Enlightenment Jokes Here

[jse]

Bertha Jaylnn Jo, just moments away from her glorious enlightenment:

[Shin]

 

Edited December 14, 2017 by Shin

[Monkey-man]

Zen devilry: (sounds better when said with Stewy's (family guy) voice)

Mom: Hey go wash dishes

Me: I don't exist

...

or

Mom: Hey go wash dishes

Me: Dishes do not exist. 

...

or

Mom: Hey go wash dishes

Me: You don't exist (this one is dangerous to say for your own non-existence sake)

..

or

Mom: Hey go wash dishes

Me: There is no object-subject relationships, hence there are neither me to wash dishes nor dishes to be washed, there is only infinite consciousness expressing itself in the form of dish-washing

...

or

Mom: Hey go wash dishes

Me: Dishes will wash themselves, they are GOD.

...

or

Mom: Hey go wash dishes

Me: I'm high-conscious individual, I operate on high vibrational frequencies. I don't wash dishes, my low-vibrational mother. From now on, you add: 'your high-vibrational grace', 'your infinite wisdom', ' your absolute power', 'all-loving and all-forgiving', 'unseen', 'unborn', 'father of dragons', 'breaker of chains', 'your beautiful light', whenever you dare to speak to me, mortal woman.

...

Mom: I gave you birth, I have ungrateful son!

Me: actually...I gave birth to myself

Edited December 14, 2017 by Monkey-man

[Natasha]

@Monkey-man

[Ayilton]

On 3/5/2016 at 8:59 AM, Ayla said:

The difference between a sage and a worm ?  

The sage can dance and the worm cant  ?????

[Shin]

When you watch the "40 Signs That You Are Neurotic - Understanding Neurosis" video from Leo

And you have 0 symptom

According to Leo, I'm enlightened 

 

Edited December 16, 2017 by Shin

[Dodo]

22 hours ago, Shin said:

When you watch the "40 Signs That You Are Neurotic - Understanding Neurosis" video from Leo

And you have 0 symptom

According to Leo, I'm enlightened 

 

Not so fast! Counter argument coming. Your bodymind has 0 of these signs, but you're not that, so you have 40 ?

If another bodymind has 40 of these signs, they are not that and hence have 0 of them ?

I contemplated this a bit further and less jokey - the present moment awareness with which we know our experience (the thing we refer to when we say I) always has 0 neuroses. 

Only form can have neurosis, so perhaps the way is for the form to tune into the frequency of awareness and realise it also is pure awareness. Then the form will become a Shin and will have achieved Shinhood.

Edited December 17, 2017 by Dodo

[Shin]

When you've been "this" close to surrender ...

 

[Truth Seekah]

[Dodo]

 

[AleksM]

[Sri McDonald Trump Maharaj]

 

[pluto]

5 hours ago, AleksM said:

The moment you realize the jokes on you I remember some days i would wake up very early and type away sometimes almost an hour straight finally stopping and wondering how in the world did i write all of this without thinking? Where did it all come from and i literally took no breaks, information flowed without effort.

[pluto]

When the Enlightened Master responds with the Question in itself.

 

Edited December 21, 2017 by pluto

[Shin]

When you see a thread with a star, but you forgot what you said in it

 

 

[Truth Seekah]

[Shanmugam]

[Shin]

When you say you're enlightened, on Actualized.org ...

 

 

 

@Shanmugam No one does that 

Edited December 23, 2017 by Shin

[Toby]

[Shanmugam]

@Shin  I have seen people doing it.. Especially if the title of a thread is a question...