Cant stop thinking about my scar from cosmetic surgery

[Western Buddha]

Hello my friends at actualized.com forum,
I'm studying the self-help subject for almost 3 years. I watch a lot of Leo videos. read a lot of books and practice techniques like affirmations, meditation and graduate.
I have a problem that bugging me and don't give me rest, maybe you will be able to give some good advice.

 

In my childhood people were always laughing at me the one of my eyes is bigger then  the other one, even my friends were doing this and gave me some hard insult.
The all thing influenced me and made me fall to depression. social anxiety. fear with the other sex and self-hatred.
every time that I thought that my depression is gone someone was coming and gave me a nasty comment that will knock me out into depression again.
I need you to understand that the real deference between my eyes wasnt that bad, the deference was there but I guess it wasnt that severe like I thought.
Bad friends and people made me belive that im so abnormal or an alien
When I became 21 years old I decided to change my eyes with cosmetic surgery (tarshorpy if someone heard about it)
The surgery went down successfully and now a days my eyes are really symmetric and no one can tell the difference between them anymore
I worked on my self and got over my depression and social anxiety I did better with girls and all,
but.. from that surgery I got another problem - the eye that was surged got a very little scar on the side of the eye.
This scar is driving me insane, for more than 2 years I'm thinking about it for almost every single day.
I compare my eye to other people eyes and always remember this scar again and again
I need you to understand that no one ever noticed the scar even not my girlfriends, it is something that only I can see.
I went back to the doctor and he also told me that the scar is so little that no one can see it, but it didn't help I cant get my self out of thinking about it.
I have tried everything in order to deal with it - I'm meditating for more than a year straight without missing a day and im doing affirmations and graduate practice for half a year
I tried breathing exercises and talked to my friends.
from my work on my self I start getting here and there some peace from this thought for week here and there but this thought is always coming back
this cosmetic surgery is reversible so i can reverse it back and undo the scar but then im afraid that I will go back to suffering from the childhood issues and i understand that inner issue wont solve with outer changes.

 

What do you think I should do??? im also thinking that if im doing affirmation that are specific for my problem I will be feeding the "devil" thoughts.

 

Thank you!!!!

.

 

[Joseph Maynor]

You need to get to the point where you accept your body.  This is something that Enlightenment Work really helps with.  It helped me a lot with that issue.  

Edited August 17, 2018 by Joseph Maynor

[Tistepiste]

You put too much importance on that little detail.
The weight you put on it is so big that the thought keeps coming back because you connect such a big load of fear / ? to it.

Trick is to stop giving importance to that scar / thought. Just accept yourself as you are.
Look in the mirror, look at the scar and be confident. Accept yourself as who you are and that little scar is a part of you.

Once you accept what is, and once you realize that thinking bad about that scar will only result in you feeling bad, but not resolve anything, the thought should fade away.

Like Eckhart Tolle puts it, thoughts are like entities. They need energy to survive. Everytime you give energy to the thought, it grows bigger, and you keep it alive.

Stop giving energy / focus to it, and it will die.