I AM full of shit

[Charlotte]

Since taking just a week or so away from here I've had loads of time to introspect. 

In Leo's sameness vs difference video (work of art by the way) he says something like "ask yourself if your full of shit" this initially brought up an unsettling emotion when I on the spot contemplated it. This emotion brought to my awareness there's something to be investigated. So that's what I did. 

The conclusion, I am full of shit, seriously full of shit. I've gone vegan which has slowly been taken on as sneaky ideology, I noticed it started to merge into an identity so I've dropped that shit. It's mental how it can sneakily start to form. 

Consciousness/spirituality/personal development, yeah I've had one glimpse, yeah I get balls deep into this work and actually do the practices but that has also been taken on as an identity, when in reality, I'm a walking talking bullshitter (to myself). 

I went to a Buddhist centre and listened to some teachings from a monk, I noticed my mind even trying to find security and identity in Buddhism "should I become a monk)" constantly seeking security in something. Would you say even Buddhism is an identity? 

I have taken away but also added at the same time, it's absurd!

Let go and surrender to EVERYTHING, even here, it's all mental masterbation, brutal honesty is required.

Conclusion... I am still full of shit.

Edited August 20, 2018 by Charlotte

[Charlotte]

@K VIL Sorry dude I was referring to the time I have taken away. 

Hahahaha we certainly are ?

[Charlotte]

@Feel Good if we start a fresh everyday though feel good aren't we just adding more 'full of shit' in there? ? 

[RendHeaven]

I think it really helps to go through with the actions but to keep your mouth shut. For example, I'm starting to be a vegetarian (been a meat eater my whole life and never really had interest in changing until recently) but I've been vigilant to not run around telling people about it.

It might seem like there's no harm in sharing it with a few people, but I can tell that sharing "I'm vegetarian" is massively validation seeking, as if to say "act surprised! I need to fuel my sense of identity!"

At the same time, I'm also vigilant to not form an identity around "someone who's self sufficient without having to seek validation." This one is more broad and subconscious, it's harder to articulate.

Anyway, thought I'd share this because stuff like veganism have real value. There's nothing wrong with committing to it, the problem, as I'm sure you know, is merely attachment itself.

[Brittany]

Same here.

I recommend Vernon Howard's book "1500 Ways to Escape the Human Jungle".

I have been eating that book up lately and it has been exposing all of my shit.

[Sashaj]

Me too. Nice to see some other bullshitters in here. Love you all

[BramscoChill]

sometimes the big orchestration of shite needs to find its way out

[Charlotte]

@RendHeaven Exactly, you make an excellent point. I was the same, telling people to fuel the sense of self, "I'm vegan, I'm different, act surprised". Utter bollocks. 

Thanks for sharing you make an excellent point. 

@Brittany Oh thanks! Will definitely have a look at that, thanks very much. 

@Sashaj ? Love you two brother/sister. 

@BramscoChill ?? Certainly does! 

[Aaron p]

Love it

[Preetom]

I AM full of shit

I AM full

I AM

I

.

 

[Christer]

Hi!

 

I would advice to use this felt-perception, sit down and integrate the emotions that are arising unconditionally.

It all leads to the fundament of frustration, a frustration that leads to anger, which comes from loss of control, which again leads to fear.

When this emotion arises, it comes with content. Leave the content and go down to the very primitive sensations that rises. 

And feel your way through. The stories are to seductive, and takes your attention. 

Maybe it`ll help you with another perspective :-)

[MarkusSweden]

45 minutes ago, Outer said:

I love veganism. It's one of the best things. I love the fact that all of the cells in my body is powered by plants. I love the fact that I haven't contributed to the slaughter of cows, chickens, pigs, etc. Seeing cows is psychedelic now.

I hate the fact I have or have had an identity about it, but that's more of a had, it's diminished greatly. It's worth the benefits. But if I couldn't digest plants or I felt terrible I would not be vegan.

very good, how long have you been a vegan? 

[PsiloPutty]

I think we have to tolerate being full of shit sometimes if we are to grow. For example, I love to meditate. I've told myself that I'm a good meditator, that I enjoy it, and that it'll lead me to be a better person......all of which is mental bullshit stories that I tell myself. But without that bullshit, I wouldn't be as motivated to sit in meditation every day, and I likely would slip back into my old habits and thoughts.

Bullshit can help lead a person out of bullshit. It's like, how would a person become enlightened without doing the things that bring enlightenment about? And what would lead a person to do those things if not having a bullshit idea about needing to do those things? It's all bullshit, but some bullshit is more useful than other bullshit.   

[Strikr]

Don't take any leo word at the first degree ( depending your context ) ( especially if it trigger existential crisis )

you're no more full of shit than everyone else, we all are, it's all about discipline and not loosing the idea that we all come from a context, so respect even people who sound full of shit, not that they shouldn't be condemn for it, but is it really smart to push ideology on people ? if your ideology is BETTER, people will probably integrate it by following you, because you should be inspiring, and makes people having an internal want for change. no speech, no fact will makes them change, instead of living into proselytism, be a resonating energy

Edited August 20, 2018 by Strikr

[d0ornokey]

yes i've noticed that I've been pretending to be green. but it's out of ego. i'm not actually green. 

[Christer]

Getting more conscious also brings responsibility, and humility.

Edited August 20, 2018 by Christer

[Sashaj]

7 hours ago, PsiloPutty said:

I think we have to tolerate being full of shit sometimes if we are to grow. For example, I love to meditate. I've told myself that I'm a good meditator, that I enjoy it, and that it'll lead me to be a better person......all of which is mental bullshit stories that I tell myself. But without that bullshit, I wouldn't be as motivated to sit in meditation every day, and I likely would slip back into my old habits and thoughts.

Bullshit can help lead a person out of bullshit. It's like, how would a person become enlightened without doing the things that bring enlightenment about? And what would lead a person to do those things if not having a bullshit idea about needing to do those things? It's all bullshit, but some bullshit is more useful than other bullshit.   

So true. At some point we need to drop the bullshit but everybody starts with the bullshit. Then when you have had enough of the bullshit, let it go and what is left is truth

[Sashaj]

5 hours ago, d0ornokey said:

yes i've noticed that I've been pretending to be green. but it's out of ego. i'm not actually green. 

Psychedelics can green you up pretty fast 

[d0ornokey]

@Sashaj noted. have lots of practical matters to attend to right now but i definitely want to try it sometime early or mid next year

[Brittany]

On 8/20/2018 at 1:28 PM, PsiloPutty said:

I think we have to tolerate being full of shit sometimes if we are to grow. For example, I love to meditate. I've told myself that I'm a good meditator, that I enjoy it, and that it'll lead me to be a better person......all of which is mental bullshit stories that I tell myself. But without that bullshit, I wouldn't be as motivated to sit in meditation every day, and I likely would slip back into my old habits and thoughts.

Bullshit can help lead a person out of bullshit. It's like, how would a person become enlightened without doing the things that bring enlightenment about? And what would lead a person to do those things if not having a bullshit idea about needing to do those things? It's all bullshit, but some bullshit is more useful than other bullshit.   

This is cool.