MDMA? what can i say

[AdamDiC]

Hey guys, it's 3am as im writing this because i cant go to bed. Theres too much energy/haet in my body, and my thoughts are firing at %10000 capacity. So I'm just gonna write this trip off.

Trip Info:

Took 90-100mg of untested "MDMA" powder in an emptied out vitamin C capsule at 6:30pm. I had a huge lunch at my grandmothers that day so my tummy was full. The Molly took about 2 hours to set in, definitely no visible symptons within 1 hour into the trip. I thought the dose was a dud becuase my last MDMA was also a dud, I thought MDMA didn't work on me....well I was wrong. Kicked in at 8:30. Peaked at 12, then it just mellowed out.

Insights/thoughts/feelings/being-voiced:

• Do psychedelics!!!
  • For those of you who have never tried them, just do it. You will never comprehend how reality-shattering they are from a sobering perspective, give up your niave materialist doubt.
  • For those on the path... DONT STOP TAKING THESE. i literally lost the past 10 months of my life to being trapped in fear, hate, and petty ego drama. I feel revitalized now, amazing! These substances give you major insight. keep tripping y'all.
• I'm so scared to BE. Being is the most amazing thing in the universe, and i think it will lead me to enlightenment and many awakenings, but fuck its terrifying. the more i trip and meditate and grow, the more i get called to BE, but BEING comes from within, it doesn't feel like the old me or self-image. It calls me to be more open, honest, and loving. To think crazy thoughts that some may find disturbing. IT calls for the highest degree of self-acceptance becuase growth is exponential you just have to be confident in yourself. So it's calling me to be an amazing person and my resistance to that creates suffering, although growth is hard and scary, it is the msot important thing i can do in my life. IT IS LIFE.
• Always a sense of overwhelming potential. Just knowing that i can do anything that i can dream of is mind-boggling. but sometimes uncomfortable.
• I like crying, i was kinda scared of crying for the most part, because i thougtht it made me look like a wimp, but its ok. you dont have to be sad to cry, its just an intense emotional response. I found that i cried the most out of love, there were so many people i was thinking about while tripping that i wanted to be awoken or better. I want everyone to be blissfully aware.
• My kundalini is FUUUCKED. my body is a nightmare, lol. so much tension, heat, stored energy. I gotta do something about dat, prolly kriya.
• parents are important. You can't deny their existence and your relationship to them. although you may be different, they deserve your honesty. what can a parent be? how much love can they give? what does a stage yellow parent look like??
• Allow yourself to be lost if you feel the need to be so. Becoming utterly lost in the world is the only way to find yourself and your passions.
• Meditate everyday, such an amazing tool for living your best life. Simply the intention to set aside time in your day to meditate brings a happier mind state let alone the actual benefites from the pracitce itself. Never give upm always have the intention to practice daily and you will succeed.
• LOVE, LOVE, LOVE

The hardest thing anyone can do is look at themselves in the mirror and ask "Am I happy? Am I being? What am I running from?" and act on those answers.

[aurum]

@AdamDiC

Awesome stuff man. There's amazing research being done on MDMA and healing trauma. Definitely not a tool that should be ignored.

[MM1988]

I dont get it, I took MDMA at least 20+ times and I never had any insights like this. I dont even get the emphaty and love thing.

It is amazing but honestly all it does is make me a bit dizzy, lifting up my mood and make music sound awesome if im totally honest. My LSD Trip was simmilar, strange body feelings and thoughts but it mostly felt like im just one some drug and it wasnt world shattering or anything, same with 2-CB. I guess psychedelics arent for me - maybe im too left brained/autistic?

Edited August 5, 2018 by MM1988

[Rilles]

@MM1988 You have a picture of a pupil the size of a flying saucer? Yet you say psychedelics don’t do much for you? 

[AdamDiC]

@aurum Ya MDMA is pretty cool, a lot less hairier than shrooms personally.

@MM1988 Idk man we are all infinitely different. Maybe they're not but maybe they are. Good luck.

@Rilles

[MM1988]

13 minutes ago, Rilles said:

@MM1988 You have a picture of a pupil the size of a flying saucer? Yet you say psychedelics don’t do much for you? 

Im a big fan of Rave music and MDMA, dont get me wrong I think its amazing but it has nothing to do with spirituality for me.

[MM1988]

@AdamDiC by the way im not entirely sure if what you did was MDMA, there is no way that you dropped it at 6:30 and peaked 5 1/2 hours later at 12:00. I and nobody I know ever had that kind of experience from pure MDMA.
 

See this chart, its pretty accurate but from my personal experience its even milder, after a 10-20 min comeup I plateau for only about 1 hour and then it goes down. After 4 hours everybody should mostly be back to earth. No way you peaked after 5 hours from mdma. Maybe you got MDA or some Research Chemicals mixed in.

Edited August 5, 2018 by MM1988

[Elisabeth]

21 minutes ago, MM1988 said:

No way you peaked after 5 hours from mdma. ...

It's entirely possible he took a different drug, but it's also possible he's just reacting out of the ordinary.

Years ago I took a psychiatric SSRI type drug. "One pill won't do anything, I will take about two weeks before the effects become noticable", they said. Well I only took the first pill, first day. I got completely stoned, with a lot of laughter and gaps in my attention. I took the pill in the morning, the effect lasted from the afternoon to late night or something. (Needless to say I'm careful with drugs since.)

The psychiatrist kinda just shrugged and said "paradoxical reaction" and prescribed a different type of drug. Apparently weird effects happen sometimes even with drugs that are not supposed to have weird effects, since every body and every psyche is different. When it's one case out of 100 or 1000, you have to have good statistics and side effects reports to know. 

[AdamDiC]

@MM1988 oops sorry my bad, didn't understand what peak meant. For me 12 was when i was back to earth and its when i decided to call my brother. I wanted to make sure i was soberish before making contact with the world. so my peak was probably around 10:30-11? thats when i played John Lennons Imagine and balled my eyes out, good time!

and you may be right, I should invest in a tester kit to find the purity. it may have been spiked, but at least i didn't OD this time, phew! But as for the delayed absorption i just think thats my body. edibles and mdma take like 1-2 hours to kick in for me. 

@Elisabeth Wiieeerd.

[MM1988]

@AdamDiC Tests kits will only show you if mdma is in it, could still be spiked with poison, but ill be honest the chances are slim.

[Leo Gura]

@AdamDiC Great insights there. Careful not to get too cocky though. Treat these substances with respect or they will slap you.

@MM1988 Did you do pure MDMA in a quiet setting at home? Or did you just pop a pill at a rave?

Doing it at a rave will of course produce few profound insights.

It also sounds like you have a high tolerance, therefore requring appropriately higher dosage.

[MM1988]

@Leo Gura Mostly at raves, but I did small amounts at home too and the effect was basically the same. The MDMA was pure because I live in Central Europe and you can get high quality tested dutch pills easily.

Also I definitely dont have a high tolerance, I had comeups that were so intense I had to sit down for a good 15 minutes to handle it. It can get intense, just not spiritual. I also have friends who do it exclusively at home, alone and for them its just a recreational thing too. In my experience every MDMA trip is basically the same, it just pushes you into that positive mindset with varying intensitiy depending on your dose.

Edited August 6, 2018 by MM1988

[pluto]

@MM1988 You are either not completely letting go or have adopted/accepted no-cebo expectations/belief systems limiting your experience.

Stay away from all drugs/supplements/stimulants for a while, better, do a water fast for a week or two and restore the system to balance, meditate more often, immerse yourself in spirit and allow everything to just be for a few months as simple as as pure as it can and take it randomly with zero expectations and your more likely to melt away.

Take 2mg/kg - 2.5mg/kg i know its high but sometimes you need that big hit to smash the ego aside and melt in pure awesomeness. Don't re-dose. Weed also helps amplify and synergize exceptionally well with MDMA, it potentiates yet calms the drugged up feeling and makes the experience more profound, spiritual and smooths and lengthens it out. 

You don't always need weed, if the experience is powerful enough you can remain in new state of being/realization of authentic self as long as you wish but i find weed helps double the length of the actual high, takes MDMA deeper and helps you sleep afterwards.

I have gone to DMT/complete ego transcendence meditating on MDMA and Weed. I came back and found myself standing up in a prayer pose looking at myself in the mirror for no time recall with absolute love and appreciation, the whole world was buzzing with love, the eyes were shining like stars. I was back to self.

After a long brake, spiritual tuning, self work, healing, detox, fasting ect... It can be just as powerful as the first time and weeks to months of an "afterglow" of course you won't have the novelty but with zero expectations and go with the flow/let go attitude it can surprise you every time.

Don't seek "mentally". This is where people fall in the trap with psychedelics, appreciate whatever arises and enjoy the ride. In the complete "surrender" you see and find all the answers. Also best do it alone(this is where you go the deepest) or with 1 - 2 close, like minded friends that can propel and reflect each others energy to a higher degree than at a rave full of distractions.

I honestly enjoying talking to and find sober people at raves are actually naturally higher conscious than those who just go to trip because soon as it wears off, most of them go back to the unconscious monkey self and you can't talk to them about anything the next day until they smash their ego with drugs again, while the others remain naturally higher conscious because they actually put in the work, integrate and spiritualize self and go with the flow of self not the crowd.

Hope this helps

 

 

 

[MM1988]

@pluto thanks for the advice but dont recommend people taking 2,5mg/kg that is a dangerous dose.

[pluto]

1 hour ago, MM1988 said:

@pluto thanks for the advice but dont recommend people taking 2,5mg/kg that is a dangerous dose.

Possibly more for women, they should probably keep it at 2.0mg/kg at most but the term dangerous is really over exaggerated especially when working with tested pure MDMA in a safe, comfortable and educated set/setting.

Most of deaths that have occurred were from irresponsible people mixing MDMA with other substances or pills causing chemical reactions, not being educated in interactions with food/medication, taking booster doses, dehydration or drinking too much water(especially in females) flushing out salt/electrolytes excess partying/over heating, mixing with alcohol, taking pills and not tested pure substances ect.. 

Personally my most powerful and life changing experiences were around 2.5mg/kg as a male. Its safer to do one big dose then take an initial booster after and or keep re-dosing throughout the night like many people do. This is where it becomes more dangerous IMO.

Coconut water is your best friend, for balanced yet abundant minerals/electrolytes drink about a cup or so every hour or two or small sips every so often. Too much pure water has a tendency to flush out sodium which is essential for electrical function/brain which when mixed with a rave scene can lead to shutting down/overloading and then things can become somewhat dangerous.

Again females have to be more careful but at the end of the day Always stay educated and know what you are taking and doing and you should be fine.

 

[Vladimir]

My girlfriend and I both had an ego death on 100mg of MDMA at the same time. If you keep focusing on body's discomfort it will eventually lead you to the heart and then it will explode into a supernova....I think the music has to be right too though.

[MM1988]

@pluto how is it more dangerous to redose? I dont come up on redoses like on the first dose, they just keep me at a steady level, thats because most of the serotonin is gone by that point. I redose about 1/2 the original doses. On high initial doses too much serotonin could me released at once which could lead to a deadly serotonin syndrome.

I saw people accidentaly overdosing on just a bit more than the dose you recommend and believe me it wasnt spiritual or anything for them, they were fucked up as if they are blacking out from alcohol almost unable to stand, thats not what MDMA is about.

My advice would be to redose just once or dont do it, but never ever take a double dose. And even though its rare people have died from pure MDMA

Edited August 6, 2018 by MM1988

[LiakosN]

On 8/5/2018 at 10:33 AM, AdamDiC said:

 

• I like crying, i was kinda scared of crying for the most part, because i thougtht it made me look like a wimp, but its ok. you dont have to be sad to cry, its just an intense emotional response. I found that i cried the most out of love, there were so many people i was thinking about while tripping that i wanted to be awoken or better. I want everyone to be blissfully aware.
• LOVE, LOVE, LOVE

Great post man. I remember when i took shrooms I was crying and saying to my mom: Mom I love you so much! I just wanted to say I LOVE YOU!!!!

How does your belly feel now after crying ? Does it feel less tensed ?

Edited August 6, 2018 by LiakosN

[AdamDiC]

@LiakosN Lol ya, these substamces have the potential to awake the divine infinite love within all of us  it's crazy!

Personally my belly doesn't really store energy/emotion in my body, it's more my neck, upper back, and shoulders. That's where i hold most of my baggage. So ya, after i cried (it was more of a weeping than a cry, i got my whole body and being into it, i was sobbing and stuff . You really have to let go to do it right, that is release deeply suppressed emotions) i did feel a lot lighter, but now i'm also aware of more subtle tensions in my body during the day so it never really ends lol. 

To God!!!

[pluto]

@MM1988  Because the initial dose already releases most if not all of serotonin in the brain, the boosters mostly force dopamine to work as serotonin replacement which ends up going where in doesn't belong in the brain. This is why they highly, highly suggest never doing more than one booster a night if you are going to do so and keep it 1/2 of the initial dose.

You can only release as much as you have, the higher the dose just makes sure most of it is released at once which helps smash the ego aside to help let yourself go especially if you have used multiple times in your life already. I agree can be risky but the only death i have heard of from MDMA alone was from a 90lb girl taking 500mg at once which is 12.5mg/kg! No one in their right mind will do that, although i have friends who have over the course of the night taken up to a gram and 3 - 5mg/kg in one go and the worst that happened was seizure although it depends on body weight and male/female but with 2.5mg/kg its not as dangerous as they make it seem.

As a experienced user since my teenage days i have done up to 3.0mg/kg in one go and as have many others i know and turned out fine.

I don't disagree with you but if i am being honest still keeping it on the safe side for males(especially those who have used a lot) 2.5mg/kg is fine if you struggle breaking through unless you take extremely long breaks in which 2.0mg/kg is fine. For females 1.5mg/kg and 2.0mg maximum for those who use more often.

Again there's nothing better than a long break, a detox and some spiritual work if you want to have a blast like the good old days. Some more long term users prefer 2c-b as a booster they say helps bring that novelty back as it ads its own unique touch the to experience and makes the experience more psychedelic/spiritual and introspective overall.

Hope this helps

Edited August 7, 2018 by pluto