Can enlightenment make a person miserable?

[greggb]

Hi, and thanks for taking the time to read this.  I'm writing today because I feel very troubled.  I've been troubled for a long time, but today is especially bad.

 

When most people use the word "enlightenment" it seems to me they have an idea of someone like Eckhert Tolle or The Buddha, who find themselves in states of such incredible bliss that they're content to sit and stare at the clouds.  But I've also read a lot of stories about people who believe themselves to be at least somewhat enlightened, and feel very alien and alone as a result.  If I'm at all enlightened I'd fall into the latter group.

 

My entire life I've felt different from other people.  Mostly I've always been inclined to think for myself, and it seems to me that the vast majority of people aren't.

 

I've had many wonderful opportunities throughout my life.  Most people would say that I was dealt a pretty good hand in life, as far as opportunities go.  I had parents who cared enough about me to send me to a good college, though I never wanted to be there, and blew that opportunity.

 

I was fortunate to land a good job in my early twenties, and if I would have stayed with it, I'd be really doing well today, but I found it unfulfilling, and left it.

 

I later went on to develop a successful internet business, where I really had things made, and I threw that away as well.

 

There are plenty of ways I could be making money now, but the truth is that I have no desire to be part of the human world.  No amount of money is meaningful to me, and there's nothing I really need.  I have very few material attachments; almost none, and I like it that way.  I just don't want to be part of the rat race. 

 

The more I learn and grow, the less I want to be part of the human world, and that's where I am now.  Every day human existence seems more futile to me; I mean the idea of slaving and competing for things that you don't need, and you're just going to lose someday.  So I find myself simply killing time, hoping something will happen to change things, but nothing ever happens.

 

I might offend some people by saying this, but most people appear no different than animals to me.  They do all the same things animals do, and the vast majority of humans just go along with the rest of the group, like any other herd animal.  And very few humans ever really think; once again they just share a brain with everyone else. 

 

I could go on about the human race but I don't think that's necessary.  I'm hoping someone will understand what I'm saying.  It feels like a real curse to me to be someone who's at least somewhat awake, and surrounded by so many people who aren't.  It feels like a bad dream I can't wake up from.

 

A question I have is, once you've come to truly understand what's happening here on planet earth, especially as it concerns humans, why would you want to be part of it?  Why would you want to be part of an economic system that makes most people slaves...grinding away to provide for their basic needs, while barely getting by?  Why would you want to be part of a world so controlled by consumerism?

 

And if you choose not to be part of this world, what are you supposed to do?  Sure, you can do good deeds and help to make the world a better place, but as long as so many people remain unconscious (and there are getting to be more and more unconscious people, as our population grows) you're just spraying water on the flames.

 

The key word for me is "alien".  I don't literally believe I'm an alien from another solar system, like some people do, but I might as well be, as different as I feel.  This leaves me with the perspective of an outsider, watching and shaking my head at the stupid things humans do; as they work their way towards their eventual annihilation.

 

I'm very well informed, and aware of what's going on in the world, and I'm going to tell you that this world isn't becoming a better place.  Anyone who believes this world is becoming a better place has their head in the sand.  I believe our world is heading for serious trouble, and when that trouble starts, we're going to see just how animal-like homo sapiens can be. 

 

In short I feel like I'm trapped on a train headed for a serious crash.  I'm alone, amongst billions of people who look just like me, but aren't like me, most oblivious to the reality of our situation.  It reminds me of certain nightmares I've had, when I was trapped in hopeless situations, and waking up was the only deliverance, except that in this case, I can't wake up.  What I mean is that I can't exit this reality, and enter one more desirable, as one does in the case of waking up from a dream.

 

I've been searching for a long time for someone who genuinely feels the way I do.  I'm 100% alone in my situation, and it would be nice not to feel so alone.  If you really deep-down understand the angst I'm feeling, feel free to drop me a line (send me a private message), because I'm guessing you could use someone to talk to as well.

 

Thanks, and all the best!       

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Solace]

Ohh, the experience of God is beyond infinite happiness. Follow the trail of love Greg and see for yourself what you already are. You are always connected, you are already perfect, and you were always enlightened behind the mist of thoughts.

Namste ❤️

[cirkussmile]

Waking up can be really depressive and lonely.

It will definitely pass. Just keep your attention on you and trust that it will be fine

[MarkusSweden]

@greggb Beautiful! 

It's very rare to read something that comes directly from truth. Your words are not special, but what's behind and beyond those words are. 

After a few lines it hits me that this must be your very first post. I've read like three posts during my time here that comes from truth, although many posts have relative truths to them, but your post comes from an absolute source, and these kind of posts tend to come from members who post for the very first time at Actualized.org. 

I know that the feeling you have is not joy, but it shouldn't be any sadness or angst either. 

If you like to, I can give a longer response to you that really hits home, you don't need it though, you're already home.   

And you don't need anyone to talk to. Let's assume I'm your perfect soulmate, our discussions/friendship could only be as good as your inner monologue, but probably not that good. A soulmate don't add anything really, other then finding out that you are indifferent even to people that understands you perfectly well. After an initial excitement and joy, you will see it's a dead end. 

To share absolute truth with a soulmate is like a given opportunity to correct a painting(if you get the metaphor), that opportunity is what generate the initial excitement. But you will quickly notice that you can't correct the paining to be any better then what it was before you met that one who understands you. At best, the painting will not be any worse. 

Anyway, if you like to me to respond other then this "stream of consciousness" answer, I will gladly spend a few hours to prove to you that I understands you, and that you don't need anyone like me.  

Sorry for somewhat broken English btw, language is not my skill, specially not second language.    

[Moreira]

I think and feel like you.

I hate this society, the system, the rat-race slavery and how dumb are people are nowadays.

And in the future, according the elites agenda to only be one mixed race, more dumb, easily governable, zombies of instant gratification.

Sometimes I think I dont want to have children to make them struggle in this modern slavery of agressive competition and, mainstream conditioning and indoctrination.

I also feel alone and misunderstood, Im not interested of my friends, like you say they are like dogs. I'd like to have awakened friends like me and have interesting .

The key to feel better is gratitude. Life is a gift and experiencing it as pure awareness living a human experience seeing, tasting, smelling, breathing is sacred and beautiful.

 

[Hamilcar]

trust me, I feel the same way.
I do see some good things in other people , but I know deep down that it is , for the most part , shallow.
I just feel so tired of everything... I get tired of speaking to people... sometimes they speak , and I am here , wondering why I should pretend to care , why I shouldn't just walk away.
I find almost everything boring... the only thing I love to do is programming , I don't care about fashions , about the food some restaurant serves , I don't care about what house to live in , and what furnitures to put in it , what paint I should use , what car I could drive , what social status I could be.
I just want peace...
I don't want people to count on me , I don't want responsability ...
Right now , as I am speaking , I am screwing my life because I can't even care anymore.
try living in a society where men hates women to the point where some want to throw sulfuric acid on their faces .
try living in a society where corruption is everywhere , and that your only way to live is to be corrupted yourself...
try living in a society where a writer could be jailed because he wanted freedom , while terrorists and rapists , and thieves , can walk free in the streets.
try to live in a society where everyone , litteraly everyone , want to devolve to the state of a society from 1400 years ago .
and am in the middle of this massive bullshit storm , wondering if I am insane , or is it the world that went insane.

In either case , I choose not to give a single fuck... let the world burn , or let it evolve, like I said , I just want peace.


 

[MarkusSweden]

2 hours ago, Hamilcar said:

trust me, I feel the same way.
I do see some good things in other people , but I know deep down that it is , for the most part , shallow.
I just feel so tired of everything... I get tired of speaking to people... sometimes they speak , and I am here , wondering why I should pretend to care , why I shouldn't just walk away.
I find almost everything boring... the only thing I love to do is programming , I don't care about fashions , about the food some restaurant serves , I don't care about what house to live in , and what furnitures to put in it , what paint I should use , what car I could drive , what social status I could be.
I just want peace...
I don't want people to count on me , I don't want responsability ...
Right now , as I am speaking , I am screwing my life because I can't even care anymore.
try living in a society where men hates women to the point where some want to throw sulfuric acid on their faces .
try living in a society where corruption is everywhere , and that your only way to live is to be corrupted yourself...
try living in a society where a writer could be jailed because he wanted freedom , while terrorists and rapists , and thieves , can walk free in the streets.
try to live in a society where everyone , litteraly everyone , want to devolve to the state of a society from 1400 years ago .
and am in the middle of this massive bullshit storm , wondering if I am insane , or is it the world that went insane.

In either case , I choose not to give a single fuck... let the world burn , or let it evolve, like I said , I just want peace.


 

Great post, the only part I don't agree with is the acid part.

Womans tend to fuck up things because they don't listening to men and instead go with their own irrational emotions, in such cases, it's ok with a minor acid attack to their faces I believe.

Specially if they repeatedly disturb their surrounding/society with their irrational emotions without first examine the contents of those emotions together with the an intellectual and logical mind of a man.

Way too few sulfruic acid attacks against women in general at the moment I think.

Acid is a very simple and effectful way to correct womans behaviour, since they care so much about beauty and don't like to spoil the beauty of their faces.

If an acid attack to their faces will be a consequence of bad behaviour, then they will make sure that they  guard their temper and irrational emotions/thoughts.

Other then that, great post.  

(Hopefully people still 2018 understand and appreciate sophisticated sarcasm)   

Edited August 20, 2018 by MarkusSweden

[Dogsbestfriend]

I relate to quite a few things you mention. Cutting with all the flowery stuff and getting straight to the point of what to do about it?

I know this has been tried in many ways before, some successful and some not - but basically the answer I keep coming up at is joining some sort of commune at a point. At least if your surrounded by like-minded people then maybe it's less frustrating while also living in a way that's less destructive. 

[Haumea2018]

Quote

A question I have is, once you've come to truly understand what's happening here on planet earth, especially as it concerns humans, why would you want to be part of it?  Why would you want to be part of an economic system that makes most people slaves...grinding away to provide for their basic needs, while barely getting by?  Why would you want to be part of a world so controlled by consumerism?

And if you choose not to be part of this world, what are you supposed to do?  Sure, you can do good deeds and help to make the world a better place, but as long as so many people remain unconscious (and there are getting to be more and more unconscious people, as our population grows) you're just spraying water on the flames.

None of this is a problem when you fully awaken.

The negativity of the world is a projection of the mind.

There is no (projected object called the) world, there is only The Self.

If you see a world, you're at best in early stage awakening.

Your liberation is not contigent on the world being any different than it is, it is contingent on purifying your mind.

Ever hear the expression "perception is not reality?"

How about "cup half-full vs. cup half-empty"?

First you awaken, then you'll figure out what to do with yourself, then what you currently see as "problems" won't be.

No "mind", no problem.

So basically, use your misery to fully awaken.

Edited August 20, 2018 by Haumea2018

[Dogsbestfriend]

@Haumea2018 thinking that you are one with the world doesn't solve things with the state the world is in.  Let's avoid the word negative, either way the world is not in an ideal place atm and considering the current trajectory it's not heading to an improved state. I wouldn't simply want to feel better about that if there's no new evidence to change my mind about it, that's not to say I'm miserable about it - but I do feel things could be more efficient and less predicated on individual prosperity. 

[Haumea2018]

There's no thinking involved, my friend.

Thinking is of the mind.

It is direct experience.

OK, I'll give you an example.

What if I told you this world that you see in such a bad light is an amazing learning center for souls both young and old, and that each soul is learning its own particular lessons, and everything is progressing as it should?  What if I told you that what you see as consumerism and obsession with materialism are actually pre-conditions for a serious global spiritual awakening?

What if I told you that everything happens in a particular order, in the time and place it needs to, and it can't be any other way?

Would that put the world in a different light?

Two men look at the same pile of manure.

One sees a foul, stinky pile of shit.

The other sees enough fertilizer to help his garden flourish for a whole year.

Who's right and who's wrong?

Edited August 20, 2018 by Haumea2018

[MarkusSweden]

On 8/18/2018 at 5:22 AM, cirkussmile said:

Waking up can be really depressive and lonely.

It will definitely pass. Just keep your attention on you and trust that it will be fine

Trust is very important. Happy you mentioned it. Thank you. 

[Nahm]

You feel the way you feel, from thinking the way you think. But you don’t have to remain in conditioned thinking / perspective. The “world” doesn’t even exist.  If “it’s negative”, your perspective is negative, not the world. The world is an illusion of finite duality, you can see it any which way you want, because you are infinite.  You can do practices which reduce overthinking, and then bring the cessation of thinking all together. You can be fully aware, of the Love you are, unobstructed by thinking. Love can change ‘the world’ right before your eyes, because love is the world and your eyes. Your person does not ‘create love’, Love created your person. You have entirely underestimated reality and what you are. That’s the good news, because you get to wake up. 

Imagine being fully aware you created this universe, and every detail of every person ‘in it’. If you don’t like market & competition, then stop putting any focus on it. 

Stop focusing on what you don’t like, and don’t wan’t - and you’ll stop getting more of it. The opposite is also True.

If a perspective is unpleasant, unfulfilling - why do you hold it? Are you not free to see how you like? Why believe your thoughts? 

 

Let go.

Do the practices.

Let go.

Do the practices.

Let go.

 

“I can't wake up.”

Yes you can. That “I” can not, because you made it up, and your overthinking is keeping you convinced. Self Inquire until you know the Truth.

“What I mean is that I can't exit this reality, and enter one more desirable, as one does in the case of waking up from a dream.”

This is a dream. Look around. That is a dream. 

 

Wake up.

❤️

 

[Nahm]

@Mikael89 Precisely. ❤️??

[TheSomeBody]

your mind is about a target, a point. there is no target or a point here.

all we have that is what there is. a dog doesnt care about that , he just live .  you trying to blame the miningless and the absurdety of the world for your feeling. logic doesnt control your feeling, your feelings control your feelings!!

 

[Aaron p]

In my (often flawed) opinion, enlightenment would only cause you to know that your misery is a mental fabrication and to subsequently overcome it. Like looking down a dark hallway and being scared of a monster your thinking about. If you were to have an *experiencial* awakening to the fact that there is no monster (ie, if you switched the lights on) the only thing that awakening will do is make you realise that you made that monster, and that it never existed in the first place. To me, enlightenment will only cause a lack of misery, it will disarm depression and kill fear. Because those things have never existed in reality...ever