Can't go out with friends anymore

[Cudin]

It's getting weirder and weirder to see through the authomated egos of everyone around me (including myself). Now I understand what Shakespeare meant by "we are all actors in a big play". Sometimes I wish I could talk to someone "ok, so lets cut the BS. Look, we exist, we are here, isn't is fascinating? There are stuff, and nature is beatiful.

Some spiral dynamics green people are more relatable, but even then, I need to apply the effort with the need of everyone to try to be cool and different. There is a cult to the personality, but there is literaly nothing behind the mask. 

How do you guys deal with social meetings? I barely go out anymore, but the few times I do, it's always Awkward. 

[egoeimai]

I enjoy going out very much,and meeting new people. Although not every situation ends well and I'm not going along with every person I meet. But its fun! Its exciting! 

You have so much to learn from each other,you grow,you experience things.You get to know yourself better. Of course along the way you will meet egos and you'll recognize every part of it but it is what it is. You can't live alone all the time.its boring. 

When you finally meet people who have much in common with you,you'll have a great time,otherwise you let them go.

Don't try to change people,its not fascinating. Let them be or let them go.

Edited July 1, 2018 by egoeimai

[Cudin]

I'm not trying to change anyone. I know they are exactly where they need to be right now. It's just so weird to see the total social awkwardness that is human interaction. Maybe it's my personality type (I'm a enneagram type 5), but I jusk think I'm reaching a point of no return.. Idk... 

[egoeimai]

Why that awkwardness makes you feel that it is weird? What's up with this? 

Do you think there's no need to interact with people? Or that theres no meaning in that? If yes then do so,nobody can judge you for this.

[Hansu]

 

Leo has great video on the subject of "wanting to turn everyone around me yogis" (note: my description is exaggerated)

In the video Leo explains how people don't generally like when they are shown why they are hurting themselves. They have countless defense mechanics in place to combat your good intention to help them.

Instead of trying to help them, notice their flaws and think how their flaws apply to your own life. I watched the video a week ago and quickly found out that i am not the perfect human that i thought i was, and im in fact doing those flaws myself in varying ways. Now i try to remember this technique to grow myself and not fall back to sleep when i hang out with my friends, that's my main flaw

[Hotaka]

I try to be as honest as possible including my mistakes, all as an expression of my spirituality. If I need to scare someone away I will do it with pleasure. But then they come back or just never forget you cause you hit em hard in the soul with a seed that may only grow later on in their lives or when they are on their deathbed or never.

 

[WelcometoReality]

@Cudin I know that feeling. It's a sense of not belonging and feeling awkward. 

It's a phase when one breaks free from the social norms and culture but haven't completely broken free yet.

It will pass eventually.

[aurum]

@Cudin

Stop judging them for being at their stage of development. Just because we're on the actualized.org forum and we know some spiritual stuff doesn't make us any better than anyone else.

Consider that maybe it's awkward not because of them, but because of you.

Instead of focusing on you're different than them ("omg they're so stage orange, ugh"), focus on finding commonalities.

I guarantee you have a lot more in common than you probably think with even the most plugged-in-the-matrix type person. There are universal challenges we all go through.

Does that mean you have to spend excessive time with everyone? Of course not, you're allowed personal preferences.

But if you're going to be spending time with these people, at a certain point you have to admit that no one is perfect, no one is perfectly evolved (including you) and you should just learn to get along.

[Malelekakis]

@Cudin find some individuals that resonate with you and spend quality time with them. If you can't, focus on developing your lifestyle so that you are filling your life with things that you love doing. And lastly,  just wait, the right people will come when you are ready. 

[Spiral]

It's a phase it will go over, had this that few years ago.

I don't consider other people being a different stages a problem, had a few drink with a blue/orange guy yesterday. We talked about stock options and the ongoing political situation (it's a mess). Have have couple of green friends, besides all of the spiritual people i've met have been green. Their reaction when you share something they haven't full grasped is gold 

Conversions is not about the information, but emotions. Why do you have to talk about the nature of reality? It's not more profound than anything else. Have feeling you just need to get it out and haven't had a chance to do so.

 

[Cudin]

Thanks for the tips, guys. Yes, I think in the end I probably just need to be as humble as possible and it's (hopefully) just a phase. 

[Bernard]

I get the feeling man. Sometimes my friends annoy me as well for the same reasons. I feel like I out grew some of my friends but they also are good at things I'm not. I like to focus on the value they give my life rather than their flaws.

At this point I just want to appreciate them honestly. Like we all have our struggles and ways of coping. I just want to be able to spend my time with people that actually care about me though. Like create some awesome memories.

I learn from them and I'm sure they learn from me. We aren't perfect, may annoy each other for whatever reason but got to harbor love and value yhe relationships. 

Idk. Just my two cents.

[krazzer]

11 hours ago, Cudin said:

It's getting weirder and weirder to see through the authomated egos of everyone around me (including myself). Now I understand what Shakespeare meant by "we are all actors in a big play". Sometimes I wish I could talk to someone "ok, so lets cut the BS. Look, we exist, we are here, isn't is fascinating? There are stuff, and nature is beatiful.

Some spiral dynamics green people are more relatable, but even then, I need to apply the effort with the need of everyone to try to be cool and different. There is a cult to the personality, but there is literaly nothing behind the mask. 

How do you guys deal with social meetings? I barely go out anymore, but the few times I do, it's always Awkward. 

Keep doing it anyway. This is also a process. Learn to love the beauty in everything, even low conscious people