Narcissistic abuse and PTSD/CPTSD

[SpaceCowboy]

Hi folks,

I grew up with my narcissistic mother, which led to enormous emotional and psychological pain over the years. Now, I try to deal with the symptoms of PTSD after the many years of abuse. Has somebody gone through the same thing? How long did it take you to recover? Could you recover at all? I'm a little bit scared that I suffered irreversible brain damage because of the intense traumatic experiences.

Appreciate your anwers.

[Ether]

still trying to recover

[Nadie]

Still trying to recover except from a narcissistic father. I've wondered about the brain damage thing too. I believe that can fully heal though. 

[Sri McDonald Trump Maharaj]

I also have a narcissistic mother and also a pretty abusive father. Journaling, therapy(with a good therapist), having good boundaries, leaving abusive people behind and getting in touch with the body has helped and still helps me a lot. RIchard Grannons videos are pretty good. I've heard good stuff about the book "Drama of the Gifted Child" by Alice Miller.

Good luck!

Edited May 8, 2018 by Sri McDonald Trump Maharaj

[lmfao]

@SpaceCowboy (mobile site won't let me delete these blue boxes) @Sri McDonald Trump Maharaj

I'm living with a narcissistic mother at the moment, but I'm 17 and am going to university soon anyway which is good. My relationship with her is complex, since most of time her negativity is not directed towards me but to my father and it is even her good traits that are sometimes directed towards me. But I have indeed been exposed to her negativity and animosity many times. She has serious problems and I don't see my relationship in the future with her being anything close at all.

There are two strategies to dealing with narcissists: keeping boundaries and minimising your exposure to them. I'm assuming that you're old enough and "powerful enough" to keep boundaries and cut people out of your life. This is to stop any further damage. Don't put yourself in vulnerable situations around your abuser. This means that you have to be willing to sacrifice any positives you got out of your relationship. Make yourself as self reliant and autonomous as possible, so you don't have to depend on the narcicist for favours or emotional support. 

And you say that you're looking for ways to recover from the psychological trauma. For this I have two pieces of advice: meditate and talk to someone ( someone appreciates your situation) about your problems. The only way to improve your psyche is to partake in "personal development" with regards to all aspects of your life.

Don't forget that traumatic experiences give you room to grow and develop your psyche. By dealing with an irratating mother I have learnt how to see through people's manipulation and I'm no longer as much of a pushover. 

Edited May 31, 2018 by lmfao

[SpaceCowboy]

@lmfao Thanks for your advice! I've done a lot of therapy work lately and I am starting to feel better now. Healing is definitely possible. Teal Swans videos have helped me a lot, she really knows her shit!

[lmfao]

@SpaceCowboy ?

[Tistepiste]

On 3/26/2018 at 9:21 PM, SpaceCowboy said:

Hi folks,

I grew up with my narcissistic mother, which led to enormous emotional and psychological pain over the years. Now, I try to deal with the symptoms of PTSD after the many years of abuse. Has somebody gone through the same thing? How long did it take you to recover? Could you recover at all? I'm a little bit scared that I suffered irreversible brain damage because of the intense traumatic experiences.

Appreciate your anwers.

I'm really sorry to hear that. I don't know a lot about it, nor am I able to really be able to help you other than express my empathy to you and a lot of courage. I am glad that you could recognize the actions of your mother are from a narcissist's view meaning that I'd imagine you could put less energy / importance into her actions? 

I'd advise you to talk to a specialist/therapist who could give you some insight on how to deal with it. Since right now it is kind of a "hot topic" I am sure you could find the help you need.

I myself do not have experience with it so sadly I am not sure what to say to help you other than to meditate, try to forgive and let go.

Peace be with you, and I am curious about your development. The best of luck!

Edited July 14, 2018 by Tistepiste

[SpaceCowboy]

@Tistepiste Thanks for your kind words and compassion.

I‘ve certainly experienced a great deal of pain in my life, but that’s ok. From the higher perspective it should be like that, I guess. Every bit of suffering is grinding your ego and you are forced to surrender more and more. Which will get you closer to truth ultimately.

One big mistake I made was to take enlightenment as a kind of strategy to avoid my inner pain/shadow (spirituality defense mechanism) instead of facing shit directly. I thought this way I could escape myself, which of course doesn’t work. The only way out of the pain is through it. So don‘t do the same mistake if someone has similar issues.

[Nahm]

@SpaceCowboy https://www.actualized.org/forum/topic/23176-how-to-recover-from-a-traumatic-event/