How to Start Loving for Beginners

[Solace]

I wanted to share this on the main forum from my journal. I hope you can find some wisdom in this that can help guide you to a deeper state of love, which I feel is foundational information for anyone into spirituality. Enjoy, use what is useful, discard what is not :

The first thing I want you to know is that love, although the simplest practice in existence is also the hardest. It is simple because all you have to do is sit with your emotions. This is where I started, I aimed for about a minute of feeling a few times a day and kept going until feeling become apart of life. I remember when I first used statements in my head such as "You are beautiful" or "I love you dear one" because the man in me felt rather embarrassed. Embarrassment turns out to be, from experience, a way the ego falls apart, so be OK with embarrassment. Another strange phenomena started manifesting and this was, the more I said loving things and focused on that, the more dark thoughts and suppressed feelings from years of hiding them in addictive behaviors suddenly arose. I expected to feel more love, not anger  But that is the power of complimenting yourself etc. Compliments/loving words magnetically pull these emotions to the surface, as Gabe Salomon told me, and this blew my mind. This means we start with feeling first, then to speed up the healing of the karma/cellular debris  in our cells (gathered from our parents, social conditioning, and and past lifetimes) which are released in the form of emotions, we only focus on speaking love through our words (in and outside our head) and through our actions. Let's have a quick practical example! So my Mum and I were on the beach with my dog, and this man comes up to us and starts speaking loudly about how we must be blind to have not seen a no dog sign, and commanded us to leave the beach. It was the yelling which hurt my heart, which I interpreted as a lack of empathy for a fellow human being. I just said to him, against all of my ego, and where my own angry emotions were leading me,  in the most feminine voice a man could speak without getting looked strange at, "Thank you so much for telling us about that. Without you we wouldn't have known this important information that our dog is not allowed here. I'm sorry that we have bothered you in this way, have an amazing day man". Immediately we all felt better because the loving environment was created for the anger to leave our cells at record speeds, and for calmness to replace it like no other. The guy was shocked and began almost running away, because egos don't know how to respond to love  

This leads me to another amazing cornerstone of loving whatever arises: the stronger the emotion you love, the more healing takes place. And usually the emotions is so strong that your thoughts will distract you from knowing it is there, so a pro tip is whenever you have lots of thoughts feel into your heart and intestinal region and if it's strong, love the crap out of it. In addition, setting the intention to love something so much that it explodes into a million universes of abundance (or whatever word you like) sets you up for success. And a key is before starting any activity for our love beginners, set an intention for it to go well, especially in meditation does it help to call all of your spirit guides, God, your guardian angels; and your past, present and future loved ones to assist you in being absolutely present minded, for sleep too I have woken up after 5 and a half hours sleep feeling great after intending for it to be deeply healing for my muscles and mind, so play around with that too. 

So where to start from here? If you're interested in enlightenment, or are wanting the most trans formative and foundational practice I have personally found, begin to stay with an emotion for 10 seconds once, twice and as many times as you can throughout the day, and slowly working our way up to a minute or so, and starting to say beautiful things (the more embarrassing the better) to yourself and other. People can only meet you as deeply as you meet yourself, so if you don't understand yourself, others won't be able to understand you for in both cases you are the receiver. The truth is we have placed much of our attention on finally getting that external validation from another human beings which means that you are not ready for it, because you can't even receive it. And God purposefully doesn't give you external love because he doesn't want you living in an illusion of complacency, he wants you to turn inwards, wake the fuck up, and finally realize that only you can give yourself the things you want from other people. You are life's eternal liberator, you are God, so start living like one and send blessings left right and center like a benevolent God would!

I say this because we always do this on a subconscious level from the years of conditioning which shaped our world view, and now every experience is filtered through that world view to give it meaning (and the default one is biased towards giving anything a negative meaning). So what we are doing by saying "I love you" to anything, especially if you don't like it, is physically rewiring your brain, because you are now creating a new default world view filled with love consciously that will eventually become subconscious. Scientifically, changing our world view triggers the pain receptors in our brains, that's how you know you are rewiring your subconscious mind. In addition, pain is how emotions are released out of our cells that we have left in the darkest corners of our bodies because we were so afraid to face that discomfort, but I want to tell you, that the discomfort is really your liberator. The pain of feeling an emotion leaving also removes all thoughts or traumatic experiences linked to that specific emotion and transforms it into neutrality/light/love where it no longer triggers you emotionally. SO thoughts trigger us emotionally, that's interesting? If thoughts are just like physical reality, wouldn't that mean that physical reality could also be triggering karmic emotions in my cellular memory linked to an conditioned experience I had where I ran away from that innocent emotion? And what if the experiences in physical reality that trigger these emotions are not driven by mechanical subatomic particles, but by a divine force that science has yet to realize, which is only serving in our highest favor for us as human beings to raise our default vibration to where heaven exists all of the time, instead of in a few seconds doses of dopamine I get from checking my social media etc? Doesn't that sound something worth pursuing if it would take only a few weeks of constant "I love you's" in your head to free yourself of your ego, and so with it, any need for anything to externally fulfill you, which makes you into your most authentic self, where you can feel understood by even a burst of air, and live without any conditioned childhood blockages that may have stopped you from living your highest excitement/passion? Or shall I sell myself to my own thoughts and feelings, and get lost in them, instead of loving them for helping me grow, and die without ever experiencing the  deepest intimacy and joy everyone wants? When will you stop searching for happiness, and just be your own infinite source of happiness?

What is your answer to these? Do you feel excited in your heart region? If so, that's confirmation that this is true, and is what your body wants you to give it as an ongoing present, in return for it giving you existence. Every emotion is but an innocent 5 year old child in pain, and it wants you to sit with it, hold it, and not run out of the house or put it in a cold, hard cell again. Just like a 5 year old child, the emotion will never give up on your love, and will only come back stronger until you sit with it. I mean the same emotion from when you are 10 years old could be the same emotion when you are 60 years old that you've not looked at because of the pain, but as we've discussed the pain is the deepest sign of healing. With time, once you clear all karmic emotions as every single human being will do in this planet either in this lifetime but most likely another, will enlightenment arrive, and the kundalini energy flow because all emotional blockages are gone. This is the deeper reason we are here on this planet, the circumstances don't matter, but the meaning we give them does. This means you don't have to do anything about your circumstances, because love will attract the circumstances you want in your life through "opportunities" and your job is to see these opportunities and follow them. This is quite advanced, but you know that an opportunity of this nature has been divinely brought to you when you feel excitement in your heart when you think of following it, so do just that; there's no need to be afraid of what happens if you do it because you choose how that experience is for you. Embarrassing yourself publicly can finally be seen as a gift!

One final word on Karma. The circumstances that come your way in each moment, are karmic to begin with, so be prepared. One such circumstance happened almost a year ago. I was with a beautiful, and kind-hearted person in June last year and had never felt so deep with another anyone in my life. The universe had other plans, and we left each other not long after. The sheer amount of emotions having  party in my body was so painful that I shut down, and started to lose all focus at school, grades plummeting, and the world falling apart. It took me months until I decided to look at these emotions of rejection,and sadness because the pain of not feeling them was becoming greater; the child-like emotions were starting to use extreme methods to get my attention lets just say! And so the deepest healing of my life occurred, and I'm grateful it happened, and scared at the same time that if that was only a tiny amount of karma, imagine the full dose! Everything happens for a reason, and that reason is love. Be love, cherish your experiences, follow what excites you, and be OK with pain. 

Thank you all for your time, and for sharing this space with me. You are more worthy and deserving than you know. This process can be long or short depending on your ability to love. This is all of human suffering explained, and the beginning of a new life for some. Take this perspective with you and it will serve you well <3

Edited April 7, 2018 by Solace

[Guest Quanty]

Only the Awakened Being can only know Love. Other sleepy heads have concepts of love.

 

<3

[universe]

Beautiful thread 

[Marten]

Wow, thanks for the reminder... really resonates with me, great examples ❤️

Once I was riding the bus, and a young man came in the front and looked at me with a challenging stare, the way men do sometimes to scare each other into submission. At that time I had just started trying out metta (loving kindness) energy in my responses to others, all I did was look at him and smile - from my heart - and it shocked him so much his face turned red and he immediately sat down in the front of the bus. It was really funny.

Love is the most powerful force. ?

[Tonypop100]

Thank you