lets be real

[Arkandeus]

im absolutely tired of suffering

its not fun, its hell, its hell on hell on hell

and to all the spiritual guru's and know hows who keep saying that you have to put in the hard work

that enlightenment and eternal bliss is to be deserved, FUCK YOU

if it was up to me everyone would be allowed to be happy instantly, to be enlightened right now without putting in any hard work without any practice, without any friggin dedication, just happiness for everyone

I dont want to bear the worlds suffering like jesus, no thanks to that cross

I dont want to live a life without sex like buddha, I wanna fuck pretty girls, there I said it, its how I really feel

I want a ton of girlfriends, I want to live my daily life doing something I love, not getting grinded from 9 to 5 at a daily job just because I dont want to end up homeless on the streets without money, who designed this shit? God?me?us?

spiritual teachers telling everyone we chose this live out of free will? I never chose this bullshit and I dont want any of it

one big fucking brain wash, it almost seems

I tried the infinite love, but reality always wins

they want you to pretend everything is fine, you better smile and love and be positive or else....

im tired of this garageswamp bullshit painfilled mess that we call earthly reality, its the worst dream I ever made and if I ever fucking awaken to my higher self beyond this life ill punch myself for having chosen this "spiritual journey"

I never killed anyone, I never beat anyone,I made a few mistakes yes,those mistakes make up a 0.050 of my ovrral behavior

I tried to play nice, I tried to be kind,I hoped for everyone's success, for what?

everyones dead because I "realized" we're all one and life still sucks, jesus

f there's one thing I learned in this spiritual journey is that I deserve better, I deserve fucking better, if it really turns out I chose this journey out of free will I need to respect myself more

ps. fuck you life

Edited June 16, 2018 by Arkandeus

[Dodo]

46 minutes ago, Arkandeus said:

im absolutely tired of suffering

its not fun, its hell, its hell on hell on hell

and to all the spiritual guru's and know hows who keep saying that you have to put in the hard work

that enlightenment and eternal bliss is to be deserved, FUCK YOU

if it was up to me everyone would be allowed to be happy instantly, to be enlightened right now without putting in any hard work without any practice, without any friggin dedication, just happiness for everyone

I dont want to bear the worlds suffering like jesus, no thanks to that cross

I dont want to live a life without sex like buddha, I wanna fuck pretty girls, there I said it, its how I really feel

I want a ton of girlfriends, I want to live my daily life doing something I love, not getting grinded from 9 to 5 at a daily job just because I dont want to end up homeless on the streets without money, who designed this shit? God?me?us?

spiritual teachers telling everyone we chose this live out of free will? I never chose this bullshit and I dont want any of it

one big fucking brain wash, it almost seems

I tried the infinite love, but reality always wins

they want you to pretend everything is fine, you better smile and love and be positive or else....

im tired of this garageswamp bullshit painfilled mess that we call earthly reality, its the worst dream I ever made and if I ever fucking awaken to my higher self beyond this life ill punch myself for having chosen this "spiritual journey"

I never killed anyone, I never beat anyone,I made a few mistakes yes,those mistakes make up a 0.050 of my ovrral behavior

I tried to play nice, I tried to be kind,I hoped for everyone's success, for what?

everyones dead because I "realized" we're all one and life still sucks, jesus

f there's one thing I learned in this spiritual journey is that I deserve better, I deserve fucking better, if it really turns out I chose this journey out of free will I need to respect myself more

ps. fuck you life

Please do a body-dwelling meditation in which you become aware of the sensations of your body parts. This practice, coupled with the practice of deep breath and breath awareness make the mind silent. That's when you cannot experience suffering. 

If you keep doing it and keep returning to the sensations / breath after your mind starts to wander, eventually you will become enlightened. 

It's simple, because you have all you need for that practice always right here right now. And you can use it to calm yourself down and experience that bliss we are talking about. 

It's about focusing your attention more on your life and not so much on your life situation.

In the end it's all a big dream, so it only matters while the dream is happening. Enjoying yourself in the now through these meditations drastically reduces suffering. 

You can enjoy yourself in the now though many things, but what makes meditation special is that you don't need anything external to do it. It's the answer. 

[the_end_of_me]

@Arkandeus did it feel good to get that off your chest? 

Hey, if you're willing to share, I'm curious what you are defining as suffering. Is some really bad shit happening to you lately?  Or are you depressed and can't part the dark clouds? I'm just curious. 

[Dodo]

16 minutes ago, Mikael89 said:

I totally agree.

This is exactly what I have also thought:

This whole existence game sucks, hard. I mean, come on, it sucks so hard that it makes me doubt about all this spiritual/mysticism stuff. Maybe the atheist materialists and scientists are right after all. 

I'm not even given a chance to get enlightened because I don't have the time to put down all the work. Getting enlightened is a full time job, I live in west so I am fucked because I have to work to not get homeless, I'm a slave to the money system.

Slavery does exist even today, why don't people talk about it? Maybe in 300 years people will look back at our times and think this was a very tragic era in mankind where everyone were slaves without even knowing it, or accepting being slaves.

Consciousness wants to see how much it can live through and overcome. 

[Ananta]

 

Sometimes we need to hear from ourselves when things get tough! ((HUGS))

https://www.actualized.org/forum/topic/21853-horrifying-

On 6/6/2018 at 3:37 PM, Arkandeus said:

do not make a habit to listen to suffering, listen to joy, excitement, peace and abundance

listen to your good feelings, listen to what you want to hear

we radiate, we are at peace and in joy, in love and light we surf

Edited June 16, 2018 by Anna1

[WildeChilde]

@Arkandeus Whenever I get like that, I head straight to the gym and get an incredible workout in.  Anger is an amazing fuel if you channel it the right way.  Us men need an outlet for releasing anger and aggression; it's part of our nature.  Just find something safe to do, and go all out (punching bag, batting cage, chopping wood with an axe, shooting range, etc.)

 

 

[Solace]

2 hours ago, Arkandeus said:

reality always wins

Bingo. That is the ultimate surrender. Trying to be unconditionally loving is a fantasy when you don’t authentically feel that way. You don’t need to be loving to awaken. Life’s not about that. Life is about surrendering to what IS, and from that place you naturally become More loving and compassionate and selfless. Reality will always win, so why not let it win? Why not drop the whole loving attitude to avoid the uncomfortable emotions in you, and just be with what IS? That’s all, you don’t need a modality man, all you need is to be the awareness which embraces everything: all of your thoughts and emotions. And sometimes that takes a lifetime, so there is no rush, we aren’t racing to a finish line to see who can be the awareness that accepts what IS. It’s one step at a time. 

You already are complete, whole and perfect. You already are the unconditional love that you seek. You already have everything you ever dreamed of. To connect with that source of love we can focus on the spiritual heart which is what I personally do. When you focus on the heart gently through out your day, the heart will start loving what arises on your behalf. This practice goes hand in hand with being the awareness that embraces everything that arises because it knows deep down that everything is God. Even your frustration that reality hasn’t changed cause of your love is a manifestation of God. Everything is God. 

Spirituality is simple. When the mind makes it complex this is what happens. 

Namaste. 

This series will answer everything. Make sure to watch it:

 

Edited June 16, 2018 by Solace

[pluto]

You are not experiencing suffering, you are suffering your experience.

[pluto]

32 minutes ago, Mikael89 said:

That doesn't change anything. Same thing.

How you see it, is limiting your perspective. Its a choice one has to be aware of. Once you raise the awareness to a level where it can be seen for what it is that you are literally creating your suffering by everything you choose to do on a day to day basis.

[Viking]

5 hours ago, pluto said:

You are not experiencing suffering, you are suffering your experience.

lol, is it that easy?

[pluto]

Just now, Viking said:

lol, is it that easy?

It definitely can be, I am living proof. Its how you choose to experience existence. The mirror will not smile unless you smile first.

[Viking]

40 minutes ago, pluto said:

It definitely can be, I am living proof. Its how you choose to experience existence. The mirror will not smile unless you smile first.

what I meant more is the surrender to some "bad" experiences. I dont know if happiness can be generated, but suffering i think could just travel out if you drop resistance.

[Arkandeus]

everyone's words here are really precious to me,I toke them right to my heart, and so thank you for sharing your opinions 

@the_end_of_me somewhere it does not feel right to answer this request, should I rant even more?I feel ashamed

but if there's one thing I like and thats honesty, and perhaps it will help me to structure my suffering

 

straight away my biggest hurt is girls

ever since I hit puberty I've had a real passion for girls, they've shined like angels on earth, not only are they adorable and interesting,they're also sexy

I fell in love, I had relationships, I even did pickup, succesfully, because I am that obsessed with girls,in the end I decided to do the wise choice, to trust life with love, to not run after girls, that in the right moment ill meet the right one, gave up all pickup and approaches

all is well and good except im awakening spiritually, third eye is open all chakra's booming, To imagine the evolution of reality, its like a half a tab of lsd, some mdma and mushrooms in a single day, I quit psychedelics long ago, but reality is evolving everyday

the universe is literally being created everyday,the evolution of the human body visually, visually, in smell, in presence

its just girls are like gigantic godesses, stars of love, literally, and I dont have the time to get used to their divine appearance that 2 days later the visuals have evolved and they look more divine, more feminine, more attractive then ever before, its always like this again and again and again

I shouldnt complain but Im literally going crazy like a wild dog in here, yet I gave up pickup, I gave up running after girls,to do that again would be immense suffering, that would be like racecar seeking, Id literally burn under the spinning wheels, so im damned if I do, damned if I dont

I fall in love with half the girls I see and Im waiting, waiting for life....heartbroken

 

then comes men

I cant go out in the streets or the city without getting into atleast 20 psychic fights, the way I walk, my energy, Im literally in another dimension of space and time, everyone notices this, feels this, and those who are not willing to put their ego down, to learn from my vibration, will see this as me trying to submit them,they rebel, its mostly men who think they are tough and dont have anything to learn from no one

a real man can submit, its part of life, we all have feminine energy which requires us to submit from time to time, to submit is strength, the feminine energy is strong, immensely

energy is shared, instead of getting intimated they could take myenergy in literally, use it for their own life

lots of men disconnected with their feminine energy, so lots of men rebelling against my extroardinary energy

a fist fight is only the physical tip of the iceberg, I feel people emotions more deeply and vividly then I felt my own long ago, lots of men rebel, express aggressive energy, they express fear, they start walking towards me, they start watching me, tracking me, looking to stare me in the eyes, fuck them, the physical actions say nothing, the emotions are deep, they're iron, they're sharp, ive had many times where I sat down in a public transport and men get up and leave their sits because theyre scared to death, its their own fault tho, somewhere I act like a mirror, if you want to see evil in me you'll get it right back in your face

there are many men who deal just fine with my energy, good men, with whom there's simple peace of being, they are and I am, im goddamn grateful for these good men, im proud, even in such suffering there always seems to be a way to learn about love

then there are those who absolutely want to know who's stronger, who's the more powerful in the room, theyre the ones that refuse to lay down their ego

 if you want to know who's got the most power you're an evil power-mongerer yourself! let that be known to everyone

theyre the ones that immediately turn to me because I carry power, once you stop measuring power from others, you can have access to your own godly power, this is for everyone

I guess life needs me  to be some kind of butcher of ego on these streets, but the stands-offs are so intense and aggressive I can barely walk properly or I feel im about to be absorbed in the aggressive energy and I almost long to destroy these scum who target me because they cant put their ego down

 

then as third, there's money

the absolute fear of ending up on the streets, in the cold, sleeping in dirt, sleeping with insects, losing weight, losing life energy due to malnutrittion, without money you cant eat well,...

Im plagued by this fear so I find work, I go to work and I deal with out of control ego's at the workplace, barely a sliver of love, and a deadpaining 9 to 5 grind

fear,absolute fear, I go to work because I fear what life will do with me if I dont...slave, hostage of money

 

so women, men and money, these are my pains

thats pretty much human society

I do wish happiness for everyone, as always

Edited June 17, 2018 by Arkandeus

[pluto]

36 minutes ago, Viking said:

what I meant more is the surrender to some "bad" experiences. I dont know if happiness can be generated, but suffering i think could just travel out if you drop resistance.

Indeed, Surrender = more room for inner-peace/joy/freedom = happiness

[Guest Quanty]

Start by fucking/loving/lusting yourself literally  Then you come back and tell me a joke. 

[Guest Quanty]

Want to awaken and attain enlightenment by fucking/loving/lusting other human beings or society? Then you are on the path of destruction. 

[furashido]

1 hour ago, Viking said:

lol, is it that easy?

Its all experience  

[laurastarla]

Your fab post reminds me of my friend, who is the alpha lion in the African safari. He fills the room with his animal presence, he swoops up the cutest girl(s), for the first 5 minutes he intimidates every male. But he has such open vibes, he embraces everyone with warmth, he actively talks to everyone with this huge smile, so instead of creating hostility, the other males (who are competing for the same females) are drawn to him and want to ally with him rather than 'fight' for dominance.

It seems like, since the females are shining for you I wonder if instinctively you are preparing for competition with the dudes, subconsciously, they are reacting to this ? Maybe shift your energy so you are welcoming them in your tribe? thanks for your honesty I love it! 

On a side note, I wonder if my friend is truly happy with his forever rotating 7 woman harem? ;-) 

[DoubleYou]

1 hour ago, Arkandeus said:

straight away my biggest hurt is girls

ever since I hit puberty I've had a real passion for girls, they've shined like angels on earth, not only are they adorable and interesting,they're also sexy

I fell in love, I had relationships, I even did pickup, succesfully, because I am that obsessed with girls,in the end I decided to do the wise choice, to trust life with love, to not run after girls, that in the right moment ill meet the right one, gave up all pickup and approaches

its just girls are like gigantic godesses, stars of love, literally, and I dont have the time to get used to their divine appearance that 2 days later the visuals have evolved and they look more divine, more feminine, more attractive then ever before, its always like this again and again and again

I shouldnt complain but Im literally going crazy like a wild dog in here, yet I gave up pickup, I gave up running after girls,to do that again would be immense suffering, that would be like racecar seeking, Id literally burn under the spinning wheels, so im damned if I do, damned if I dont

I fall in love with half the girls I see and Im waiting, waiting for life....heartbroken

 

Can you try to simply enjoy the pressence of a beautiful girl without needing anything from her? 

Just appreciate the beingness of that divine appearance as you describe it and then move on. Falling in love without needing anything in return.

Let that be your meditation, and notice how quickly the entire vibe of life changes.

Suddenly, you are a fulfilled human being. And now others can fall in love with that too.

[Arkandeus]

25 minutes ago, DoubleYou said:

Can you try to simply enjoy the pressence of a beautiful girl without needing anything from her? 

Just appreciate the beingness of that divine appearance as you describe it and then move on. Falling in love without needing anything in return.

Let that be your meditation, and notice how quickly the entire vibe of life changes.

Suddenly, you are a fulfilled human being. And now others can fall in love with that too.

I get it, I try..but its like trying to ignore a dwarf planet made from pulsing magma and constant earthquakes, thats how I feel inside, trying to find peace in the few clear clouds at the edge of this dwarf planet, its insanity

if we were talking about normal girls and women as I once knew them in the past, I wouldve long transcended this longing,this need

not only is every girl women the most attractive women ive ever seen, they are the same time the first woman of their kind,im not kidding when I say that in the course of an hour the human body evolves as space, structure and time evolve too

 its the same with men, men look cool as hell, they look like gods,and every man represents the recreation of the divine masculine, a creation entirely new, never before seen, every man is the first man I see and every woman is the first woman I see

I shouldnt complain because its wonderful being able to witness this evolution, yet with it comes great pain

I really shouldnt complain but at the same time I really fucking should to be honest

telling me to appreciate this divine femininity is like telling a man to appreciate reading about the scores of his favorite sport team, only ever reading about the results and how the match went,only reading about those great games, never getting to see them live, to participate

 

perhaps suffering is what will make me appreciate things as they are?perhaps I should chase women again like a wild dog?

at the very least this whining releases details about my life, what you can imagine can be yours too, 

perhaps ill accept this suffering, what choice do I have, If I muster anger and frustration its all felt by me, against me

I will keep your advice in heart