The "Alter Ego" phenom and his stuff

[Moreira]

I dont know how to express this concept but I found it's called the alter ego, like Jeckyll and Mr Hyde.

I talk very few. When my ego thinks I'm very negative, angry, bitter. I cant control it, it comes out llike an automatical response, maybe bodyly tension or whatever.

But when i start talking I'm a beautiful person, kind, caring, the best part of me comes out, and when I hear my voice I love being me.

I dont understand why this double version of me occurs, if one is the ego and other the true self.

My theory is that the automatic response of my thoughts is like a survival mechanism or fly/fight response to the interpretation of external stymulus like ( fear, competitive environment, negative news everywhere...). Still negative conditioning in my subconscious.

And when I talk I dont filter or overthink, just let the true self out and expand positivity fom my heart?

[RichardY]

@Moreira They both are the true self. Might be like a super Ego that mediates between the two halves, using a morality(really herd instinct, therefore not universal or morality) that is innate. Personally I think it is possibly better to try and unite the two halves. As opposed to further seperating them, supressing one expressing the other. Speculating though. The other coming back with a vengence much latter. 

[tsuki]

@Moreira Try having conversations with yourself when you are alone. Whisper, or talk out loud.
Talk as if you were talking to another person and listen as the same time. Take turns.
Give advice to yourself. Comfort yourself. Get angry at yourself if you must. Be honest. There's nobody to judge.
The key is to honestly play both roles. To forget that you are playing.
Listen as if you were listening to another person.
Talk as if you were talking to another person.
See if you call yourself names. Would you call other people names in this situation?

When you become comfortable, try mediating between the two of you. Try to understand your 'broken' half.
It may very well turn out that your 'broken' half is resentful towards you 'good' half. Listen to him honestly.
Try to have a relationship with yourself. It is the most important relationship in your life.
No matter where you go, no matter who you meet - you will be there too!
Love yourself.

Edited May 1, 2018 by tsuki

[Moreira]

26 minutes ago, tsuki said:

@Moreira Try having conversations with yourself when you are alone. Whisper, or talk out loud.
Talk as if you were talking to another person and listen as the same time. Take turns.
Give advice to yourself. Comfort yourself. Get angry at yourself if you must. Be honest. There's nobody to judge.
The key is to honestly play both roles. To forget that you are playing.
Listen as if you were listening to another person.
Talk as if you were talking to another person.
See if you call yourself names. Would you call other people names in this situation?

When you become comfortable, try mediating between the two of you. Try to understand your 'broken' half.
It may very well turn out that your 'broken' half is resentful towards you 'good' half. Listen to him honestly.
Try to have a relationship with yourself. It is the most important relationship in your life.
No matter where you go, no matter who you meet - you will be there too!
Love yourself.

Thanks for the response. I dont see this phenomena as two broken half... but two opposite ways to react. For example if somebody opens the door immediately by suprise is the automatic default me who reacts, the fearful one, the scary, the angry. This reaction is almost unconscious. And then I feel regretful.   

But  when I have to do a public talk or explain something or I see somebody coming the conscious gentle me is who reacts nicely.

I think reprograming my default mode ( that in my case is bad) will take lot of time. Any tip?

Edited May 1, 2018 by Moreira

[tsuki]

1 hour ago, Moreira said:

Thanks for the response. I dont see this phenomena as two broken half... but two opposite ways to react. For example if somebody opens the door immediately by suprise is the automatic default me who reacts, the fearful one, the scary, the angry. This reaction is almost unconscious. And then I feel regretful.   

Accept that both opposite halves of your personality have their respective roles to play.
You can only dismiss your rabid half by pretending it's not there.
There is no 'nice' way to pretend that somebody is not there.
This 'ignoring' is not something the 'nice' does. It is the rabid turning on itself.
This is why you feel regret and all of the 'bad' emotions. Anger, fear, regrets belong to rabidness.

If you were to respect your rabidness though... you may find it useful if you let it express itself.
Love your rabid personality so that you do not fear fear.
Would you explain to a bear that you are not tasty?
What if you treat other people as bears because you do not know what true, real, rabidness is?
Simply because you haven't learned to use it?
We really don't live among rabid people, so your rabidness could relax a little if it could only stop watching itself and could simply watch out.
 

Edited May 1, 2018 by tsuki