Can't seem to get to a point where i feel a change

[steveRm]

hey guys , 

First to be fair , im relatively new 

I've Only been trying (i feel like im only trying) to meditate for a few months 

I have a kid and another on the way so finding time to do this is not easy but i try

But it doesn't matter what i try it always feels like im just sitting around with my eyes closed 

I dont feel , or see or connect to any of things other people here seem to be able to connect with

Is there anything you can suggest that i do to get better results with the meditation ? (well to get any results)

I dont feel more rested i dont have a deeper understanding of anything and im really trying to be open minded

Thanks in advance

[furashido]

@steveRm There are stages in meditation. First of all, let go of this idea of resoults. This only brings frustration that is counter productive. Let go of all expectations. Just observe. 

[steveRm]

i keep seeing this phrase , observe your thoughts
but what does observing really mean ? 
Should i "look" at thoughts ? 
Should i ignore them ?
Should i pay more attention to them ?
how do you observe a thought without thinking about it ?

Edited June 10, 2018 by steveRm

[furashido]

@steveRm 

Ill try to answer your questions. 

but what does observing really mean ? 

- Take a walk outside and look around you. Lets say you see a tree. look at it without placing any judgement or values on it. you don’t attach to everything you see right? Like that. 

same thing with your thoughts. your brain is constantly working, finding patterns in things, bringing up associations etc. Its just doing it’s job. 

Should i "look" at thoughts ? 

- The thoughts are there, just let them be. 

Should i ignore them ?

- Just observe them and let them pass.

Should i pay more attention to them ?

- No

how do you observe a thought without thinking about it ?

- Are you your thoughts? 

Edited June 10, 2018 by furashido

[PsiloPutty]

I did a retreat a couple weeks ago, and the teacher addressed this "How can I tell if I'm getting anywhere with meditation?" question. He said that it's often extremely subtle changes at first, but he said to ask yourself if you feel more compassionate than you did before you started a consistent meditation practice. Compassion for other people, compassion for yourself, compassion for animals, compassion for everything else making its way through life. He said that's often one of the first changes that people (when asked about it) can see. 

Are you doing one of the breath-focused methods? With those, I think it's easier to gauge some sort of progress by noticing that you go longer and longer between arising thoughts interrupting your focus on the breath. But with techniques like Do Nothing, it may be harder to see the small advancements you make, because there's no obvious yardstick.

[Ananta]

Try Self-inquiry meditation instead.

https://www.sriramanamaharshi.org/teachings/instructions/

Like, Ramana Maharshi's, "Who am I".

I linked the page for you. You can also look up other Self-inquiry techniques. I found that worked better then regular meditation for me.

 

[Prabhaker]

On 6/10/2018 at 8:30 PM, steveRm said:

Is there anything you can suggest that i do to get better results with the meditation ? (well to get any results)

If you are seeking the result nothing will happen; meditation will be useless. If you think about what will happen you cannot meditate. The mind goes on thinking about the result; it cannot be here and now.

On 6/10/2018 at 8:30 PM, steveRm said:

Can't seem to get to a point where i feel a change

 Meditation is a lifestyle, not an activity. Whatsoever you do, do it with awareness; this is meditation. Walking, walk attentively, as if walking is everything; eating, eat with awareness, as if eating is everything; rising, rise with awareness; sitting, sit with awareness; all your actions become conscious, your mind does not travel beyond this moment, it remains in the moment, settles in the moment – this is meditation.

If you are in a hurry, if you are in haste, you will never know the taste of meditation. The taste of meditation needs great patience.The more impatient you are for it, the less is the possibility, and if you are patient, it is bound to come. The more patient you are, the closer it is.

[WaterfallMachine]

I suggest you read the book, The Mind Illuminated, which talks about the stages of enlightenment. Feel free to make a quick google search if you’d like on the book or these stages on their own.

It’s important to learn what you need on your level. I don’t suggest many of Leo’s recent videos to newer people here too soon as it’s rather advanced. You don’t try to teach Calculus to a kindergartener trying to learn how to count after all, so of course some people are confused.

I suggest master the basics of meditation first. Breath meditation, noting, body meditation, loving kindness meditation, etc. All the classics — the part of self inquiry is that it requires a certain amount of awareness and ability to focus to maintain the view of Truth.

If you haven’t already, learning from books rather than Leo’s videos can help a lot. Peter Ralson’s Book of Not Knowing is a good choice if you want to make a lot of progress in the shortest amount of time possible. It involves a lot more introductory ideas to nonduality — while still respecting these ideas in depth by not oversimplifying it.