Being Ignored

[Princess01]

I recently broke up with my boyfriend who I'd been with on and off for 8 years.  It was a moment of being overwhelmed and I overreacted and broke up with him.  After 3 weeks of no contact I did call him and left a message to say that I had cooled off and can we talk about the relationship.  He never responded.  Over the last 4 months I have sent him 2 heart felt emails explaining what I had been going through, telling him I want us to be together again etc. but he has not responded at all.  

The truth of the matter is, I had become overwhelmed because he is an alcoholic (albeit functioning, attorney, responsible, etc).  But he does not drive so I had been left with the task of shuttling him to and fro, quite often.  Honestly, I'd walk to the ends of the earth for this man, but he gave me nothing in return other than a comfy friendship and occasionally sex but even that was very sterile.  No kissing, foreplay.  I realize he has issues but after giving giving giving and getting nothing in return, I finally cracked.   the good parts of the relationship really made me happy and I miss him in my life so much.

He had a little dog that absolutely adored me and I adored it.  This is also very, very painful.  I know he knows how much he is hurting me by ignoring me and I question why I would even want someone around that could hurt me this much.  However, I suppose me coming out of nowhere and breaking up with him probably caught him off guard and really really hurt him.  

I guess my question is . . . do I keep trying by professing my love and hope that eventually he'll come back . . . or do I let it go?  

[Isle of View]

Go for a walk outside. Quite place. Beach. Forrest. Park. Look around and go out of your head (I mean put your attention out from your mind and on the environment). Do it as long as it takes.

There is no way for us to know what you should or could do (or what was triggered by your friend). Only you can know, and the best way to know is to go out of your thoughts.

The answer will present to you. You actually know it, but you seem to fight the thing you know and are hung up in indecision (it seems).

Try it. Go for a walk. Maybe it even takes some days until you accept your inner truth.

 

Kind regards, 
Chris

[Princess01]

Thanks Chris.  You're right, inside me, I do know.  Just hard to let go.

[clytaemnestra]

On 3/6/2016 at 0:21 AM, Princess01 said:

he is an alcoholic

 

On 3/6/2016 at 0:21 AM, Princess01 said:

he does not drive

 

On 3/6/2016 at 0:21 AM, Princess01 said:

he gave me nothing in return

 

On 3/6/2016 at 0:21 AM, Princess01 said:

occasionally sex but even that was very sterile.  No kissing, foreplay

 

On 3/6/2016 at 0:21 AM, Princess01 said:

giving giving giving and getting nothing in return

and after all of that

On 3/6/2016 at 0:21 AM, Princess01 said:

I miss him in my life so much

 

[Lynnel]

@Princess01 I wrote a full guide today for people like you

 

You may be addicted to abusive partenrs so you definetly wanna explore that part of yourself to check whether it could be true or not

Edited March 9, 2016 by Lynnel

[Will]

I have the feeling she was attracted to his career and his leadership in his career and also that he was detached from the relationship.. I can imagine its nice for a woman to have the ability to desire a guy if she chooses.. whereas its pretty rare that girls get the chance to be with a guy who is so detached.. BUT.. he is probably detached for unhealthy reason like inability to be vulnerable and very closed off.. I think once she learns why this is an unhealthy thing she may understand that that is a dependant relationship and can never be  a sustainable thing.. He has a bit of growing to do..