Quitting everything and joining the army

[Truth Addict]

Guys I need your advice.

I'm stuck in my life, my life is full of addictions, and I'm a total loser, I failed at college last year and I expect failure this year obviously. I've been paralysed in every aspect of life for almost 2 years. I can't move forward, nor I can do anything about it. I'm poor btw, I don't have much money.

Should I quit my life and join the army? Is this a good idea? Would it help to fix my issues?

[Brittany]

You should join the army if that is what you feel called to do but:

Everything you are saying about yourself are lies.

It is a lie that you are a loser.

It is a lie that you are a failure.

It is lie that you are paralyzed.

It is a lie that you can't move forward.

It is even a lie that you are poor.  In many ways, metaphorically, you are rich. Anyone who discovers non-duality and the truth (being here on actualized.org) is rich. 

So I am not sure what life you are quitting - if the life you are seeing is not a real one.

[Truth Addict]

@Brittany

Thank you for your nice words. 

I get your point, but that doesn't change anything. I've been trying so hard to change, tried many different ways, everything failed.

I feel like life is leading me this way. And I feel that I shouldn't resist it.

[Brittany]

You have a sword against your own self. Do you see your sword? You can swaying at yourself.

What are you trying to change? Who are you trying to change for? What are you trying to change into?

You should do what you want to do. I don't think the army is bad or good. It's neutral to me. But realize that you already are in a war inside of your mind. And the enemy on the battlefield is yourself.

[Truth Addict]

@Brittany

Hehe, true.

I just don't find anything satisfying. I also haven't found my life purpose yet.

The problem is that I set goals but I can't achieve them, because I don't really have the motivation for them.

I know my movement should be genuine, but I don't find anything to do honestly. Everything seems pointless.

[Brittany]

I feel the same way sometimes.

You write well and your English is perfect (many people would kill to have perfect English).

Have you considered doing something relating to writing or English? Maybe start small.

What do you already do well? Maximize on those things.

Edited June 29, 2018 by Brittany

[Truth Addict]

@Brittany

I might have to wait and see other ideas before I decide. But thank you ?

[dynamics]

What are your reasons to choose the army ?

And being a looser doesn't count. It is not who you are. It's a tag that you gave yourself (or others gave it to you) that will continue to poison your life if you keep it. 

[MarinM]

Maybe try to find seasonal job or something. Ive been stuggling for 2 years with will power and discipline and felt almost same way as you. Im working now for the first time in my life every day for 9 hours for month now. Ive changed tremendously and I still have 3 months to work. Until last week ive been struggling with myself unbelievably, my mind was crazy like never before resisting change like never and i wanted to quit everything multiple times. I feel incredible after month of struggle and i expect more challenges but im much more confident in myself and im doing work much easier (im a dishwasher for 9h). I feel like im growing unbeliavably fast now. Thats my recommendation - you get money for practicing discipline. But if you feel like army could help you it can be really good experience as well and can prepare you for life but the thing is also that you have to internally want to change and accept all the challenges as yours and not something “life forces you to do so”. Real growth happens only inside

[Truth Addict]

@dynamics

The main reason is lack of discipline and motivation.

I think I expressed myself a little bit brief. I didn't say that I'm sad for being a loser, it was just a description of my failure all the time.

@MarinM

This resonates with me very well!

I tried working many times before, and I was super-performing, I worked harder than everyone else, I got many rewards and raises. But I had to quit my job because I had to study, but again, here I am, I lack discipline.

I worked at a drug store this year, and turned the place around, everyone there loved me back then, especially my boss. I left for almost two and a half months now, and instead of studying, I'm just wasting my time and distracting myself. This lack of discipline is killing me, and I don't have a life purpose, nor I have enough money to leave town or start a business.

Yes, if I do succeed this year, I'm planning to work again. But I'm not sure that I will, chances are I'm failing. But even if I succeed and get a job, it will only sweep my discipline issue under the rug.

That's why I thought about joining the army, I think it can help fix my addictions and discipline me.

Edited June 29, 2018 by Truth Addict

[Truth Addict]

@K VIL

Yes it's calling me, I don't know about you, but serving the country here is mandatory.

[TomDashingPornstar]

@Truth Addict

What country are you in?

Edited June 29, 2018 by TomDashingPornstar

[dynamics]

@Truth Addict What are your others options to build discipline and confidence ?

[Michael569]

 

13 hours ago, Truth Addict said:

I'm stuck in my life, my life is full of addictions, and I'm a total loser

You go with this into the army and someone will make you their bitch.... literally.

If the army is your calling, then by all means. Just make sure you do this because it is the most meaningful thing to you and you deep in your heart believe in it.  If you go to army to escape your problems , you will take that baggage with you. You may come across people who will sense a weakness and your life will quickly turn into hell. 

So whatever you decide, make sure you burn through your neurosis first and ground yourself in your values and confidence in whatever is going on right now. 

[zoey101]

4 hours ago, TomDashingPornstar said:

@Truth Addict

Are you in the US?

Military is not mandatory in the US. 

@Truth Addict The military is a really big commitment in any country. In my opinion, the men and women in uniform hold the most respected jobs in a country, but are not treated NEAR as well as they should be. If you want to learn discipline and skills that will carry you through life, and get opportunities that most wouldn't, the army is a great place to start, but only if you WANT to be there. 

The army is like college, it's not meant for everyone. However, you said that it is mandatory in your country. Is that mandatory unless you are in school or disabled in some way? 

How long is the mandatory service? If it is just a few years, I think the experience could be good if you are able to handle the intensity of it all. 

As for this:

13 hours ago, Truth Addict said:

I'm stuck in my life, my life is full of addictions, and I'm a total loser, I failed at college last year and I expect failure this year obviously. I've been paralysed in every aspect of life for almost 2 years. I can't move forward, nor I can do anything about it. I'm poor btw, I don't have much money.

I totally agree with @Brittany

You are what you BELIEVE you are. We all have addictions, it's called our "Ego". It's a constant battle to live aware of it all, but if it's what you want, it's a battle that won't end till you die.

You are only a loser if you do nothing to better yourself or your life. You are gonna fail everyday, at first. But if you keep trying and make a constant effort, it will get easier. A big part of that is perspective. Some of the poorest guys spend their lives just traveling and seeing what's out there, ever heard of train hobos? I've actually had the opportunity to meet homeless people that CHOSE to be homeless because, to them, they are free. 

Do what will make YOU happy. We all have our own unique path, and the fun part of life, is just figuring it all out. You have to enjoy the ride, the good points and the bad ones, because in the end, all of these things will help you become a better version of yourself. A stronger version.

[molosku]

Dont join the army. There are so many cons compared to pros. Most of your problems probably root into 2 or 3 main issues, one of them seems to be negative self talk. Are sure your self dicipline is so low that you have to literally be forced to do some mindnumbing labour to get doing some action? Military service is also anti-awareness, and for a reason. Do you want to be institutionalized in place that is founded upon stage blue? 

I served 9 months mandatory, thank god I was not very conscious back then compared to now because i pretty much hated it eventhough I had the easiest task imaginable while being there. 

Edited June 29, 2018 by molosku

[ajasatya]

i'd join a buddhist sangha instead. have you ever considered living in a monastery?

[Key Elements]

10 hours ago, Truth Addict said:

I worked at a drug store this year, and turned the place around, everyone there loved me back then, especially my boss.

It's quite possible that this is a good indication of something. Think about it. You may want to look into this more deeply. Is there anything else you like about this? Does it remind you of something else? Can you elaborate on this so that it could turn into a career of your interest instead of something you must do just to survive? 

Because, I love teaching. I love art too, and I love foreign languages. And so, I combined the three to make it a career, and then a life purpose. 

[Chives99]

why contribute to the mass slaughter, NATOs actions actively work against world peace

[Tetcher]

Yes join the army or even better an ashram.