Crazy_Monkey_Brain

Need genuine relationship advice

9 posts in this topic

My girlfriend thinks I'm disrespectful and that I only want her for her body, I've been on the path of growth for a while and been doing my meditation practices and I don't feel like I need it, as I enjoy other aspects, we were getting touchy feely, but she freaked out and said I was only using her for her body, and quite abruptly threw me out her house, I can see how from her perspective how, due to my high sex drive, I also went through her messages because I was been a sneaky mornon and rightly so she thinks I don't trust her and shows the amount of disrespect I have for her, now I'm on the waiting line, she said I was on my last chace a few days ago and I honestly think this was the last straw, she's been ignoring me, and I don't know what to say or do, I keep trying to meditate away the problem but no luck, the fear of being alone and not having the validation of her is stressful, (yes I have the pathetic emotional issues). It took me forever to find her and I have felt so happy being with her I have learned so much about myself through this, help me, I really need advice. 

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Alright get on the black market and buy some chloroform and then go to her house and kidnap her....

Na I’m kidding ?

Although painful, ending a relationship can sometimes be the most beneficial thing for a person. Maybe you need to have that false sense of happiness stripped away from you in order to continue your growth. Lean into the pain and suffer consciously. Stay aware during your suffering and you will grow from it. 

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Think of it from her perspective. Why would she say you only want her for her body? You're probably only projecting a sexual intention, and not focusing on building a genuine, true, emotional connection with her. Women can tell when you're present with them, but they can also tell when your mind is off in other places and not really with them. They can also tell the fuckboys from the gentleman lovers. Her needs also need to be met, you can't just focus on yourself, or a relationship can never blossom out of that place of selfishness.

Develop some empathy. Take the feedback you get from women. Learn how to emotionally connect with them, instead of just view them as a sex object for your pleasure. I'm not saying sexual projection is bad, because it's a good thing, but it sounds like you're leaning too heavily on that and you're coming off as a sleazy creep. Learn to back up and create space, and read how she responds to your words and actions. Obviously if she's putting up resistence, you need to recalibrate and adjust to the situation.

And don't wait on any woman. That's not empowering behavior.

Edited by Frylock

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@Crazy_Monkey_Brain You’re mentally assigned things like trust, peace of mind, and love - to her. There’s only you. Self inquire, investigate. When did I first develop trut issues? Why would I think the love experienced by me, is somehow coming from someone else? 


MEDITATIONS TOOLS  ActualityOfBeing.com  GUIDANCE SESSIONS

NONDUALITY LOA  My Youtube Channel  THE TRUE NATURE

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53 minutes ago, Nahm said:

@Crazy_Monkey_Brain You’re mentally assigned things like trust, peace of mind, and love - to her. There’s only you. Self inquire, investigate. When did I first develop trut issues? Why would I think the love experienced by me, is somehow coming from someone else? 

You actually are not. You can do whathever you want.

 

The thing is, when you overcome this, you actually WANT to do these things like loving her instead of doing that but it comes from a place of genuiness, not shoulds

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@Ether i@Nahmits not that I don't love her, it just that I seem to project the opposite intensional to how I feel, at this point I'm not sure if theres anything I can say or do to fix the situation, even if relationships are in Leo's view kinda stupid, I have become more self aware learned a lot about myself and made growth

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2 hours ago, Ether said:

You actually are not. You can do whathever you want.

 

The thing is, when you overcome this, you actually WANT to do these things like loving her instead of doing that but it comes from a place of genuiness, not shoulds

typo. I meant you’ve not you’re. lol. kinda made it opposite. nice catch. thanks 


MEDITATIONS TOOLS  ActualityOfBeing.com  GUIDANCE SESSIONS

NONDUALITY LOA  My Youtube Channel  THE TRUE NATURE

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