What to do if you have toxic family member?

[DaveB]

What to do if you have toxic family member?

So I know im not alone in this, but my family especially my grandmother, is very social conditioning , guvernment worshiping, "9-17 only solution" person.

I living in big city in small appartment alone, but sometimes I have go to visit them, usually once a week.

I thinking visiting them even less or not at all, I know all my frieds dealing with this the same way...visiting family once a month or move abroad.

Is this the best solution? avoiding the close onces? I heart from one life coutch that he have clients that move tousends miles away from they parents/family and they are still in their heads.

I still of course love them and they probably want be living so long, because they are old. I don't want to regret later, that I avoid them.

How are you dealing with this?

 

thank you

[Psyche_92]

Leo has a good video on this topic. 

 

[Nahm]

@DaveB The variety is nice. 

[DaveB]

@Psyche_92 Thx its help me.

[Elisabeth]

"Toxic" is a pretty strong word for someone who has a traditional worldview.

Also notice how the fact that you're bothered by her judgement points to your own insecurities to your chosen path.

So, as an alternative to moving across the continent, you could try questioning your thoughts. 

Here's a self-inquiry process I'm currently learning. It's especially great for issues like this.  http://thework.com/en/do-work

The idea is to drop unrealistic expectations and untrue stories your family. Then we can enjoy the aspects of your relationship that are enjoyable, and not overreact to those which aren't.  

Byron Katie has got plenty of videos on youtube, maybe you can relate to this one?

 

Edited April 11, 2018 by Elisabeth

[Barbarian Number 8]

@DaveB

Time is your friend. Grandmothers tend to be old........

Avoid the rest. See how and if the develop.