Am I not mature enough for a relationship?

[Viking]

ill provide some info and tell me what you think.

• my social skills when it comes to talking to strangers are very low, the things I say sound weird and I usually dont have common themes to talk about with people, or they dont pop up at the right times. im also bad with social cues due to lack of experience.
• It seems like I only care about getting laid, I couldnt care less about getting to know girls. That means i'd have to lie to get a girl, but my top value is truth.
• I lack confidence and direction in my life and I need to figure out my life purpose.

seems like excuses but they're not, its how i feel. I think im not ready for a relationship. if some girl would spontaneously want to fuck me or be in a relationship with me i'd be down, but in order for myself to initiate it I lack what i described in the points above. there's no way im going to manipulate girls.

[NoSelfSelf]

Having a purpose is male energy thats what you need and did you find someone that you like externaly and internaly,i found that many times you like girl internaly but dont like her sexualy and vice versa...and thats where you problem lies i assume

[Viking]

10 hours ago, NoSelfSelf said:

find someone that you like externaly and internaly,i found that many times you like girl internaly but dont like her sexualy and vice versa...and thats where you problem lies i assume

forget about find, I cant talk with any girl so she will be attracted to me and not be creeped out

[NoSelfSelf]

@Viking I understand you very well ( you had some childhood trauma i suppose )by find i meant being in the presence in some group it will motivate you to learn about the theory first its again all linked to ego unable to being vurnable comfortable with yourself and understanding opposite sex being a nice guy low self asteem all mashed up together (probably all caused by some trauma)there are so little people mature for relationship in spiral dynamics people in turqouis are able to have meningful relationships and they are rare...

Edited August 10, 2018 by NoSelfSelf

[Viking]

57 minutes ago, NoSelfSelf said:

@Viking I understand you very well ( you had some childhood trauma i suppose )by find i meant being in the presence in some group it will motivate you to learn about the theory first its again all linked to ego unable to being vurnable comfortable with yourself and understanding opposite sex being a nice guy low self asteem all mashed up together (probably all caused by some trauma)there are so little people mature for relationship in spiral dynamics people in turqouis are able to have meningful relationships and they are rare...

yeah, its definitely a trauma, i know that. low self esteem, nice guyness, not being comfortable with myself.. exactly

[Joseph Maynor]

You gotta realize that you're never mature enough for a relationship.  Nobody is.  Relationship management skills are like any other rare and valuable skill, you gotta work on them your entire life.  Be willing to fail in relationships.  Go into all relationships with the assumption that sustainability is never a guarantee.  This also includes your relationship with your 'Self'.  Friends come and go, relationships come and go. 

Edited August 19, 2018 by Joseph Maynor