Would You Feel Hurt If Your Girlfriend Asked For A Threesome?

[carlo]

she asked me for a Threesome with other girl, before me she was in a relationship with a woman, and now i feel so bad .. i dont know what to do!

after she said that, i just saw her, after he asked me fro a Threesome, i just look at it and asked if  was serious, but she only turned red without saying anything, then I asked again, and she told me not to look at her and she did not tell me anything.

after I told her that I did not think that if you love a person, you would not like to see it or watch it with someone else masturbating or having sex. she just told me I was right and forget it. after I'd asked again and she told me that I was right and to forgive that just stop thinking about it, but I can´t do it, I can not stop thinking that she lied and she ever wanted to have a threesome, I feel disrespected, and seriously felt that i loved her but now I just feel pain every time I hear his name, I need to start with personal development two months ago, but now I feel that everything is going to waste. now she just tells me turned red because she thought I was asking him about his sexuality and that he was sorry to talk about it, but the two of us we had already broached the subject before and she had not turned red and without saying a word . I just feel that it hurts a lot, I need some advice.

 

sorry for the english, im from colombia. 

[Ayla]

@carlo

I think it is a great sign of confidence she is giving you in asking this. She trusts you enough to ask for something that she is desiring to experience. Also, the fact that she turned red, means that she realized that she might have hurt you and then told you to forget about it so that this doesn't hurt you further.

These types of subjects demand a great maturity and yes, self-development work. You also need to understand that when you begin self development, everything that appears into your experience is some kind of a healing, and integral part of the whole process.

So, there is no need for you to be hurt. Just answer her honestly that you do not feel inclined to participate in something like that, if that is what you feel. Also, if you feel you lost your trust in her, work with trust issues next. See where they come from and why are you so shaken by this story? This should be the next on your self improvement to do list  

PS: Did you know that this type of threesome is in the top 5 list of male sexual fantasies?  

[Guest]

Well I guess it all depends on how you see your own relationship. When you rather focus on the intimacy between you and her and monogamy is the only thing that you consider, well then it might be a shock for you to hear such a thing.

But if I were in your situation I would go crazy and be super happy. I told my gf about threesome, that I would like to have it once in my life. She told me that she would only consider it with another girl then, but she would rip her head off anyway Had so many thoughts about the perfect threesome.

I can totally understand that you have many questions now, because she was in a relationship with a woman before. You have to clear your mind. When you and her have different ideas of that relationship, well then you might end it, before she might hurt you. But as I said, talk it out. Communication is important.

[Elton]

@carlo you are such a lucky guy, why don't you accept that suggestion of a threesome? It won't be as bad as you think

[clytaemnestra]

1 hour ago, Elton said:

@carlo you are such a lucky guy, why don't you accept that suggestion of a threesome? It won't be as bad as you think

I agree, I as a woman would like to try it also, but mfm. It has nothing to do with love, it's just sex.

[Argue]

Wait so you're a guy? You're girlfriend is asking you for a threesome that includes you, her, and another girl? Do it dude! 

[Guest]

Sounds like your gf is your future fuck-buddy and open relationship mate.

Haha, I can see it before my eyes, the look on your face when you first hear that...the dooming realization that your girl wants to fuck someone else and asks for your persmission. That she will always want to fuck another woman and you probably will never be enough for her. It's almost like cheating, like the beginning if the end. I find this so funny because I can perfectly understand what you are going through, I can literally feel your pain. 

Don't expect most of the people to understand this pain, and shrug off those shallow phrases "Come on man. Are you gay? This is the dream, just do it!" Those are of no help to you. 

You realize that if you don't do it, she will always have this in her mind, and she will maybe even think less of you. Maybe she will leave you or cheat on you because she want to follow her desire.

But also if you do it, there are risks that she will fuck that other girl more often because she thinks thats ok now. Maybe she want more and more, and there are chances she will ultimately leave you for that other girl because she loves to fuck her more. I have heard a lot if horrible stories about the aftermath of threesomes.

She will never be yours again. Good, let it go. Because she never was yours.

My only advice for you is to listen to your heart. If you want a exclusive, monogamous relationship that is happy and you can trust the girl then you most likely need to find another women now. But you can keep your current gf as a fuckbuddy or open relationship material until you have a new one. 

I'm sorry that you have to go through this, but it will make you grow stronger. Just do what you feel is right and not what someone is expecting from you. Your own happiness is at play.

[Nathalie]

@carlo Perhaps it comes from a quiet other direction..

You alone know, in what kind of situation she asked, how she asked, how she looked like as she asked etc..

Could it eventually be that she only miss something which you would be able to give her too?

Is she or are you both a little to shy to speak openly about what you like.. you know what i mean..?

I think, no sensitive person would ask his/her partner for a threesome, just like that, without thinking about how he or she would probably react..

Find the reason out, i imagine it's surely crucial for you.. and where ever it leads you would at least have the opportunity to grow thanks openess

[Will]

@carlo

As above. I guess there is allot to assume.. It could be an awsome opportunity for you here.. You could learn allot and have an experience that not many get access to.. Of course it may change the dynamics going forward but you have to see it as an opportunity to expand not only for you but for here too.. its clear she is keen to experiment and discover more about herself and you..

I think its a great opportunity..

If you lose that relationship. who cares..Plenty of fish in the sea.. I think its a fair price to pay for helping her find herself and for you learning something about yourself??

Of course if you dont need or want to learn about it then so be it..

In general though when people around you want to try something new, why would we want to restrict that.

I feel you had an opportunity to be intimate with one another on a different level..

So many sides to this though, like everyone one above it could mean so many things.. Up to you to know yourself where you would like to go what you would like to experience.. I would not be trying to hold someone back though that will always end badly..

 

In conclusion, never hold anyone back. If you cant go with them maybe time to let them go.. what do you think???

[clytaemnestra]

I as a woman would agree on threesome if my partner wants it and if our sex life becomes boring. Why not, it is just a sex and it can be funny.