr

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7sbw__MsJZ0

We know nothing, and even, I m not sure. a.V.e

 

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I live in Brazil and i don't have access to 5-MeO but i have to DMT, LSD and maybe, with much research, some mushrooms and those should be enough if you use a proper dosage, all of them can induce ego death. Maybe they aren't as potent and deep as 5-MeO but what can i do... I won't risk buying online only to get the federal police delivering it to me lol

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18 minutes ago, cirkussmile said:

10 day Vipassana retreat. 

That will hopefully give you an experience and motivate you to explore for yourself. 

But why are you asking? Are you looking for an easy way out? If you are, you can forget everything about enlightenment. You’re not ready. 

I don't want to live anything. I don't want to be enlightened like a guru, I want to be god of the external world. I don't care in capitalism, I don't care in spiritualism, I don't care in philosophism. I m a pure absurdist

You can define my "identity" by this Absurdism Existential_nihilism ( and it's not probably close, it's only described by some human who try to structure their feeling on reality ) I believe that I can create every meaning I want for my life.

I know what is the product of my past belief, I know what is a belief, a belief system, attention, awareness, conscious thought, subconscious pattern of reaction. ( fear/love )

I need to believe in stupid things only because my mind need to, to work in this physical reality.

for me my only true god is music.

 

I can't even sit for 1 hour without doing anything, yoga retreat, is probably not a thing I would be able to do. I would rather kill myself and probably never be ready to apathic mindlessness. Only to be aware that "truth" and "reality" are only construct of the thought ? yes and ? live the apathic then ? no like they said, go cut wood and live life, there is no point in enlightment, it's a groundless idea without any foundation but imagination resolving issue they can't rationalise.

If being enlightened is becoming aware that nothing as ground in reality, I m already enlightened

25 years without girlfriend and observing human like rat lab, it makes your mind above structural thinking.

 

I already have permanent insight on reality as a kid suffering from being an outcast mind. All my sense was aware when I was 7. My question was to my teacher, is the blue I m watchin the same as others ? those question I have been reflecting it before you even know in your monkey mind that they was a thing to contemplate.

God doesn't give us life to be apathic or having faith.

if so I deny this god.

Edited by Strikr

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7sbw__MsJZ0

We know nothing, and even, I m not sure. a.V.e

 

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@Strikr A lot of your replies I am seeing seem to be very emotionally charged. Angry at the universe because you are dissatisfied with who you are and how any God can intend for this or that or make you one way or another.

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19 minutes ago, Shadowraix said:

@Strikr A lot of your replies I am seeing seem to be very emotionally charged. Angry at the universe because you are dissatisfied with who you are and how any God can intend for this or that or make you one way or another.

everything is emotionnally charged, how do you define that I m more charged than you, you can't, it's you who project that I m emotionally charged because of a belief about "writting a lot" = intrinscly having a meaning of something more in your mind.

 

there is none, I just like to write, it's a constant flow. Why would god makes us play to yoga, why he couldn't just bring us intuit, what would he want us to be enlightened, a pure human delusion, there is NOTHING about enlightment, nothing. this is just a stronger new religion, the 2.0 of religion, the clean version for new mind that can't believe in the old shit.

in marketing it's call RE-branding, when the name of something has been raped by humanity emotion, they change the name to make it feel different.

deny me with more wishful delusion please, talk me about paradox, I watched the whole video of leo, I understand exactly your mindset. You're no secret to me, you're all very interesting human beings.

if everyone was enlightened, what is the end ? nothing, there is no point. 

infinity instead of god. but it's still the same pattern

why patch your mind with delusion when you suffer ? I probably know the answer deep down, I should probably find my own table.

 

I completely believe in some idea and concept of leo though, but the whole spiritual path doesn't resonate, I had believed for a time, but as a strong anti religious type of guy ( and even anti capitalist ) It will be hard for me to eat this pills. ( and I m not denying there is such a stage, why not, but to me it's not real right now )

I read occult book, I know that yoga/meditation is physically powerful and not a "lie", it bring peace in a way when you suffer. simple, don't suffer ?

 

if this is what you call a ego backslash of me, then be it, why my ego is that powerful, should I really kill all this power giving by nature ? I think I should just catalyze it, enlightment is not my LP

Edited by Strikr

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7sbw__MsJZ0

We know nothing, and even, I m not sure. a.V.e

 

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27 minutes ago, Strikr said:

I don't want to live anything. I don't want to be enlightened like a guru, I want to be god of the external world. I don't care in capitalism, I don't care in spiritualism, I don't care in philosophism. I m a pure absurdist

You can define my "identity" by this Absurdism Existential_nihilism ( and it's not probably close, it's only described by some human who try to structure their feeling on reality ) I believe that I can create every meaning I want for my life.

I know what is the product of my past belief, I know what is a belief, a belief system, attention, awareness, conscious thought, subconscious pattern of reaction. ( fear/love )

I need to believe in stupid things only because my mind need to, to work in this physical reality.

for me my only true god is music.

 

I can't even sit for 1 hour without doing anything, yoga retreat, is probably not a thing I would be able to do. I would rather kill myself and probably never be ready to apathic mindlessness. Only to be aware that "truth" and "reality" are only construct of the thought ? yes and ? live the apathic then ? no like they said, go cut wood and live life, there is no point in enlightment, it's a groundless idea without any foundation but imagination resolving issue they can't rationalise.

If being enlightened is becoming aware that nothing as ground in reality, I m already enlightened

25 years without girlfriend and observing human like rat lab, it makes your mind above structural thinking.

 

I already have permanent insight on reality as a kid suffering from being an outcast mind. All my sense was aware when I was 7. My question was to my teacher, is the blue I m watchin the same as others ? those question I have been reflecting it before you even know in your monkey mind that they was a thing to contemplate.

God doesn't give us life to be apathic or having faith.

if so I deny this god.

Your mind is not your friend. 

You have to tame your mind like an animal. 

If you already know all this why you post? I feel you only want to release your bullshit here because you can’t stand having it for yourself.

You have completely forgot your heart, my friend. The heart is the most important thing. The heart is life. Vipassana is meditation and it helps you to get in contact with your heart and start living from there instead of in your head.

Edited by cirkussmile

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it's already tame, I just unrelease his power, it's the best gift god gives me, why would I tame his own light.

 

without mind you wouldn't write right now and answer me, you wouldn't even care, this is all a proof that you don't even "reflect" like all your community like to do.

without mind there is no "ego death road", there would be no purpose to "enlight" anything. what's for ? why enlight what is already luminous ?

why bring peace on earth ? why ? did you contemplate what is moral ? what is freedom ? what is a society ? what is a dogma ? 

probably not. But I did. 

 

if you was as peaceful, as in peace, you wouldn't fucking bother posting on a forum for more "mind adds".

why bother answer me, why help me, why destroy me ? what is the point ? is it personnal ? or is it a threat of destruction of your new identity and belief system ?

I m not sayin I have the truth, I m sayin we are full of shit

Edited by Strikr

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7sbw__MsJZ0

We know nothing, and even, I m not sure. a.V.e

 

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@Strikr You can't see infinite moves ahead unlike an infinitely intelligent mind. Its really that simple.

And no I didn't attribute lots of writing to emotional charge. I attributed previous posts of yours such as

"If god created me, he is a piece of shit to curse me with "life experience". He never even give me insight about "love" in fucking 25 years, this god is full of shit, and If I m god, I m full of shit, I would never enter a game that I don't know shit about. I never loved "hardcore mode"."

You can't fathom why anything is the way it is now and so you just deny it all together. Unfortunately, every possibility includes all of the ones we decide as shitty. 

And actually I would consider modernized religions like Islam and Christianity a rebranding of nonduality corrupted. Nonduality isn't new by any means. Everything that Leo is teaching is actually written in hermetic philosophy. Something that was around during ancient Egypt eras.

To be fully enlightened would be equivalent of drawing back into the all.

 

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I m probably very poisoned at this point, but I would give it a try.

so yoga, what it can do to me at this point, kill the only thing powerful in me ?

I should accept to loose all individuality ? identity ?

but why act in reality if you are just an unconscious piece of a puzzle and that you become aware completely of being "nothing", if I don't deny your philosophy, this instant right now, you're the universe answering me.

why I should believe you, will you take away my suffering ? why would I loose my suffering, I can love it.

I don't suffer in fact, why would I ?

will you take away my energy ? will you take the external thing I love ?

why Should I die now if this is the only life "me/god" gives me. why not play fairly the game ? why tcheat ? why ask question, why getting out of a maze that isn't real ? 

give me a story of why it will increase my life. Bring ego death, ok then, what are the result ? if you tell me, NONE. So why I should pursue enlightement ?

 

if you can't put into words, then there is nothing ,everything can be put into word/concept. If you can't you just never read book in your whole life... ( I m french so this is why it's probably weird how I sentence my idea, but I m not "that stupid" ) Are all americans programmed to be simpleton ? ( and others country they are all under what you call blue, so don't even bother "reading" ) ( just an identity joke )

 

Do I m the consciousness programmed in a computer starting to be aware of himself ? is it a story that I have right now invented from identity knowledge ?

Edited by Strikr

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7sbw__MsJZ0

We know nothing, and even, I m not sure. a.V.e

 

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Sadhguru's programs


I simply am. You simply are. We are The Same One forever. Come and join The Glory. 

Those you do not forgive you fear. 

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2 minutes ago, Strikr said:

I m probably very poisoned at this point, but I would give it a try.

so yoga, what it can do to me at this point, kill the only thing powerful in me ?

I should accept to loose all individuality ? identity ?

but why act in reality if you are just an unconscious piece of a puzzle and that you become aware completely of being "nothing", if I don't deny your philosophy, this instant right now, you're the universe answering me.

why I should believe you, will you take away my suffering ? why would I loose my suffering, I can love it.

I don't suffer in fact, why would I ?

will you take away my energy ? will you take the external thing I love ?

why Should I die now if this is the only life "me/god" gives me. why not play fairly the game ? why tcheat ? why ask question, why getting out of a maze that isn't real ? 

Do I m the consciousness programmed in a computer starting to be aware of himself ? is it a story that I have right now invented from identity knowledge ?

Tricky thing. In essence of you follow the nondual path/hermetic philosophy you end up with the conclusion that everything we think and do is the product of the all big great infinite mind. Our happiness, suffering, communication, contemplation etc. We are puppets and indeed different aspects of the mind communicating with itself. We are just one out of the infinite possibilities being simulated by the mind.

The reason I think that people ultimately share and try to lead others to such ideas is because there is a lot of value in it in the sense of having answers and it can be a process in living a more loving, happy, and fulfilling life. Leo's course isn't advertised as "Learn the secrets of the universe!" but to create and build a life purpose.

All this absolute truth does really is recontextualize how you see everything. Everything is still as is. Its almost like a "the cup is half empty" "the cup is half full" idea. You take what you have and know and are shown ways to use it to meet your life purpose.

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I never attend to destroy you, I love all of you, in fact I m jealous.

but my goal is rule the world to give the hippie like you a right to live

bring peace to the entire external world

 

I never told that I was angry to be god and fulfill capitalist need.

you don't know what darkness is, so you deny is existence. But I face it. I have the courage to face it.

The darkness bring to this world should be purge, I don't believe you'll be able to live in peace if poison is all around.

You can deny all you want when you're in a safe place, a safe country, in a safe living room, writting on your safe internet.

And you mind can blind you to your own evilness.. but you're, the fact that you live makes you evil.

 

but what when the devil knock at your door, can you contemplate and accepting to see your body ripped apart ?

I wish wishful thinking was all there is to bring balance and peace. 

Should we ignore darkness ? this is what you think ?

 

Edited by Strikr

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7sbw__MsJZ0

We know nothing, and even, I m not sure. a.V.e

 

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1 minute ago, Strikr said:

I never attend to destroy you, I love all of you, in fact I m jealous.

but my goal is rule the world to give the hippie like you a right to live

bring peace to the entire external world

 

I never told that I was angry to be god and fulfill capitalist need.

you don't know what darkness is, so you deny is existence. But I face it. I have the courage to face it.

The darkness bring to this world should be purge, I don't believe you'll be able to live in peace if poison is all around.

You can deny all you want when you're in a safe place, a safe country, in a face living room, writting on your safe internet.

 

but what when the devil knock at your door, can you contemplate and accepting to see your body ripped apart ?

I wish wishful thinking was all there is to bring balance and peace. 

Should we ignore darkness ? this is what you think ?

 

Definitely not. What we perceive to be darkness and evil, all the bad in the world. It is all intended. It all serves a purpose. It takes a lot to see you and a terrorist as the same being. I don't deny the existence of darkness but completely acknowledge its existence and that its serving its function. Just as you and I am serving our functions. 

Intellectually if my body gets ripped apart I acknowledge that as all intended, but I am sure primitive instinct would kick in as I do not think I am so far to be beyond that.

Infinite possibilities all being simulated. Entirely peaceful ones? Yes. evil and everything in between ones? yeah. Is it possible to be entirely peaceful? Sure. Is it possible that will never be achieved? Certainly. We can't see that far ahead. 

Those of us that have an innate desire to spread peace and love are all intended as well.

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Why hates is so related to love though ? can you hate if you never loved ?

should you love ? should you be neutral ? can you feel love if you never feel hate ?

why love is better than hate ? isn't all human wanting to be at peace with himself ?

isn't love a human concept for talking about a feeling that never existed at all in nature ?

if feeling are real to me, is the "no feeling" of insensitive psychopath, no real ? why would some people be choose by god to be aware of "higher reality" isn't this completely egocentric ?

 


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7sbw__MsJZ0

We know nothing, and even, I m not sure. a.V.e

 

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@Strikr becoming a monk, letting go of all attachments and getting used to living without a single drop of external validation.

in other words, becoming a random nobody in the most literal way.


unborn Truth

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Be aware of attachments to beliefs on psychedelics as either good or bad. Psychedelics are just one tool. Use a diversity of tools to expand your consciousness. For me, psychedelics have been both a powerful tool and a major distraction. 

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42 minutes ago, ajasatya said:

@Strikr becoming a monk, letting go of all attachments and getting used to living without a single drop of external validation.

in other words, becoming a random nobody in the most literal way.

ok this is exactly what I don't want, I m a player, I love to play this is how god made me. my LP is probably as you can see, far from being a monk... I still have life to live, at 25 I have lived absolutely nothing but illusion and thinking matter.

I lived 40 000 hours and more in front of a computer I m probably twice disconnected from reality as "normal being", and I used it like the soma Aldous Huxley was thinking about ( beside it isn't a substance ) I used thinking to tame my feeling. We all are only feelings.

but I respect people who pursue their path and believe in it, really great people

I m just a part of this giant game puzzle, I m aware of my role, why I m here ? I still don't have my answer, but be sure I'll left every attachement to "me" when I have the answer to" why me" ?

lost in my own maze and here is probably not my road.

I'll be enlightened maybe when I'll fully embody my suffering.

Please watch all this movie, I know what is it all about. But I shouldn't have known.

Bom yeoreum gaeul gyeoul geurigo bom ( Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter... and Spring ) very spiritual movie I watched years ago. 

it's all about the journey and the circle.

But I m still probably killing my own frog, so you see there is many things I shoud live before my return.

I think I get a part of it, it's a delusion, I was thinking to find higher answer, but all there is, is the higher answer I can find in myself, delusion or not.

 

Who told you that the journey will be easy, I m a part of your own shadow

Edited by Strikr

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7sbw__MsJZ0

We know nothing, and even, I m not sure. a.V.e

 

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