Too tired to work on myself

[Guest grrmz]

Hello all,

Personal development feels too hard. I have so many emotional problems and more and more things keep happening that overwhelm me so I don’t really get the point of doing it and just feel like I will always be depressed so what’s the point? Too many traumatic things have happened to me and it will take too long for me to get over it. What do you do when you feel this way?

[AllanGR]

Hello grrmz,

I hope at least you're trying Leo's approach which is to become self aware, succeeding you'll understand.

It's easy for me to state, emotional problems are illusions.  That if you stop thinking about them, they'll go away.  I mean, if I thought like you I'd have the same problems as you, wouldn't I?  I would, but I don't, so I don't have your problems.

The apparent difference between you and I is, I have a purpose, and my energies are focused on that.  The purpose of a vehicle is to keep on the road to achieve a destination.  There are video clips of vehicles without purpose falling off roads and crashing into other vehicles.  A purpose is useful.  Not having one is a problem.

So what do you want?  Decide and get on with it.

[i am I AM]

This might seem too deep, but, the part you talk about emotional problems. Is "emotions" the problem? If not (in what you perceive), what makes that a problem/s?

[Rebec]

Jordan B. Peterson has a good suggestion in his self authoring program (www.selfauthoring.com).

He suggest that when you write your "next-five" year plan; write one how you want it to be. And write one which is your worst case (like no self development at all. Ask yourself where will you end up, if that's the case?)

And a good start in my opinion is to deal with something what is bothering you the most at this moment (even a little thing). When you see the result of these things resolve in your life, maybe you will feel motivated to tackle some bigger issues.

Once you start digging there will be more crap coming up. And I know this can feel very demotivating. But at the same time, when you start digging you will feel so much better / lighter about yourself, and results will come fast (especially with the little issues). 

Good luck! ?

 

[AuthenticMeli]

@grrmz Hi there. 

I think it is okay to take a break from while to while. I noticed that whenever I tried too hard to do personal development I was so stressed. When I saw the list of what I can do to self actualize I was like yeah but no. I did not do anything for months but even then I used this time to gain information about myself. Like if I would feel depressed I  tried to observe my depressive thoughts, sometimes writing them down, sometimes just listening. Sometimes I did this for one minute or less, sometimes for an hour.

I try to view this whole self development thing as a "work in progress". The days I feel like doing no self development I do not do it. The days I feel like doing it I do it I do it. I continue whenever I feel like it. Right now my goal is to find out what makes "feel like doing it". 

I hope you will find a solution for yourself 

[pluto]

Try this http://www.bravermantest.com/

You may have chemical deficiencies that may need correcting.

 

[Martita]

Self care. 

Indulge in what feels good. 

Watch a show you love, go out and pet animals at pet store. 

Take a bubble bath. 

Sleep. 

Take it easy on yourself and allow some space for just a little light by doing things you know will feel good. 

Call a friend. Paint a picture. Whatever works for you. 

There's no rush to development. Be patient with yourself and take it day by day. The momentum will come back.