Consciousness rising but feeling apathy/unproductive??

[wakeel55]

HEY Guys!! So I have been doing inner work every single goddamn day for the past 2-3 months. And now I have felt that my baseline of happiness has slightly but noticeably increased and I have been feeling that my body and self is "brighter"? Kinda weird tho. However, I have noticed that I became more lazy and have no drive to do stuff. I read in one of David Hawkin's book that people often mistake apathy or laziness for spiritual enlightenment or whatever. What should I do masters! Thanks much love

[Prabhaker]

9 minutes ago, wakeel55 said:

I read in one of David Hawkin's book that people often mistake apathy or laziness for spiritual enlightenment or whatever.

If compassion has not arisen in you, then apathy will arise. Apathy means absence of passion. It happens to people who are on the path of meditation because to control comes easily. Awareness is very arduous. Control is very easy because control needs only a cultivation of habits. You cultivate habits, then those habits possess you and you need not worry. Then you go on with your habits, they become mechanical and you live a robot life. Go and watch Catholic monks, Jaina monks, Buddhist monks, and you will see very apathetic figures , dull, stupid, nonradiant. So, meditation is not control, it is not repression.

A man of meditation has learned how to be full of energy, at the maximum, optimum. Do some active meditations. Walk meditatively as if the eternity is yours, just walk the way you go for a morning walk in a relaxed way about three times slower than your usual walk. Bring your attention to the feeling of your feet touching the ground. Walk consciously but relaxed, as if walking is everything. 

[YaNanNallari]

It's not that you're too deep. It's not that you're not going deep enough! Don't be afraid to have some confidence or stand a bit for something in order to meditate and things like that. You just seem to have a moment of feeling low ability to impact things. Breathe into diaphragm to boost the ability as well if you want until it's enough. Having this in check allows you to have that positive kind of discipline.

[Solace]

What inner work do you do?

[wakeel55]

@Solace Letting go by David Hawkins

[Torkys]

The coming up repressed emotions and the release of emotional blockages are completely normal, almost necessary part of consciousness work. So you are fine. 

Feel the emotion 100% but do not feed it with energy. 

[iamme]

Either you hit a wall of apathy that you need to release or it could be that negativity (fear, lust, anger and pride) are by habit the motivators of action in the physical world. As you release more of that, you become more accepting of what is and less inclined to use your very precious time chasing worldly accomplishments. 

I would say, if you use your time for spiritual development, that's a more worthwhile use of your time than chasing worldly goals. But also in order to do spiritual work you need to maintain your body. So yes, the work that makes you money to use for your physical needs, you keep doing for as long as you need to. 

If you set worldly goals that are worthwhile enough to accomplish, try to rewire yourself to act from a positive emotion (pure intention, courage, acceptance, peace). 

By the way, in writing the Letting Go book, Hawkins inspired himself from Lester Levenson's speeches who also inspired the Sedona Method and The Releasing Technique and a few others.

[Solace]

@wakeel55 That is a good one. About your question. Notice how you can't stop apathy from arising even if you tried, you can either accept it or reject it. Feeling is the ultimate acceptance

[Surfingthewave]

I've had a similar experience and on reflection I was about to break through a plateau. The apathy and lack of motivation is a good sign, just keep going deeper and deeper. I'm battling with being able to stick at it so if you keep up with the daily practice you'll find you'll move through it. Good luck!