how do I enjoy life without dependence on circumstances?

[Viking]

Does enjoyment of life just comes with time? as I meditate and do yoga?

is there something more to do than to meditate and do yoga?

[Torkys]

Love

[Viking]

24 minutes ago, Torkys said:

Love

you need circumstances for that, like other people to love.

and how do you get that?

[NoSelfSelf]

What is enjoyment of life for you?

[cirkussmile]

This requires enlightenment. 

And you can’t do anything for it to happen but meditation and contemplation is really good to prepare! 

Know that life happens, including circumstances and including your reaction to it. Which means you can relax

[Faceless]

how do I enjoy life without dependence on circumstances?....

 

Most important thing is to stop asking how..

And Love has nothing to do with you or other people. 

LOVE IS FREEDOM, and that doesn’t come about by asking “how to”. As long as we seek psychologically there is no freedom. Freedom from all that thought-self tries to put together. 

Edited July 3, 2018 by Faceless

[cirkussmile]

2 minutes ago, Viking said:

you need circumstances for that, like other people to love.

and how do you get that?

That is a conclusion you have to drop eventually. Love is not dependent on circumstances.

[Torkys]

11 minutes ago, Viking said:

you need circumstances for that, like other people to love.

Radiate it; there are no circumstances limiting it 'cause it is infinite.

Don't insist on techniques alone! Treating spirituality like just a series of techniques is like spitting in its face. Spirituality is not curing oneself of ego. Spirituality is a process of breaking down one's Boundaries and Resistance thus unifying oneself with the Divine and it will not happen just by half-assing yoga and meditation daily; all that you seek will come from following true spirituality.

@Faceless @cirkussmile You said it before and instead of me. Much Love ❤️

[Viking]

5 minutes ago, cirkussmile said:

That is a conclusion you have to drop eventually. Love is not dependent on circumstances.

then I have no idea what it is nor how to feel it.

10 minutes ago, cirkussmile said:

Know that life happens, including circumstances and including your reaction to it. Which means you can relax

i dont understand

10 minutes ago, NoSelfSelf said:

What is enjoyment of life for you?

good question. I have no idea how to describe it, but I can give examples. 

it's like when I can just be and not need anything, im actually cool with the present moment and i dont want the future. i remember for example when i was a kid and i went with my parents to a hotel with pools and food and stuff, it's not that the material things made me enjoy it, but the atmosphere/vibe and the aliveness/calm I felt there, watching the sunset near the pool and I felt like the moment was perfect.

another example is during my teenage years I had friends and sometimes rarely I was having real fun with them playing video games or hanging out, I also didnt need anything else in the moment, though that was with dependence on circumstances, the hotel thing was also like that.

13 minutes ago, Torkys said:

Spirituality is a process of breaking down one's Boundaries and Resistance thus unifying oneself with the Divine

and how in the world does one do that, if not with techniques?

14 minutes ago, Torkys said:

all that you seek will come from following true spirituality

what is true spirituality? retreating to a buddhist monastery? retreating to a cave?

[Psyche_92]

39 minutes ago, cirkussmile said:

Know that life happens, including circumstances and including your reaction to it. Which means you can relax

Easier said than "done" .

[Torkys]

16 minutes ago, Viking said:

45 minutes ago, cirkussmile said:

Know that life happens, including circumstances and including your reaction to it. Which means you can relax

i dont understand

Your limitations and doubts are inevitable and are part of the process.

17 minutes ago, Viking said:

and how in the world does one do that, if not with techniques?

The thing I was just talking about. Stop being rigid!

How does one do it without techniques? Ask yourself, you did spirituality your whole life in a subtle form without even being aware of it! You ultimately always had to break boundaries in order for you to be a happier and more fulfilled person. Use your intuition and be present - spirituality is simple but hard.

22 minutes ago, Viking said:

what is true spirituality?

Breaking one's boundaries instead of strengthening them.

[Highest]

Realize yourself, realize what you are, that you don't have a life to live, but that you are life and existence itself. Joy and peace comes automatically after realization, circumstances will matter little, the material worldview will matter little.

[Viking]

@Torkys I dont fully understand what you mean by boundaries.

and what you mean I guess is "listening to the inner guru". in that case I have no idea how to do that, I remember after an lsd trip I was able to, when my mind was clear, but it faded as my mind started to pollute.

 

 

[eputkonen]

2 hours ago, Viking said:

Does enjoyment of life just comes with time? as I meditate and do yoga?

is there something more to do than to meditate and do yoga?

Cease resisting and denying what-is...and appreciate what-is as it is...then life becomes quite enjoyable (regardless of circumstances).

Or said another way, happiness is what we are when we are not making ourselves miserable.  Just cease creating your own miseries. 

 

One way to cease creating your own miseries is to consciously see how you are doing it to yourself and cease doing that.

Edited July 3, 2018 by eputkonen

[Viking]

13 minutes ago, eputkonen said:

Cease resisting and denying what-is...and appreciate what-is as it is...then life becomes quite enjoyable (regardless of circumstances).

Or said another way, happiness is what we are when we are not making ourselves miserable.  Just cease creating your own miseries. 

 

One way to cease creating your own miseries is to consciously see how you are doing it to yourself and cease doing that.

thanks, I will try to be mindful and see when I suffer

[cirkussmile]

I appriciate your honesty! You are not as lost as you think. 

The feeling of connection is the feeling of love. Connection can only happen when the character steps aside.

Can you agree on that you do not have control over circumstances? Imagine that life happens in a flow. Everything is evolving acording to Gods will so to speak. The universe is evolving but this character has its own will. 

Peace is there when the character stops having a personal wish for what life should be about. When we have a picture of how life should be we will suffer because the circumstances will never be as we wish them to be. 

This creates a space where we realize we don’t have to do anything for life to unfold. This is peace that will turn in to happiness. Be clear that happiness and love is the end on suffering and not something that cannbe gained or kept.

[Viking]

@cirkussmile I think most of my suffering is not arising out of resistance to circumstances but out of not doing what I think I should be doing because it's uncomfortable.

34 minutes ago, cirkussmile said:

Peace is there when the character stops having a personal wish for what life should be about. When we have a picture of how life should be we will suffer because the circumstances will never be as we wish them to be. 

but how do I get there? For example whats relevant for me right now is when I study I feel emotional pain, it feels natural that I would wish for there not to be pain and to feel pleasant emotions. Am I suffering because im wishing for there not to be pain? how do I get rid of that wish?

31 minutes ago, cirkussmile said:

The feeling of connection is the feeling of love. Connection can only happen when the character steps aside.

I can see that, when for example I interact with people positively I feel a certain connection/love.

[NoSelfSelf]

@Viking Then it seems to me that you are looking for a flow state where you dont control and let it all just flow...be water my friend

[Torkys]

1 hour ago, Viking said:

I think most of my suffering is not arising out of resistance to circumstances but out of not doing what I think I should be doing because it's uncomfortable.

Being in resistance to the thing you should be doing is a circumstance. 

Boundaries = Resistance, and yes, I meant listening to your inner guru. If your intuition isn't that developed, listen to your body and your emotions. 

[cirkussmile]

1 hour ago, Viking said:

@cirkussmile I think most of my suffering is not arising out of resistance to circumstances but out of not doing what I think I should be doing because it's uncomfortable.

but how do I get there? For example whats relevant for me right now is when I study I feel emotional pain, it feels natural that I would wish for there not to be pain and to feel pleasant emotions. Am I suffering because im wishing for there not to be pain? how do I get rid of that wish?

I can see that, when for example I interact with people positively I feel a certain connection/love.

If we have a picture of how life should be (instead of how it is) we will suffer because our picture seldom matches reality. 

Yes. Whishing for pleasure when there is pain will lead to more pain. Why? Because whising for something  that does not excist will cut us in half and we suffer for something that is not. We denying the flow of life by wanting something other than life. 

Life is pain. This is a noble truth that the Buddha discovered. Life is pain and we can not do anything about it. Wanting pleasure all the time is not possible. With that said. It is possible to end the emotional and psychological pain when the desire for something else ceases. 

The sad news is (for You) is that you can’t make desire disappear because that is only more desire, you see? 

The good news is to see that you don’t have control over your reaction or circumstances. With much observation of this the desire for wanting something else decreases. 

Another way can be to reject all pleasure like monks do. Eventually they see that I Am no matter what circumstance. This I am is peace, like you described it earlier.