Life purpose

[28 cm unbuffed]

I've done life purpose course with Leo and I'm really confused person right now. When i discovered self-development I was researching it like a maniac and watched like all of Leo's videos in 2 months, while reading books and listening to Tim Ferriss' podcast every-single-day. I think that might impact my course results, I thought I'm Leo myself, becasue i was obsessed about that topic then as they say "you become who you are spending your time with". 

After that i had 3 psylocybin mushrooms trips, to truly discover my inner self, I thought about truly EVERYTHING there was about me, that could be my "zone of genius" (something I can spend lots of hours on and not get sick and tired of it). And right now, I kinda got what I wanted from self-development for myself, I cleaned up my diet, I'm meditating and exercising every single day and right now I don't really feel so much passion to it like I did before.

So - in summary, my all life, since i got my first computer when i was like 9 or 10, I was really passionate about computer games, and that's the thing I can spend like 20 hours a day and not get tired at all, I just lose contact with real world. I also consider myself as a smart and funny guy (one of my biggest strength is that I'm - like my friends say - a "brilliant guy"), which may be great if I would want to become a full-time streamer, I'm a likeble person.

But - here's a thing - Leo's story was really similar to mine (i guess). He decided to become a game developer, then a programmer, and then he discovered that he wants to commit his life to self-development. I'm a programmer myself right now (i went to study IT just because I liked playing computer games - i know that was stupid), and right now I'm not sure if that's ego playing tricks on me or what is really going on.

If I would decide to become a full time streamer, I also would want to fullfill my ambitions and become THE BEST in whatever game that will be popular then, streaming just for fun and money is great, but i really want to do something more ambitious while keeping stream entertaining. It doesn't mean that I want to abandon self-development just to play computer games all day, it will be part of my life to the end of my life for sure. 

I'm not really sure what to think about all of that, I just want some opinions of you guys, maybe it will help me some way, maybe not, worth a try.

Dunno if meditation or yoga can ever show you your "true life purpose" or it's just a airy-fairy thing, that you have to decide one day and that's it. Making a decision that will impact the rest of your life is really hard, that's why I'm that confused about it.

Thanks in advance for any personal advices you have.  Love you all <3

PS. I forgot to say WHY I'm really confused - I'm not really that passionate about computers game right now either (maybe because I don't own a good, brand new PC, I have lots of adult stuff to do and i was busy with self-development stuff and the only game I'm playing atm is League of Legends). Sometimes I just think, that I'm a mediocre dude, not a "unique snowflake", and I don't really have any "talent" or "zone of genius". 

 

Edited June 8, 2018 by 28 cm unbuffed

[egoeimai]

Your name,lmao!

[Elisabeth]

- since you have studied that, how do you like programming?

- what's your "impact statement", what is the impact of a streamer? 

- what's your top value that you want to build your LP around?

If you want to hear what I think, you're gonna outgrow streaming in a few years at most.  But maybe it's worth it anyway. You're gonna learn some skills, likely get fed up with computer games, and then transition into something else. 

[Slade]

@28 cm unbuffed You don’t have to make a decision for the rest of your life. Just move in the direction of your passion, which sounds like video games. If you want to live passionately then do the thing you’re passionate about. Simple. You said you think you’ll play games till the day you die, that seems like a huge clue to me. 

What was your top strength from the strengths assessment in Leo’s course? Find a way to work that into gaming. 

[Elisabeth]

Can you shoot higher? 

Can you do a more engaging kind of entertainment, so that people who encounter you get to discover their own playfulness, rather than being just passive consumers of a video? If you like mocking people and things, would you consider doing great satire off your videos or whatever form of expression you choose? Maybe your target audience needs a wake-up call through your humor.

The problem with games is, most are designed to keep you in for hours and loose contact with reality, which is great, but does facilitate escape and addiction and leave people mostly empty afterwards. (I get that's maybe not your experience, but for a lot of people it is.) Can you create a game that is entertaining but actually gives people the nudge to get up from their computers after a cetain time of playing? 

(Just thinking - feel free to run with streaming, but maybe we can come up with something even more compelling.)

Edited June 8, 2018 by Elisabeth

[Elisabeth]

That's good. Maybe you'll have to give them a little bit more of a "why" then "It's a challenge", but I guess you'll figure that out. 

[Elisabeth]

Not sure what to say, but I'm thinking of what my ex bf said about a game. (Unfortunatelly I'm not sure what game it was, I haven't played it.) It was some kind of rpg computer game, the main character was immortal and searching for a way to die. My bf was deeply impressed by the game and it's deep dialogues, he said there actually was a philosopher writing/consulting the story line, and they covered these deep topics of life and death and seeking, and maybe some others.

If this is possible, your game could carry pretty much any message.