How should we react to mistakes of others

[Elliot]

As a man how should we react when someone made a mistake unconsciously and it is effecting us? 

I'm remaining calm and not blaming or talking angry to that person's face but when i do like this i am afraiding being perceived as someone with no boundaries,

or i am not being sure that the other person understood his mistake and won't do it again. 

So what should we do in those situations?

[Charlotte]

Actions speak louder than words. 

If this person's decision has affected you, you learn from it for you. Make sure you don't ever get yourself into place where there actions affect you again. 

Bring it back to you. 

I may be wrong/right but this is what I would do. 

Oh and also practice forgiveness, they are unaware.

[Elliot]

8 minutes ago, Charlotte said:

Actions speak louder than words. 

If this person's decision has affected you, you learn from it for you. Make sure you don't ever get yourself into place where there actions affect you again. 

Bring it back to you. 

I may be wrong/right but this is what I would do. 

Oh and also practice forgiveness, they are unaware.

Yes of course i am being sure that same thing won't happen again, there can always be something i could do to prevent something from happening. But the thing here is i am thinking i am forgiving too easily.

Let's say i ordered something and person sent me the wrong product, or i asked someone to do the job for me that i clearly described and he delivered me something totally different.

In this cases  i would  automatically focus on the solution. I would go there and explain what he did wrong and talk about how can we he fix it.  So i would act like i  forgave him when i went there even though i am angry. Because i'm thinking my anger wouldn't benefit me  there.  I'm not sure if this is the true mindset.

[frnsh]

I have the same problem. Mainly because I have been a people pleasing person for too long and have been working on it. 

What I've learned is that defending your own space and ideals is not wrong. Specially when you see the other person totally violated it. Of course there is always the analysis on why he/she did it which leads to how much of it was your fault or how much that person ignored the general moral rules or the fact that people think and act differently depending on the situation, but it doesn't change the fact that you shouldn't express yourself. 

[Truth]

- realize everything will work out

- stop giving a fuck

- don't blame them or yourself

- be patient until it works out

- ?????

- profit! 

Edited March 15, 2018 by Truth

[pluto]

Coherent Communication, planting seeds, compassion and guidance. If it keeps happening and no change or growth is occurring after a while i guess you could say its wise to move and be with others closer to your level of consciousness/awareness.

We must not feed energy vampires, if you can rise above then that's excellent but the longer we remain around them the more chance and time they have to penetrate our field.

Peace & Love

 

[Truth]

40 minutes ago, pluto said:

the more chance and time they have to penetrate our field.

 

Sounds sexy.

[Forestluv]

@Elliot For me, I'd rephrase the question to:

What is my reaction to someone I perceive as acting inappropriately? Why do I view the behavior as a mistake? Who put these "rules" in my mind?

[Forestluv]

14 hours ago, Truth said:

Sounds sexy.

Especially the deep penetration.

[Elton]

On 14/03/2018 at 4:18 PM, Elliot said:

 

I'm remaining calm and not blaming or talking angry to that person's face but when i do like this i am afraiding being perceived as someone with no boundaries,

or i am not being sure that the other person understood his mistake and won't do it again. 

So what should we do in those situations?

First you also need not to be angry with him when he is not around. When you are by your self.

Also realise that you would have probably done the same. 

Controlling others behaviour is not easy.

'nothing is good or bad but thinking makes it so. '

[student]

You're afraid of not being angry, because for the majority that is the normal thing to do, also you don't like to be interpreted by others, others to have some kind of a power over you. But you don't understand that it is all about you, react angrily and you will create conflict, be calm, sympathetic, sincerely loving, friendly and that will actually show a high emotional inteligence. What you want, calm and peace, in fact independence, not being influenced by others reactions is a hard thing to acquire. My advice is to react however you want, it is nothing wrong with that, don't force yourself to be something that you don't understand or don't want to and just learn from the consequences, because everything has a consequence, a follow-up, and when they appear, be mindful and see the source of the conflict, the course of things. At the same time be interested in progress, your evolution, raise your consciousness and everything will come naturally, because everything should come naturally. In vain you force yourself to be something, because you will not succeed, you will just be confused and not feel harmonious.

Friendliness and calmness has nothing to do with others having some power over you. They have power when you immerse yourself in their own misery, when you trust them, their reality, their reactions.

[Spinoza]

I like this topic, personally i don't believe in Free Will, so even if you believe that the person was aware of what he is doing, it doesn't mean he deserve to be punished. cause in reality almost nobody is really aware of what he is doing. 

As Eckhart tolle said: "You forgive yourself by realizing that nobody can act beyond their level of consciousness."

In your place i will keep distance between me and the person, and don't think too much about it cause if you had the same background as him you will do the same thing, don't be angry cause it will only affect you and you will be tortured by your own thoughts.

Forgive everyone, don't force yourself if you are not convinced about forgiveness, but try to really understand why forgiving is peace and why everyone is not really evil. 

In situation where you cannot keep distance, even we are aware that the person is not evil, you need to defend yourself and stop them, because the person may do it again. 

Edited March 20, 2018 by Spinoza