Curing addiction to entertainment / stimulation

[OnceMore]

I've only just realised how incredibly addicted I am to entertainment. When listing my addictions (also including porn and sugar), I have also listed entertainment, but it would be at the bottom of the list. But now, I am sure it is number one; I literally cannot do anything without having some form of entertainment or stimulation on in the background. 

When I am eating, I will have a video or podcast on. When I am walking or on the bus or on the train, I will have a podcast on. When I wake up in the morning, I immediately reach for my phone so that I can search for something new to watch/read/listen to. I have trouble falling asleep, so I put on a video or podcast and lie down so that eventually I can fall asleep. Even when I am watching a movie, which is a form of entertainment itself, I am flicking through my phone for some more stimulation! How insane is that?! Stimulation within stimulation! I don't even study without having something on in the background. Every single spare moment I have I immediately get out my phone and search for something. 

And here is the worst part: I don't even give a shit about the thing I am being stimulated by. I don't care about the content of the podcasts, movies, videos, music etc that I engage in. The content rarely matters. What matters I think is that as long as there is something that is keeping my attention occupied and is focused away from me and my life, then that is okay. 

So for sure I am heavily, heavily addicted to being entertained and being stimulated 24/7. 

Any advice on how to defeat this addiction? I am definitely making this priority number one right now, as it has only become plain to me the utter ridiculous nature of what I am doing. This is no way to live. 

The problem I think I will have is this: Life without the entertainment or stimulation is going to be immensely more boring than life is without the stimulation. Or it will be at the start. 

edit: Plus I am not even sure if I should add books to this list. 

Edited April 2, 2018 by OnceMore

[Random-Hero95]

I know how you feel. 

Right now, we're in the kind of society where it's pretty hard to dodge entertainment, so don't worry if you're constantly being showered by it. 

Firstly, you've addressed the matter, and you're aware how immersed you are right now, which is good. You've also realised the worst part - it's not intellectually stimulating. 

Secondly, don't feel as if you completely need to detach yourself from everything, that's the last thing you want to do. 

Here's what I'd suggest;

Focus on what you're listening to, or what you're reading/watching/etc. If you're listening to a podcast, make it one that's educational, or something that can carry some substance within your field of practise. If you enjoy, or you're into clinical psychology, listen to Joe Rogan ft Jordan Peterson. If you're studying to be a doctor, fall asleep watching a documentary, you get the idea. 

Next, once you're content with the entertainment in your life, start to shorten it by self control. I went through a period where I turned my phone off for the majority of the day, and I'd only have it on during set hours. Why? So I'd appreciate and enjoy the finer things in life, people watch, embrace my surroundings, etc. Fall asleep with nothing in the background, and all the lights off. One step at a time, acknowledge and eradicate each thing slowly one by one, until you've lessened your entertainment intake by 60%. It's easier said than done, but it'll become a natural habit over time. Another good example is, don't turn on your phone until 2 hours have passed since you've woken up. Instead, go for a run, do a home work out, shower and have breakfast  - all with no background noise/entertainment. You can do it, it's all in your hands. 

I'd also say plan a trip away, and keep your phone off for the whole weekend. I went away on my own for 3 days. I sat down and informed my parents where I'd be staying, where I'd be travelling to, and who to call in case of an emergency, (Airbnb). I had no issues, and it was the best weekend I had in a while. The detox felt great, and I really felt at one with life. 

I'm no expert, but like I said, I know how you feel. 

You'll figure it out - I'm not worried about you. 
 

[lmfao]

@OnceMore

I have the exact same problem myself. I've been meditating consistently for three months, and it's only recently that the problem has slowly started to change for me. 

I constantly walk around my house with my phone and headphones. Whether I'm eating, cooking, sitting, lying down, on the toilet, I'll want to be on my phone. I used to even listen to YouTube when falling asleep cuz I feel that addicted. When I try to address the problem, you start to realise just how messed up and jumbled up your mind is. I'm going to reference some of the ideas in these videos, I think they are really worth your time 

2 hours ago, OnceMore said:

 

 

I want you to test something. Unplug from your stimulation, and pay attention to how your feeling. You'll probably notice that you feel low, depressed, maybe anxious, empty, completely unmotivated and etc. All these feelings are present, even when you're sucked into your stimulation. You're compulsive behaviour is motivated by these negative feelings you're trying to bury, and you might not even realise that you're doing this until you develop mindfulness. 

Now, these sorts of feelings are extremely deep-rooted. Perhaps you have chemical imbalances in your brain due to the effects of your destructive habits molding you over time. 

Exercise. Intense cardio and weightlifting can get your mood up. I exercise in the morning so as to get a good start to the day. It will improve your mood, and make you less neurotic and dependent on stimulation. Try practice mindfulness when exercising, by being at peace with the pain. 

And another thing, FIX YOUR DIET (if you haven't already). Makes all the difference to your energy levels and mood. Same goes for sleeping routine. If I eat loads of unhealthy carbs I get a food coma and I get sleepy as fuck, and I can't be bothered to do anything. 

I don't know if you do this already, but practice meditation. If you have a focused meditation session, you can feel your neurosis melting away. You become satisfied with the present moment. I meditated for over one hour today (more than I usually do) , and near the end of it, my legs were in intense pain. But I felt my ego dissolve, and I came to peace with the pain by appreciating the present moment. 

By meditating and exercising, hopefully you're mind is in a positive enough state that you can start more good habits and hobbies, and fix the various parts of your broken life. If you really are 24/7 addicted, your life is likely a mess.  This is where your "life purpose" stuff can come into play. For example, I'm a guy in school right now and I've got exams in a couple of months now, and I need really high grades to get into university. The only problem is that I procrastinate a lot, and its something I need to overcome. You likely have problems in your life which you put off facing due to your low mood and addiction. By fixing the circumstances you find yourself in, you'll only find it easier to grow. 

The advice I'm giving comes from personal experience. 

Edited April 2, 2018 by lmfao

[TimStr]

@OnceMore

If you want a quick and dirty fix: do a 10 day vipassana retreat

After that retreat, commit yourself to a 90d no multitasking challang for integration. (Depending on how you set this up, you may allow for some entertainment (so and so many h per day / per week...), or at least some form of relaxation, that fills the place, that entertainment abstinence leaves.) This will be extremely hard, but the 10 day retreat should ease with the withdrawl symptoms a bit. Be especially mindful of how distraction and entertainment cravings slowly creep back into your life.

Also spend more time of your day distraction free - just you yourself by yourself - and build a rock solid meditation routine (do nothing, vipassana, or labeling). Move more towards lifestyle minimalism.

Also think about what aspects of yourself you want to be distracted of. Ego creates distraction because it can't face truth. Its crucial to find out what parts your ego consists of to get some initial leverage. This boils down to your greatest fears. Do you hate feeling alone? Do you hate feeling lazy because you are afraid of failure? Do you hate feeling bored, because it leaves you feeling useless? What do you run away from, so that you end up in a place of entertainment seeking?

[KMB4222]

One helpful method I've tried is to track my media/entertainment, etc intake over the course of a few weeks. I try not to restrict myself too much during this time because what I'm looking for is an accurate measure of what and how much of it I am consuming. Create a chart listing the following:

1. type of activity (be specific, such as naming the game you play, or the podcast you listened to).

2. how long you spent engaging in the activity

3. how many minutes of the media you actually enjoyed or felt were worth the time for you (this one is a bit tricky, because this is the part where you will feel as if you are giving something up, or about to, and your ego will try to convince you that you need these things)

In this way you can get a better idea of what you actually get out of the activity, rather than spending time on it just out of habit. The first step in curing an addiction or habit is being aware of it and how you feel about it. Over time, certain habits will fall away because your personal growth will take precedence over them. Just be honest with yourself about why you engage in them and what your priorities are. 

As for the fear of getting bored without the stimulation, that's because the ego wants the easiest form of stimulation it can get. 

Once you start cutting back on your media intake, the excitement of the moment just as it is will slowly begin to reveal itself.

[Hyperspace]

I am also working on overcoming some time wasting and destructive habits and addictions (social media scrolling, youtube, staying too late at night and waking up late in the day .. etc)

But the way I am approaching this problem is by being aware and mindful of my self while "unconsciously" doing these habits, and by trying to really be aware of how they can be time wasting and destructive in the long run, you need to continuously remind yourself of that, A daily meditation habit IMO can be the best tool to help you in doing so.

It can be quite difficult for many of us in this age of technology to give up all of these forms of entertainment and stimulations or even avoid them, but I will share with you my approach from my personal experience:

1) Be mindful of your self while you are doing the habit or about to do it (which is usually on autopilot mode), watch your self closely and think through the justifications that you give yourself at that very moment.

2) Always, be aware of how destructive and time wasting this habit can be in the long run, and keep reminding your self of that when you get the urge to do it (stop doing it on automatic mode, switch to manual).

3) Try to find the real root causes of your addictions, (what is it that you are trying to avoid by distracting yourself with continuous entertainment and stimulation), and deal with it ! (Leo has a great video on this > Overcoming addiction)

4) Try to slowly substitute your means of entertainment, with something constructive (audio books, educational videos, Lectures .. etc), don't consume any thing.  Instead, always ask yourself, is the form of entertainment that I'l be using now, positive and helping me somehow in growing and improving my self and giving me some new helpful insights, or no ?  
Now of course am not saying to cut all forms of entertainment at once and totally replace them with only educational stuff and audio books, but what I am saying is Be AWARE & MINDFUL of what you do, and slowly replace the bad habits and addictions with constructive ones, It might be challenging at first but things will get quite easy with time.

Edited April 5, 2018 by Hyperspace

[Epiphany_Inspired]

@OnceMore Wow, you got so many incredible/ insightful responses, I have tasted them all .... and they are pure, true and so sweet... like trays of tropical fruit... these awesome answers have helped me a lot too... so....  I am equally grateful for the question  

[Salvijus]

 

[Joseph Maynor]

Look at this from a systems thinking perspective.  What you do is what meets all your needs.  So, don’t try and radically change things.  Work from within the system to try to wire in healthier replacements to what you are already doing.  Work slowly.  Don’t try to dump the table over.  What you are doing already has a system homeostasis to it.  You want to effectuate change by working from a bubble inside the system and slowly work outward.  If you start to dump things too hastily, you’re gonna get a huge backlash.

[OnceMore]

@Joseph Maynor I hear you. Since I started this topic I tried to make the commitment of: No more TV, movies, sports, porn, news etc. I did well for a few days, entertaining myself with books and actually working out, but then one day I watched a movie. Then watched another. Then since I already started the backsliding, I started reading news and then watching porn again and etc. 

Is this a case of taking baby steps and working with the system I already have vs. one big upheaval of the system? 

[Salvijus]

@OnceMore If you deny yourself pleasure you will never will. Not in a million years.

If deny something, for example, sugar, then some other addictions will come up. If you deny yourself that, then again something will come up.

As long as you don't know how to be peaceful joyful blissful by your own nature, you will fight those addictions non stop.

[Salvijus]

@OnceMore a desire for pleasure is not going to go away. Never.

There're only 2 ways to deal with that. 

1. Putting pleasure from outside (this will create dependency and addictions)

2. Creating a chemistry of blissfulness from within. (This you can use how much you want to)

Choose wisely

Edited April 17, 2018 by Salvijus

[Martita]

Every addiction is about one thing: Running from Self. 

Trying to pull away from facing yourself keeps you wanting to focus on those things outside of yourself. 

In order to break that addiction you have to learn to be ok with sitting with yourself. 

Theres nothing to run from then. 

(FYI: Boredom is also running from self. There isn't actually boredom. It's just an inability to sit with yourself.)

So how can you learn to be ok with sitting with yourself? 

I'd start with practicing just five minutes a day.

Let go of everything for five minutes.

See where that takes you. 

 

 

[Leo Gura]

@OnceMore 10 day solo meditation retreat.

Just do it!

[blazed]

Homeostasis, emotional labour, resistence and procrastination wreck people.

I wish there was an easy cure or magic pill, but if it were that easy everyone will be moderately successful...

[junglove]

Hi there,

I feel your pain! I started tracking my TV/Netflix consumption a while back, and it has really helped me trim down... after a while of keeping a record of time spent in netflix-trance, it stops feeling so good... 

And if you ever feel like you're missing out of some good show, remember that nobody ever went to their grave wishing they'd watched more TV..

Lucas

[Guest Quanty]

Awakening will cut any unnecessary distraction automatically.