Intimate Relationships & Loneliness

[Athena]

On 9/12/2018 at 10:21 AM, tashawoodfall said:

We broke up the beginning of August...

that was a lot of fun and learning 

You seem sure you made the right decision. Good for you. 

My own issue is with finding friends, all I do now is pretend so ppl dont think I'm crazy. I had a bad experience with someone trying to get them to see. 

Life is just hilarious. 

[UDT]

On 7/16/2018 at 6:45 AM, ajasatya said:

instead of craving for the perfect match, focus on your own growth.

which will lead to more and more sepparation. The essence of a relationship is to grow together. If you cannot do that, you´re lost some way or the other.

[tashawoodfall]

@Mikael89 you're missing the whole point.  For some people like myself, we need a deeper connection on an intellectual and spiritual level.  That was what was missing when looking in hindsight so I would have never been satisfied placing him in that role.

 

[tashawoodfall]

On 9/11/2018 at 9:06 AM, GeorgeLawson said:

As it turns out I broke up with my girlfriend a few weeks after commenting on that post. It was true that she was meeting physical and emotional relationship needs but was providing hardly any intellectual or spiritual needs. In fact, the reason I was staying with her was mainly out of comfort and security rather than what I knew in my heart was right. It was very emotionally challenging but I gained huge growth from leaving that relationship and felt a lot more centred and authentic. 

@Mikael89 This isn't just "how women are" type of thing.

47 minutes ago, Mikael89 said:

Seriously, how could I ever be good enough to a girl? Answer: I wont.

This was the first time ever I even checked into this forum category, and I read that, and instantly got depressed. Big mistake. Lol. Bye.

And nice approach about men.. "If I threw him back into the ocean so to speak, it would feel as though I'm throwing back a really great catch with no good reason..."

Omg. Someone kill me. There is something seriously wrong with this world.

maybe the issue is within yourself.  Probably should work on ridding of the victim mentality, your self-esteem and attracting women...

[Shin]

6 hours ago, Athena said:

You seem sure you made the right decision. Good for you. 

My own issue is with finding friends, all I do now is pretend so ppl dont think I'm crazy. I had a bad experience with someone trying to get them to see. 

Life is just hilarious. 

Just go to meditation session or sophrology, those kind of stuff.

They can be found for free on websites that are specialized for meeting people (not dating).

Meetup is one of them but there are specific one for each country that are more populated.

If there is a French dude dudette here, it's called Onvasortir.

You can always join a zen center or something like that too, but it will cost you a little bit of money.

You can also create your own events on the websites I mentioned.

And finally you can go to retreats, but you may find people that live far away from you there.

 

[GaiaGoddess]

On 7/15/2018 at 9:34 PM, tashawoodfall said:

@Etagnwo Do you think someone who is self-actualizing can happily be in an intimate relationship with someone who is not?  I guess that is the question.

I have had this issue with my last 2 boyfriends and strongly feel the answer to this question is no!

[GaiaGoddess]

I am struggling with this same issue. My last 2 relationships were both with men who made me feel like I was light years ahead of them as far as self actualization. I felt lonely as hell in both relationships, lacking a deep connection with either of them. I don't think it's good for a self actualized person to be with someone who has no interest in self actualizing. I felt dragged down by both of them, and feel extra guilty and sad for leaving the last one because he, like your boyfriend, was a good guy.  I felt like I was giving up the type of man I'll probably never find again (since I am 46 already), but I just couldn't be with someone who was not on my level.

[Shin]

The masculine pole of the relationship must be at a higher frequency than the feminine.

Otherwise the feminine energy can't be penetrated and will always want to leave and find a higher frequency match.

This is very obvious once you watch carefully how those two energy interact.

So I would say, don't allow yourself to date a guy who isn't at least at the same frequency as you.

Otherwise you'll be just wasting your time and energy, no matter how great the guy can be.