Sonder

[Anna Konstantaki]

With this tricky mind I don´t need enemies. No thing or person, no word, no concept can prove itself worthy of that title, can keep up with its creativity and skill...

Nobody would go as far as the mind does to make its art of deception. That is when ugly is beautiful, when one starts noticing, truly appreciating its power. Only when one realizes how it makes one suffer, when it wakes one up to empower it of better use. 

[Anna Konstantaki]

knowledge<wisdom<consciousness

Wisdom alone is not enough to prevent suffering but it can help us to trace its origin.

Edited November 23, 2017 by Anna Konstantaki
it... it can help us

[Anna Konstantaki]

If nothing then... Nothing.

Nothing, nothing and nothing whilst nothing when nothing in nothing from nothing. Nobody ever nothing, nothing ever nothing because of nothing. All nothing...

NOTHING!!!

Nothing...

Here´s an insanity fellow:

"III! Am nOthiiing! I will nEver bEee...! AnYy-thIiiing!!"

...

I like stories. What can I do? 

 

[Anna Konstantaki]

[Anna Konstantaki]

Maybe I should elaborate on the picture...

We can look at small things to understand the big things they are part of...

Why can´t we look at the whole then,
the  big thing to get a better understanding of its parts?

We don´t really understand what reality is and how it functions. Why would we then claim to know what its parts called science
or brain or matter are? It´s like with the picture above... Whatever appears in the small thought cloud is simultaneously contained in the big one.

If the big one isn´t real or even if it just could possibly be unreal or different from what we thought that has some implications for how serious we can take its content.

If we can´t even prove the existence of the big one then why should we be able to believe in any content of the smaller ones?
Why even limit ourselves to a god damn cloud, no matter its size, when we don´t even know if it´s real? 

No (thought) cloud, or cells, no place, no where. Why even, after all?

PS.:  Leo seems so happy having deconstructed the notion of a brain and materialism. 
The monks must be proud...!

[Anna Konstantaki]

... And within the world arising all the ends and all beginnings, all borders and all states... Are things...

Tragedy/trauma

Any kind of abuse, emotional, physical, sexual, any kind of loss, by the hand of someone or the play of circumstances, or any kind of diagnosis or shitty prophecy or prediction, any of these events are a call to look at life deeper and ask why and how and when... It´s a call to understand how the world functions and what the hell it is. When it´s all fine we rarely ask why me, why now, why this? We just float in mediocrity or paradise in no appreciation. We don´t want to run from it in pain and wonder where our place is, neither do we care to find ways within it to solve what we would call a problem of suffering, of discomfort.

It is a call to start from that small part of fate, of pre given circumstance and destiny, of that story of yours to expand to all the other and get to know the world, life, reality as a whole. Anyone who is too fixed on single lives, single stories, who does not see a bigger picture is missing out on the best the human experience can give and is, furthermore, prone towards depression or unhealthy ways to fill his/her life in order not to suffer that.

Without those who misinterprete tragedy we could not value the construction of positive meaning and even truth as a whole, we could not understand the mechanics of ignorance and knowledge or beliefs.

Without those who understand tragedy in depth we would not be woken up and get inspired to become better and more ideal, to work harder for a less tragic world than we would had ever in the comfort of Eden.

Misfortune and crime do hold us back from evolving but are along with bare survival its co-creators.

Tragedy in all its forms, is perfect.

Minus times minus makes plus...

"The traumatized are unpredictable because we know we can survive." (from Dexter).

I don´t know how peaceful a healthy death can be but I do know that it can teach us much to encounter death at least once, unprepared. There are many ways of human dying but it takes quite a lot for an ultimate, a final strike for us to end, doesn´t it?

Let´s not focus on these scars but on how much we can endure after all.
Maybe even so much that we don´t have to

[Anna Konstantaki]

 

God flows through the humans to feel in their ways.

Teach god the truth through the experience of human hearts, skins, noses, tongues, ears, eyes...

Teach god sustainably, show beauty, share the love and teach the wise.

But always trust, even the harshest question,  as god sees through all of lies.

Thoughts are fallible as they are part of a fallible mind

but trust god as god is learning, that will show which way is right.

By teaching god you´ll be gods student and maybe one day a master just as bright.

 

Maybe...  

... If I don´t fall back to feeling tainted...

 

 

 

 

[Anna Konstantaki]

On ‎31‎.‎03‎.‎2016 at 11:08 AM, Anna Konstantaki said:

 

I´d rather see a little of everything before I die instead of knowing little but like the back of my hand. 

hahaha

[Anna Konstantaki]

On ‎11‎.‎03‎.‎2016 at 7:36 AM, Anna Konstantaki said:

 As a child It did not dream upon any specific future but it has been quite early that It took the decision to become wise one day. 

ahahahaha

...oh dear

 

[Anna Konstantaki]

... and then Leo came and said that he always was a strategic motherfucker... 

 

[Anna Konstantaki]

...and then I was naive enough to think that I could do the sagely stuff on top of everything else...

...and then I left my studies... I could get back into uni or something similar as people suggest me to and sell my soul...

...I could sell it for some years... And I´d come back and find hundreds of videos and lessons I wouldn´t had watched or 

processed in my mind... How much I´d had have to unlearn...

[Anna Konstantaki]

...better 9 to five jobs then... I don´t know what to do...

...Let´s pray...

My infinite mindfuck who art in heaven,
Hallowed be my name, or not.
I don´t give a fuck if My kingdom come.
I don´t care if My will be done on earth, as I don´t care about heaven.
I earn my daily bread... Or steal... Or die...
Fuck tresspasses.
As tresspass isn´t even real.
Fuck temptation,
I´m free to do any evil.
I am the kingdom,
Fuck the power and the glory,
Forever,
Amen
 

[Anna Konstantaki]

Once there was a powerful wizard known by the name of Trip Balls...

... Trip Balls had the ability of turning shit into magic... He gathered a bunch of weirdos around him as his kind of sorcery was no widely known or practised art in his time and space. 

The weirdos watched his tricks in awe as their shit was transformed into magic rainbow bubble clouds... 

One day so many magic cloud bubbles gathered that they started raining! 

Touched by the magic raindrops the weirdos started acquiring more and more magic powers by themselves.

One day they had so little shit left inside of them that they could do pure magic...

With that pure magic they all desired to do the same... Namely spread as much as possible of it out into the world. 

On this they based their visions and their purpose.

At some point they were all so conscious of the magic that they felt it flowing through them every moment of their lives.

They became a force of nature. Aware of the ever seeing eye they had created...

They grew... So did their number... And their vision... And the eye... By copying itself... Like a colourful virus...

And that? Well, it flowered... It just bloomed... It transformed into a flower...

All these circles of wizards and witches were the petals of that flower...

All these circles started overlapping and entangling, they just merged into one big, infinite flower. Everyone became conscious of the endless field of colourful magic. Everyone realized how it had actually always been there.

And knowing that... They went off doing things we can´t imagine yet... (this last image is "the flower of life" by JanRobbe- the rest is all mine ) 

PS.: Trip Balls: !!  

[Anna Konstantaki]

I don´t know how we will solve the marketing problem. (Tried for a couple of hours... :S)

I don´t know how we could build a skin under a skin, a system under a system so that the old one could just peacefully break off without everything collapsing into chaos. Or at least I can´t tell you in detail...

...I watched "into the wild" on 24th of December for the first time. I think this movie is sad. I have linked survival, nature, freedom, truth and escape differently...

Sigh... Movies... Leo incepted this idea in my mind that this is all equally unreal...

Do I feel alive when I face the elements or when I sit inside a room or when I walk the same routs again and again? I feel like life is more surreal than ever. 

I could talk about my new job. What do you mean with "that is a bad idea?" Who are you? Fear? How´s it like to work indirectly for the government? (Well, I definitely know too much to work for almost anyone... Private or non... And at least I am not involved in selling bullshit?) I can´t even decide if I find it boring or interesting... Well, it is not exactly where I´d go to practise non violence (I don´t think it´s my time yet?) ... Neither would I practise violence... Running should do best in my case... At least that is what they told me... In the current context. And walky talkies are cute? 

I am everyone but everyone´s so full of surprises... That awkward moment when you realise that one of the people you liked most does actually have certain values which stand in contradiction with those of someone who should keep certain people safe... I have a fascination with people who twist everything around in an astounding speed, who use every clue you give them to trick or test you, to impress you, who even admit how they like being reassured. Their logic rules their empathy, their compliments, advice and jokes are strategic and for some reason you can see how they try to always be alert because they don´t trust anyone even amongst "friends". Of course I have to become friends with the knockout specialist... Of course... (sigh...)

But there is nothing I love more than Leo´s arrogant better knower, I am so far ahead of you asshole smile which I perceive that way because I´m not always dead... Until I get more of his self proclaimed dessert (let me add poisonous...) <3 <3 It must be True love... Just like P!nk described it in her song...

Embodying wisdom or the divine feminine? Failed. Failed so bad  

day 1 I burped as a statement of opinion about someone´s behaviour towards me (I have trained myself to burp whenever I want to even without any consumption of soda). When the person asked where I was from I answered "my mom´s vagina" (I still regret that because it´s not the truth, at least just one materialistic perspective on it)... Yes, I know... I love working with men. I feel much more comfortable around them... Then there was that day when I constructed a gigantic paper plane out of the old calendar... And I played some ping pong with the Kurds and Arabs. One of them says I am a problem, another says I am sweet. I could go on with all the naughty bullshit... At least I am doing some linguistic fieldworks when time allows it because I want to understand what they are saying... Most refugees speak Arabian, a lot speak Kurdish and some speak Russian.  

I think I am 1 and a half episodes of actualized.org behind? But I´m still here. Somehow... 

But look I got some subtractions for you?

uncertainty minus fear= magic

unpredictability minus fear= journey/exploration/enlightenment

thoughts/sensing time minus fear=peace 

 

 

[Anna Konstantaki]

game of life/self deception

OOOoooooeeeeeeEEeeeeoooooooooooOOOOO

was that bottle a red herring? ah, damn...