As I was younger when i let go, gave up, or changed perspectives, when I something that was important looked as less important and so on I felt relief, happy, motivated and so on... Now I have deep insights, perspective changes, and realizations almost every day, but this does not change how I feel? witch all come from this spiritual path... Example, I feel tense about my job and boss, then i realize I'm not my job, its not important, in fact I have a very good job, my boss went trought a lot in life, its not thet bad, he evan loves me, its just unconciuos behavior from him and so on, then I still feel the same about the situation. example 2 the need to watch porn or similar, i do self analyze to that, i can give it up for days, months, see the structure of that pull, the illusion, the realizations after watching it and that is not worth it, then againg the same pull ist there, nothing changed I feel the same... my bigest problem is to deeply relax, let go, accept, stop being anxious and i cant... there is control over this stuff in some degreess but they cant be overcomed, as I easily did when I was younger, sometimes i just went to sleep and it was gone for ever, now the same stuff is there for years... The question can be also puted this way? How to embody (feel) the theory? Theory vs personal reality(feelings)