Anger

[Crazy_Monkey_Brain]

my girlfriend often gets extremely angry and emotionally over the smallest thing, the relationship will be going fine, and then bamn! Out of nowhere extremely angry, crying, verbal profanity, over something so petty it’s beyond my belief, for example, I didn’t reply to a text message for 20mins because I was busy, and she full on had a completely melt down in anger rage, she would ignore any message I sent her, for a few hours, or once I didn’t reply to a snapchat message for a while and she, was having another melt down saying, I’m horrible, I’m ignoring her on purpose and there’s probably someone else I’m seeing, all cus I didn’t reply in like 20mins she sends me FULL CAPS I AM ANGRY MESSAGES  LIKE THIS. I’m lost and it’s effecting me emotionally it makes me very stressed and anxious, I go full monkey mind and I hate it, help me friends  

[aurum]

@Crazy_Monkey_Brain

First thing you need to try is establishing a boundary. And by boundary, I mean that this type of behavior is not acceptable if you guys are going to be together. Which I hope is true.

So AGREE with what she says, because arguing will get you nowhere. But then also clearly state your boundary.

E.g "Baby you're right, I didn't answer your text message. But the way you're acting right now is not okay".

She likely push back on the boundary. "It's not my fault, you're the one being an asshole!" STICK TO THE BOUNDARY.

In some cases, that will be enough. She'll cool off and realize she overstepped.

But in some cases, it won't be enough. She'll just keep violating the boundary over and over again.

If that happens, now you MUST enforce the boundary. And that means cutting it off the relationship.

I say MUST because if you do not, I promise you it will only get worse. She's going to realize that you're not going to do shit and that she can get away with anything.

If you do have to enforce the boundary and cut it off, then you need to be prepared for her to FLIP. She's going to see that you're not fucking around and that you you're going to actually cut it, so now she's going to try to pull you back in with sweetness.

She'll apologize, she'll say she was acting crazy, she'll say how much she loves you, she'll probably even try to fuck you. IT'S A TRAP.

Walk out of there with your self-esteem intact, knowing that you stood your ground.